Caught This Rat Today

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

In one of those big, circular crow traps? One inch steel mesh. Bugger was bouncing around in there. No fukking good to me. So, I figured I'd go and let him out.

Only, my appearance ~ on the scene of what was already a rather tense situation for him ~ sent him completely hysterical. So, he redoubled his efforts to get the fukk out of Dodge. Actually managed to force himself through a mesh.

One inch, remember. He's a full grown ~ well, 'teenage' ~ rat. I watched his ribs squeeze. Thought about how his guts must have flowed back up, after he'd damn near squeezed them out. Then, of course, the old pelvis let him down

I've seen this before. Rodent can slither through the most ridiculous holes. But, ye just can't do much about a pelvis. So, there he was. Tube of tooth paste. Stuck fast.

Tormented him for a bit. Tapping him on the head with a stalk of hay and such. He was going ballistic. But, he still wasn't going anywhere. I came back in here and dug out a Welders glove I have knocking around. That and a bit of stick. Wondered if I might poke him through. Or drag him somewhere.

Don't know exactly what I was doing, at the time. But, fukk me; He bit the end of an empty finger of that glove! Chomp!  Straight fukking through! Teeth met in the middle, inside all that leather! If my Finger had been in there?! Impressed me!

About all I came here to say, really. We all know the 'theory' type shit. Mice getting through pencil sized holes () Rats biting through concrete. All that. But, This was an eye opener.

I've spent a lifetime, pointedly avoiding the pointy ends of any live, wild rats. Well aware it would never end well. But, This?! Fukk me! Imagine if I'd just assumed that glove would offer me an iota of protection, and had grabbed the kunt!!!

Had to get the side cutter, in the end. Cut the fukking wire. That was 'interesting' too. Trying to keep the little shits face pinned down with the stick, whilst trying to get the cutter in next to his skin, inches away in my hand. Managed it.

He's got a story to tell now. " And, no shit! This kunt's tapping me on the nut with a bit of hay!!! "

 

[Nicepix 5,650]

Feckin' amateur. You could have axed his head off or used the cutters. Why release a rat? 

[iworkwhippets 12,628]

Bung it in fer bullstrode ken, 

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

1 hour ago, Nicepix said:

Feckin' amateur. You could have axed his head off or used the cutters. Why release a rat? 

Why kill it, Grasshopper?

 

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

[Squirrel_Basher 17,100]

Hope the fecker chews yer wiring .What the feck you thinking releasing a rat .

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

[darrren 414]

Be honest I don't kill them unless they are too many in number or causing my issues digging, chewing in the shed or eating my birds feed. When they start doing that though, they're gone. 

[low plains drifter 10,656]

On 23/08/2022 at 11:01, Ken's Deputy said:

 

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

^^^ What The Fukk is That?! I mean; What causes it? Do we know?

 

[Black neck 16,041]

17 minutes ago, Ken's Deputy said:

^^^ What The Fukk is That?! I mean; What causes it? Do we know?

 

Someone been choking the chicken

[DIDO.1 22,844]

I once released a grey squirrel. I had been paid to pick up a cage trap the customer had caught it in, take it away and dispatch the squirrel. Terrace house , town centre so said I'd take it away and shoot it rather than doing it there . Got to the house around 12 ish and the daft fecker had gone to work and left it on his door step since 8.30am and it was pisssing down. The only reason nobody had phoned the RSPCA is because it was paki town and the rag tag procession of smackheads, arabs and Eastern Europeans had simply had a poke at it or let their dogs have a bark. 

Anyway the poor sod was freezing cold, wet through and shivering. On my way home I drove past a massive woodland where I'd failed to get the squirrel control contract the year before so I stopped there and tipped it out. They only hammer the squirrels there every 4-5 years so I figured it would have a few years peace until someone tried to trap or shoot it

 

[iworkwhippets 12,628]

5 minutes ago, DIDO.1 said:

I once released a grey squirrel. I had been paid to pick up a cage trap the customer had caught it in, take it away and dispatch the squirrel. Terrace house , town centre so said I'd take it away and shoot it rather than doing it there . Got to the house around 12 ish and the daft fecker had gone to work and left it on his door step since 8.30am and it was pisssing down. The only reason nobody had phoned the RSPCA is because it was paki town and the rag tag procession of smackheads, arabs and Eastern Europeans had simply had a poke at it or let their dogs have a bark. 

Anyway the poor sod was freezing cold, wet through and shivering. On my way home I drove past a massive woodland where I'd failed to get the squirrel control contract the year before so I stopped there and tipped it out. They only hammer the squirrels there every 4-5 years so I figured it would have a few years peace until someone tried to trap or shoot it

 

   Top man, treat yourself to an extra tube of anusol

[DIDO.1 22,844]

19 minutes ago, iworkwhippets said:

   Top man, treat yourself to an extra tube of anusol

My bums been ok for a while now pal....hows yours?

[gnipper 6,505]

2 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

^^^ What The Fukk is That?! I mean; What causes it? Do we know?

 

People cause that. They breed naked neck chickens and pigeons.