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MY MOTHER-IN-LAW


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went round to the in laws last night....

 

my mother-in-law was watching wimbledon....with the sound turned right down !!!!!

 

she said " i'm just listening to wimbledon !!"

 

and i said " but the sound is turned down ??"

 

to which she replied " yes.......its like a silent radio !!!!!!!! "

 

well how do you answer that..............so after about 10 mins i said " right i,m off i'll ring you tomorrow"

 

reply...." ok..................if i'm not in.....i'll be out !!!! "

 

so i left speechless !!!!!!!!

 

just wondered if anyone else has any daft mother -in-law stories ????

 

cheers

 

sean

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My first Mother-in-Law was an Angel..............which pleased me no end..........because my second one was still alive.

 

The phone rang once and my ex said........"How would you like to speak to my mother"....? I said "Through a f**king medium"

Needless to say we are no longer together....... :laugh:

 

 

Rolfe.

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Cant fault either of mine!

First wifes mum I still see and get on really well with.

Same with the second MIL get on real well.

I put it down to natural charm :whistling:

 

 

Shame I dont get on with their the daughters the same :whistling::whistling:

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My ex MIL is a psycho. Does nowt but lie, gossip, moan, complain and is always "no well hen" :doh: She does my nut in. We fell out a few months back, I called her a few choice names and now I don't have to speak to her anymore. If she wants to see her grandkids they're here when she wants them. She lives round the corner but acts as if I keep the kids from her. Lazy old cow.

 

Now me, I'm adopted but I know my biological mum and of course I still have my Mum who I grew up with. Which means I have a Buy One Get One Free offer on mother-in-laws :laugh:

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Guest foxyjo.

Sean...you made me laugh!! :clapper:

 

Foxcub's grandma on his dad's side is my best friend!!!

Freak's out his dad's girlfriends sometimes I think!! But his dad likes it. Everything is easy, we all help each other out. Love her to bits!! :notworthy:

 

Having said that, little dot's grandma on his dad's side is a case. :crazy: When we were expecting the little kit, she announced what I was to call him, and then said,

 

"I know your sort, you'll have some old english posh name, I hate that, I hate "George's", (my little brother!), ********'s (Foxcub) and..."

at this point flapping round searching for inspiration, she spied me dawg....

"...and.....and...I hate bloody Jason's too!"

 

I was a little taken a back, she'd just reeled off a list of names that were quite important to my family....george is an old family name...the cub's name is my grandad's name....a trifle rude for one stood in me kitchen... :o

 

....then i had a thought. :hmm:

 

"Hang on......your son's middle name is Jason!! Why would you call him that if you hate it so much?!"

 

She seemed struck dumb for a moment or two...then said

"Well....I forgot what I wanted to call him so just said the first names that came into my head"

 

Right. :icon_eek:

 

About a week later she asked if little kit's middle name could be George....it was.....afterall...her dad's name....... :headshot:: :lol::lol:

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Sean...you made me laugh!! :clapper:

 

Foxcub's grandma on his dad's side is my best friend!!!

Freak's out his dad's girlfriends sometimes I think!! But his dad likes it. Everything is easy, we all help each other out. Love her to bits!! :notworthy:

 

Having said that, little dot's grandma on his dad's side is a case. :crazy: When we were expecting the little kit, she announced what I was to call him, and then said,

 

"I know your sort, you'll have some old english posh name, I hate that, I hate "George's", (my little brother!), ********'s (Foxcub) and..."

at this point flapping round searching for inspiration, she spied me dawg....

"...and.....and...I hate bloody Jason's too!"

 

I was a little taken a back, she'd just reeled off a list of names that were quite important to my family....george is an old family name...the cub's name is my grandad's name....a trifle rude for one stood in me kitchen... :o

 

....then i had a thought. :hmm:

 

"Hang on......your son's middle name is Jason!! Why would you call him that if you hate it so much?!"

 

She seemed struck dumb for a moment or two...then said

"Well....I forgot what I wanted to call him so just said the first names that came into my head"

 

Right. :icon_eek:

 

About a week later she asked if little kit's middle name could be George....it was.....afterall...her dad's name....... :headshot:: :lol::lol:

 

INDEED!!!!

mine did similar, but not quite so rude, but equally as confusing.....

she hates "William" but named her youngest son "Will" ..

