Comments that make you laugh

[Malt 379]

For someone of less than average looks:

 

"Face like a bag of smashed crabs!"

[shepp 2,285]

Or ' A face like slapped shit '

 

Another I like is describing a rather untidy femail genitalia - ' It was like a badly stuffed kebab '

[AIRGUNNER 1]

Heres one for ya

 

I have so much bad luck, if i was to fall into a bucket full of tits i would come out sucking my thumb

[whip 1]

i was in kilkee co. clare buying horses off an old man of nearly , the "future olympic prospect"(lol) jumped straight into the middle of the fence and lay there for dead amongst the poles, without any hesitation the old man said "to be sure and they say all the best swimmers drown" still laughing 10 years later

[JollyPoacher 3]

Some of the Best nick names ive heard:

 

Eeaw - Moaniest Bloke you've ever met.

Axe - Bloke who thinks he is well hard but everyone else thinks he is a chopper.

Thrush - Irritating little c*Nt

Seal - The moment you meet him, you'll want to club him to death.

 

 

JP

[gwhite80 0]

Or ' A face like slapped shit '

 

Another I like is describing a rather untidy femail genitalia - ' It was like a badly stuffed kebab '

 

 

I've always used "Beef Curtains"or "Axe Wound" for this situation

[SportingShooter 0]

"You couldn't hit a cows arse with a spade"

 

"If you fell into a vipers pit you'd come out wearing snake skin shoes"

 

"What do think of it so far? ..............Rubbish!!"

 

My three bobs worth.

 

SS

[Tracy36 0]

if you've been out in the rain you get as 'wet as an otters pocket'. to someone whos bow legged (sorry to all those out there who are bow legged) 'could'nt stop a pig in an entry'.

[Tracy36 0]

oh and a nickname for the morning after when the beer goggles have worn off and you find yourself with someone who has a face like a bag of smashed crabs, " mate, he/she was an arm chewer!"

[lukey 1,621]

Or ' A face like slapped shit '

 

Another I like is describing a rather untidy femail genitalia - ' It was like a badly stuffed kebab '

 

 

I've always used "Beef Curtains"or "Axe Wound" for this situation

 

 

Cheese burger?

[wag 13]

Here is some more

when you get up in the mornig after i night on the beer

I HAVE GOT A MOUTH LIKE GHANDIS FLIP FLOP

 

and another if some one is trying to be clever

IF WIT WAS SH#T YOU WOULD BE CONSTAPATED

 

or if you think some one is full of it

 

YOUR OUGHT TO HAVE A CHAIN FIXED TO THE SIDE OF YOUR HEAD SO EVERY TIME YOU TALK YOU COULD PULL IT BECAUSE YOU TALK LIKE A SH#T HOUSE

[nbk 0]

"that bloke/bird has got a head like a bag of badgers"

 

"he/she wouldn't get a kick in a stampeed"

Edited June 6, 2008 by nbk

[SNAP SHOT 194]

IF i had a face like yours i'd hide it, And learn my arse how to speak..............................

[Miss Tarka 3]

My favourite comment to the unfortunate looking peopleout there.....

 

'Has anyone ever told you that you've got a face for the radio'.....

 

Takes them a while to figure out its an insult....and by the time they have you've walked off laughing,tee hee

 

Miss T. X

Edited June 6, 2008 by Miss Tarka

[shepp 2,285]

To someone with skinny legs ' Last time I see legs like that they were hanging out of a nest '

 

To someone unlucky with the women ' If you walked around Bangkok with a gold card glued to your forehead you still could'nt get a shag '