oldie but a goodie

[marko 30]

Bricklayers Accident Report . . . .

This poor guy even had the nerve to admit his stupidity!

 

 

Possibly the funniest story in a long while. This is a bricklayer's accident

report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of

the Workers' Compensation board.

 

This is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award

for sure.......

 

 

Dear Sir,

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block

3 of the accident report form. I put 'poor planning' as the cause of my

accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following

details will be sufficient.

 

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone

on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, I found

that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be

slightly in excess of 500lbs.

 

Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a

barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on

the sixth floor.

 

Securing the rope at ground I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and

loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it

tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.

 

You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135 lbs.

Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my

presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I

proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.

 

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding

downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the fractured

skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in Section 3

of the accident report form. Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid

ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles

deep into the pulley.

 

Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to

hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain.

 

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground

and the bottom fell out of the barrel.

 

Now devoid of the weight of bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50

lbs. I refer you again to my weight.

 

As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for

the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs

and lower body.

 

Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed

to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and

fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.

 

I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable

to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope

and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me.

This explains the two broken legs.

 

I hope this answers your inquiry.

 

Kevin Roben - Victim of Circumstances

__________________

roll on 2008 fottie season...The silverware is just a stone throw away.....

[The one 8,470]

Its a oldie but a goody

[undisputed 1,664]

[High Accent 1]

Nice one. .Shame..

[DIGZY 4]

[Coney 3]

Quality.

[johnk 0]

sounds like something out of laurel and hardy,brilliant

[Get_On 3]