And when i was pregnant with my first son i wanted to name him after his dad..... for several reasons actually.... but mainly because i love the name Allen and there can never be enough of them in the world.

She got huffy about that.....(after she was huffy about my being pregnant to start with).... she didnt understand why i would name my child after his father.... but i never had the nerve to ask her why she named her son after HIS father.

thats right. my husband is an Allen Junior. and my oldest son is Allen the Third (or turd lol) and it only worked out that way because the runt was born just five hours shy of his grandad's birthday. seemed like fate to me!

 

 

the other thing she does is confuse my youngest sons name. She calls him Shawn, but his name is Shane :censored:

 

This woman also refuses to drive. she has a license though! there is even an extra car for her. but she refuses to do it because of an accident she had back in the early 1960's.. managed to drive her Volkswagen into a ditch lol But then she has the gall to get on my case when i dont feel like getting my license!! and gives all sorts of "handy driving advice" to me.... :icon_eek:

 

 

And the best one yet.... when i was about 4 months pregnant with my youngest son she and i went on a religious womens retreat(yes there will be irony in the end) it was her idea. she paid for the whole thing so i could go...

we get to the place, in a city i had never set foot in before, and she wants to sit around the condo the whole time!

i mention exploring and she gets nervous.

if i strayed more than twenty feet away she was coming after me!

And when it was time to sleep.....i wasnt tired. thats normal. i dont usually sleep the first night in a strange place. but she complained about the tv being on and that i was actually watching it......

the second day of this trip the hotel provided free lunch(ham sandwich, apple, small bag of chips) after one assembly, then everyone had about three hours to do what ever we wanted. I wanted to EXPLORE. it was Panama City for crying out loud! She did her best to dig her heels in and keep me at the hotel but i said "you can stay here. that nice security guard over there said theres some neat shops around" .... she followed me... and grumbled the whole time about how much her knee was hurting.

then grumbled in all the shops about how expensive everything was, then was astounded that i felt like i needed to BUY something for my husband and son.. just a couple of t-shirts and a hat, jeez! 30 bucks total.... then she got mad because i didnt get the shirt with the dolphins on it.

later that evening, the last part of the free time i wanted to go out to eat. lol i wanted to go to Greg's Crab Shack. :tongue2: she bitched about that too, wanted to know why i was still hungry after eating that whole sandwich, apple and bag of chips! then complained that it was going to rain and then she needed to get dressed up, shower, do her hair, make-up bla bla bla. The woman spent half the day looking normal. then suddenly she needed to get dressed up all fancy to go have dinner at Greg's Crab Shack??

she took so damned long getting ready that there was no longer time to go anywhere because the next assembly was starting. Oh i was REALLY hacked off about now. she didnt understand why i even wanted to go out anyway. we had snacks in the room......... snacks.......... apples, cheese, crackers, pop corn...... you try telling a pregnant woman to skip dinner, real food, to eat a bunch of crappy snacks in a f*cking hotel room with a neurotic old woman!!

 

i called my husband and was complaining about his crazy mother - all he could say was "i tried to warn you" :angry:

of course later that evening he surprised us all by showing up at the end of the assembly. (his mom was angry to see him lol) all the women there were ooohinh and awwwing and saying how they wished their husbands would do that :feck:

he ended up taking me out to dinner that night. it wasnt Greg's Crab Shack, but it was good enough.

he asked several times if i wanted to just come back home with him but i said no. i'm NOT running away from that woman! i started this, so i intend to finish it! (but i wanted to go home soooooo bad!)

 

anyway things got worse.. she over heard a conversation i was having about her with one of the other women in the condo - not good, but she was eavesdropping so it served her right! the other woman called her a control freak and i agreed lol but i felt bad because my MIL did pay for the whole trip.....

 

the next day at the final assembly the subject was about...... Bitterness and Worrying!! and the whole time we were there, thats all my MIL could do. complain, worry, and get pissy when someone didnt do what she wanted.

She would ask me what i wanted to do, i would tell her(explore!) and she'd say "no.... thats not what i meant"

well WTF do you mean then!? tell ME what you want ME to do!

 

learned my lesson! i've warned my husband to never leave me alone with her if he ever wanted to see his kids again.... :angry:

 

 

 

and thats only the short version of how annoyingly nutty my MIL can be.

Edited by BlueCoyote
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