jukel123 7,082 Posted June 19 Report Share Posted June 19 When I was a kid 'powder my nose' was a polite way for a woman to say she was going for a pee. I was at a wedding recently and the toilets suddenly became unisex with both genders snorting powder and smoking something that ponged like donkey shit. There was a lot of groaning in one cubicle which I believe was a couple enthusiastically mating. I felt like a walking relic. I wanted a pee but couldn't perform with females about..... Please no jokes. Penis malfunction whether erect or flacid is no laughing matter. Had to go outside for a pee in the bushes. The whole event gave me and the Mrs something to be scandalised about for weeks. 2 8 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 24,562 Posted June 19 Report Share Posted June 19 1 minute ago, jukel123 said: I was at a wedding recently Was it Wolfies? 9 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jukel123 7,082 Posted June 19 Report Share Posted June 19 1 minute ago, mackem said: Was it Wolfies? Bang on! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
chartpolski 21,071 Posted June 19 Report Share Posted June 19 9 minutes ago, Bakerboy said: Bought a big fck off bar of the orange flavour 1 thought it would last me a week ate it in a fckn day, wont buy another 1..lol Two Toblerones and a real bar of chocolate ! LOL ! Cheers. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jukel123 7,082 Posted June 19 Report Share Posted June 19 (edited) 39 minutes ago, mackem said: Was it Wolfies? The wedding was a simple Marxist affair. Big Neil from The Young Ones was best person and it was conducted by a transgender thing. The vows included a clause whereby all participants agreed to work towards the downfall of capitalism. Jeremy was there and was visibly moved. Diane couldn't make it....got her numbers mixed up and appeared the day. Jeremy comforted her. Edited June 19 by jukel123 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
chartpolski 21,071 Posted June 19 Report Share Posted June 19 22 minutes ago, chartpolski said: Two Toblerones and a real bar of chocolate ! LOL ! Cheers. It’s probably a sign of how well our friends know us; they brought my wife, amongst other things, the chocolates and a rather nice bottle of wine….they brought me two freshly baked pork pies from the local farm shop, a bottle of craft gin and a packet of Bombay Mix ! Cheers. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 24,562 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 8 hours ago, jukel123 said: The wedding was a simple Marxist affair. Big Neil from The Young Ones was best person and it was conducted by a transgender thing. The vows included a clause whereby all participants agreed to work towards the downfall of capitalism. Jeremy was there and was visibly moved. Diane couldn't make it....got her numbers mixed up and appeared the day. Jeremy comforted her. I am glad my invite was lost for this one old chap like lol 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Greyman 26,570 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 9 hours ago, jukel123 said: When I was a kid 'powder my nose' was a polite way for a woman to say she was going for a pee. I was at a wedding recently and the toilets suddenly became unisex with both genders snorting powder and smoking something that ponged like donkey shit. There was a lot of groaning in one cubicle which I believe was a couple enthusiastically mating. I felt like a walking relic. I wanted a pee but couldn't perform with females about..... Please no jokes. Penis malfunction whether erect or flacid is no laughing matter. Had to go outside for a pee in the bushes. The whole event gave me and the Mrs something to be scandalised about for weeks. The groaning from the toilet was probably the bird paying for her sniff, and before stiffy judges me I have never done sniff as it turns people into total pricks imo 2 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Greyman 26,570 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 19 hours ago, keepdiggin said: You’re a knowledgeable chap dc if you knew somebody banging sniff out who never works and buys Rolex’s smart clothes holidays nice cars and had a few pulls but doesn’t get charged would you say he’s a grass? What does it matter as long as it doesn’t spill into your life, people are still dealing with the bloke everyone can see what you see there choices and they alone have to deal with the consequences of those choices, you would be very surprised how little money it takes for most folk to lose all there morals, values and common sense, it’s also not good giving labels to people just on guesswork he may be a little bit more switched on than your average dealer or plod may be just giving him enough rope to hang himself if he is a big player, you seem to be doing ok in life and that’s all that really matters mate enjoy 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
keepdiggin 9,392 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 7 minutes ago, Greyman said: What does it matter as long as it doesn’t spill into your life, people are still dealing with the bloke everyone can see what you see there choices and they alone have to deal with the consequences of those choices, you would be very surprised how little money it takes for most folk to lose all there morals, values and common sense, it’s also not good giving labels to people just on guesswork he may be a little bit more switched on than your average dealer or plod may be just giving him enough rope to hang himself if he is a big player, you seem to be doing ok in life and that’s all that really matters mate enjoy Just brought up not to like rats pal I don’t live in the area anyway. im doing ok in life through honest hard work as you’re know how the game is yourself. ATB mate 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mC HULL 10,818 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 14 hours ago, Daniel cain said: If your Telling tales on folks....it will only get you so far.... personally,I wouldnt entertain anyone like the gentleman above... because of my morals.... sadly something lots of folks today, don't seem to have...a few lines of chonk comes before common sense these days they get people all the way mate the filth they will set you up in a house we’re you want live let you feed them your competition and make untold money aslong as your not killing people or letting out off your good Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Daniel cain 43,694 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 40 minutes ago, mC HULL said: they get people all the way mate the filth they will set you up in a house we’re you want live let you feed them your competition and make untold money aslong as your not killing people or letting out off your good Its a Funny old world we live in mate....you can be the biggest cnut going..get caught out...tell tales....carry the f**k on One of the reasons Im just an ordinary Joe...I couldn't live my life like that 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mushroom 12,476 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 I’m a member of a certain msging application group. Normally all that’s advertised is types of weed, hash, oils etc… I took a look the other day and everything and anything was posted for sale. Acid, Xanax…. And for the princely sum of 400€ you can have yourself a Glock with a full clip…. Obviously I wasn’t tempted at all Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 24,562 Posted June 20 Report Share Posted June 20 Saw two people central London today openly smoking crack,white girl early 20’s was scrabbling on the pavement legs covered in healed abscesses from whatever,no one gave a flying f**k,went round a corner a number of charity workers asking immigrant beggars is there anything they need? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Francie, 1,847 Posted June 21 Report Share Posted June 21 On 19/06/2024 at 21:46, Bakerboy said: Bought a big fck off bar of the orange flavour 1 thought it would last me a week ate it in a fckn day, wont buy another 1..lol Couple of year ages on fathers day me an the mates got a pound size bar each,ten squares,wee bastsrds collected me an says ere happy fathers day,an showed me two squares with the rest empty,said they ate eight squares already,lying hoors I ate four on the way fishing,said here eat some of that,really strong,they said eat it ya pussy,so I ate the lot,the bastsrds started laughing when I finished,they only ate two squares,I was f****d the whole night,couldn't walk for an hour lol thought the ground was swallowing me up,only a duck an couple chicks swam over to me an kept me right or I'd of freaked it hahaha 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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