Jump to content

how many?


Guest gaspode

Recommended Posts

Guest gaspode

How many forum members does it take to change a light bulb?

 

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

 

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

 

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

 

1 to mark it 'Off Topic'

 

2 to argue about why it's not off topic if you started the thread

 

7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

 

5 to flame the spell checkers

 

3 to correct spelling/grammar flames

 

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid

 

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

 

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

 

19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a light bulb forum

 

11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

 

7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

 

4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

 

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

 

13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

 

5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

 

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

 

13 to say "do a search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

 

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again

 

:p:p:p

Link to post
Share on other sites

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS

 

40-ish................................49

Adventurous......................Slept with everyone.

Athletic...............................No breasts.

Average looking....................Mooooooo.

Beautiful.............................Pathological liar.

Emotionally Secure................On medication.

Feminist................................Fat.

Free spirit............................Junkie.

Friendship first......................Former sl*t.

New-Age............................Body hair in the wrong places.

Old-fashioned.......................No BJs.

Open-minded.......................Desperate.

Outgoing...........................Loud and Embarrassing.

Professional..........................B*tch.

Voluptuous..........................Very Fat.

Large frame.........................Hugely Fat.

Wants Soul mate..................Stalker.

 

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No

2. No = Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want

5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry

6. We need to talk = You're in trouble

7. Sure, go ahead = You better not

8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!

10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think

about?

 

MEN'S ENGLISH:

 

1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = Let's have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?

7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.

8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.

9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.

10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.

11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...