What's cooking?

[ditchman 2,746]

34 minutes ago, mackem said:

My first venture into Indian food was in Delhi,the city,I caught amoebic dysentery that trip.

it was explained to me the reason why most indians are quite thin.....is that... they because of what they eat they have permantly got the squitters.........which would account for the miriad of small semi liquid pools of excrement found in poorer areas 

[mackem 26,222]

21 minutes ago, ditchman said:

it was explained to me the reason why most indians are quite thin.....is that... they because of what they eat they have permantly got the squitters.........which would account for the miriad of small semi liquid pools of excrement found in poorer areas 

Liquid shit is everywhere,look into an earth toilet it's like an artists pallette with multicoloured liquid shit,everyone gets the squirts with bum gravy.

[FLATTOP 4,363]

18 minutes ago, ditchman said:

it was explained to me the reason why most indians are quite thin.....is that... they because of what they eat they have permantly got the squitters.........which would account for the miriad of small semi liquid pools of excrement found in poorer areas 

One of my most funniest memories was going down a river in a rice boat in the backwaters of Kerala in India, over there is a load of beautiful lily pads up there is a sea eagle and just over there is a bloke having a projectile shit straight into the river I was crying with laughter others on the boat just didn’t get it lol  

[mackem 26,222]

4 minutes ago, FLATTOP said:

One of my most funniest memories was going down a river in a rice boat in the backwaters of Kerala in India, over there is a load of beautiful lily pads up there is a sea eagle and just over there is a bloke having a projectile shit straight into the river I was crying with laughter others on the boat just didn’t get it lol  

I did the kerala backwaters,did you go to the coast to see the Chinese fishing nets?I had the shits,wiped my bum on a pair of socks as it was all I had,threw them into the street and saw a kid walk off with them,total poverty.

[FLATTOP 4,363]

6 minutes ago, mackem said:

I did the kerala backwaters,did you go to the coast to see the Chinese fishing nets?I had the shits,wiped my bum on a pair of socks as it was all I had,threw them into the street and saw a kid walk off with them,total poverty.

The poverty is astounding that’s grim about the socks, I used to go on the beach with packs of cigarettes and hand them out to the fisherman I also helped to pull in the catch bloody hard work and the disappointment if it wasn’t a good one could be felt all around, I have a great memory of eating a meal on the beach overlooking the Arabian Sea out of a shack I still remember the name  Jacko’s with some mad biker and his Mrs on New Year’s Eve thinking it don’t get much better than this.

[ditchman 2,746]

40 minutes ago, FLATTOP said:

One of my most funniest memories was going down a river in a rice boat in the backwaters of Kerala in India, over there is a load of beautiful lily pads up there is a sea eagle and just over there is a bloke having a projectile shit straight into the river I was crying with laughter others on the boat just didn’t get it lol  

christ you boys have been about.....i had 17 years in africa...never did see stuff like that....

[mackem 26,222]

4 minutes ago, ditchman said:

christ you boys have been about.....i had 17 years in africa...never did see stuff like that....

What was the strangest thing you ate on the dark continent ditch,I think the only thing I would think twice about eating are the fly patties around lake Malawi.

[ditchman 2,746]

44 minutes ago, mackem said:

What was the strangest thing you ate on the dark continent ditch,I think the only thing I would think twice about eating are the fly patties around lake Malawi.

criket patties ...they were like sardine cakes......and cane rats BBQ'd on a smouldering log....(which was very very nice)

the worststuff i had was Moram beer......it was bloody awful and very strong...(at least i think it was alcohol...it did give me the shits tho')

[ditchman 2,746]

50 minutes ago, mackem said:

What was the strangest thing you ate on the dark continent ditch,I think the only thing I would think twice about eating are the fly patties around lake Malawi.

used to mantain the roads and bridges from Songea to Mbama bay on lake Malawi...and northwards up the lake edge...used to see at certain times of the year flumes of fly hatches on the lake...like smoke

[mackem 26,222]

4 minutes ago, ditchman said:

criket patties ...they were like sardine cakes......and cane rats BBQ'd on a smouldering log....(which was very very nice)

the worststuff i had was Moram beer......it was bloody awful and very strong...(at least i think it was alcohol...it did give me the shits tho')

I have had rats and crickets,I have never drank beer though lol.

[ditchman 2,746]

1 minute ago, mackem said:

I have had rats and crickets,I have never drank beer though lol.

you were sensible....i was not

[mackem 26,222]

Just now, ditchman said:

you are sensible.

Correctemundo ditch.