Popular Post jukel123 8,258 Posted Monday at 16:35 Popular Post Report Share Posted Monday at 16:35 A big hollow appears on your couch where you usually sit. You wake up with a mysterious pain in places where you didn't even know you had muscles or ligaments . You feel the cold more and start wearing thermal underclothes but keep it quiet. You religiously pick up litter near your house and don't care if people see you doing it. When your Mrs says "does my bum look big in this?" You say kindly " no way, its great." Whereas years ago you would have said, just for devilment, " course it does you've got a big bum" and then legged it before she slaps you. You calendar is full of various medical appointments. You start to show your Mrs ' man jobs' like where to find the stopcock of the house, where to pour windscreen fluid and how to inflate the car tyres. Cos times encroaching fast and you might not be around for much longer. You attend funerals on a monthly basis. Your Christmas card list gets shorter and shorter as people disappear off the planet. You feel tiny next to young men. You realise your spine has compressed and your muscle mass has diminished. You get pissed quicker but if you overdo it the hangover makes you feel closer to the grim reaper. You see girls in their party frocks in the middle of a winter's night and instead of thinking, I know what I'd do with her. You worry about them being cold and getting home safe. You go into Mc Donald's with your grandkids and feel completely confused but bluff you know how to order from a thing with buttons on the wall. You fart spectacularly like a horse. You get shocked when you look in a mirror and see a little bald headed old man the spit of your grandad. When you go swimming, you dive in, surface and instinctively flick the hair out of your eyes even though you've shaved your head for the last forty years. You become a lot kinder to people as you realise the pressure everybody is under. You become anonymous, especially to women who just see you as that old bloke like all the rest. Abroad, youngsters are very respectful to you and offer to give up their seat on public transport. If you take a tumble, nobody laughs and get concerned instead. Lol. Hope that cheered you up and prepares you for the future. 12 2 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Goly 503 Posted Monday at 16:37 Report Share Posted Monday at 16:37 That's me and I'm only 21. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
iworkwhippets 12,615 Posted Monday at 16:51 Report Share Posted Monday at 16:51 14 minutes ago, jukel123 said: A big hollow appears on your couch where you usually sit. You wake up with a mysterious pain in places where you didn't even know you had muscles or ligaments . You feel the cold more and start wearing thermal underclothes but keep it quiet. You religiously pick up litter near your house and don't care if people see you doing it. When your Mrs says "does my bum look big in this?" You say kindly " no way, its great." Whereas years ago you would have said, just for devilment, " course it does you've got a big bum" and then legged it before she slaps you. You calendar is full of various medical appointments. You start to show your Mrs ' man jobs' like where to find the stopcock of the house, where to pour windscreen fluid and how to inflate the car tyres. Cos times encroaching fast and you might not be around for much longer. You attend funerals on a monthly basis. Your Christmas card list gets shorter and shorter as people disappear off the planet. You feel tiny next to young men. You realise your spine has compressed and your muscle mass has diminished. You get pissed quicker but if you overdo it the hangover makes you feel closer to the grim reaper. You see girls in their party frocks in the middle of a winter's night and instead of thinking, I know what I'd do with her. You worry about them being cold and getting home safe. You go into Mc Donald's with your grandkids and feel completely confused but bluff you know how to order from a thing with buttons on the wall. You fart spectacularly like a horse. You get shocked when you look in a mirror and see a little bald headed old man the spit of your grandad. When you go swimming, you dive in, surface and instinctively flick the hair out of your eyes even though you've shaved your head for the last forty years. You become a lot kinder to people as you realise the pressure everybody is under. You become anonymous, especially to women who just see you as that old bloke like all the rest. Abroad, youngsters are very respectful to you and offer to give up their seat on public transport. If you take a tumble, nobody laughs and get concerned instead. Lol. Hope that cheered you up and prepares you for the future. Every word of that is true , and thanks for reminding me ya fecker 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Arry 22,017 Posted Monday at 16:58 Report Share Posted Monday at 16:58 Takes two days to recover from a days ferreting or metal detecting. Cheers Arry 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
vfr400boy 3,448 Posted Monday at 17:12 Report Share Posted Monday at 17:12 I know am old iv gone from owning a Honda sp1 to owning a honda st1300 it's not good ha 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
iworkwhippets 12,615 Posted Monday at 18:09 Report Share Posted Monday at 18:09 I've just changed the cushions on my couch around 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
downsouth 7,349 Posted Monday at 18:26 Report Share Posted Monday at 18:26 If you wake up needing a piss you better get up and have one within 2minutes. 1 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mC HULL 12,837 Posted Monday at 18:27 Report Share Posted Monday at 18:27 Just now, downsouth said: If you wake up needing a piss you better get up and have one within 2minutes. you getting up early busting you need to see a diebetes nurse lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
waltjnr 6,837 Posted Monday at 18:38 Report Share Posted Monday at 18:38 5 minutes ago, mC HULL said: you getting up early busting you need to see a diebetes nurse lol No no no ! Man up ,ignore symptoms, it will go away ,probably won't and you'll be dead in 12 months ,but if you'd gone to drs you'd be fine ! Getting old is not fun ,but no one avoids it 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
downsouth 7,349 Posted Monday at 19:06 Report Share Posted Monday at 19:06 Or when you turn your car stereo down so you can see stuff better 10 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
iworkwhippets 12,615 Posted Monday at 19:19 Report Share Posted Monday at 19:19 You lot are just surmising owd age, take it from me, owd age isn't pleasant what used to be the biggest limb on my body. I haven't seen in years , eh. It will.come to you.all Quote Link to post Share on other sites
low plains drifter 10,617 Posted Monday at 19:56 Report Share Posted Monday at 19:56 3 hours ago, Goly said: That's me and I'm only 21. Stone? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Goly 503 Posted Monday at 20:00 Report Share Posted Monday at 20:00 3 minutes ago, low plains drifter said: Stone? Ripped to the sausage. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
low plains drifter 10,617 Posted Monday at 20:04 Report Share Posted Monday at 20:04 3 minutes ago, Goly said: Ripped to the sausage. That's umbilical hernias for you Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WILF 47,202 Posted Monday at 20:13 Report Share Posted Monday at 20:13 I am embracing it, my favourite is to sit at the kitchen table and give absolute nonsense shit pearls of wisdom to my grown kids ! I like to finish off with telling everyone within earshot that “they don’t the meaning of hard work/pain/fighting/mountain climbing/flying the dam busters mission/being an astronaut/any given kind of suffering/hardship etc etc…” I can rest easy for the evening then ! 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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