My Mate, With Cancer

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

Sorry. Don't even know why I'm doing this. I guess I just need to clear my head.

Mate of mine, on line. America. Known the guy twenty years now. He's had bladder cancer most of that time. Always having check ups. Always clipping bits of it out of him. Then, recently, it went fukking ballistic. He basically discharged himself and said fukk chemo. He's mid to later sixties.

We've always had a very casual, email, relationship. Dropping each other several pages, maybe a few months apart. Obviously though, with the way shit's gone, I've been pretty much checking for a pulse more like weekly.

Recently, having not heard back from him - since he sent me a weird one, all in blown up script - I posted him something like; " Shit's getting scary, man. You okay? ". He got back with something very much like: " Who's shit? I'm not scared. " (WTF?!)

So, I posted back along the lines of, " Not sure how compos mentis you are, mate? Maybe you could pass my addy to your sister, so she could let me know when ... "

That was days ago. Just got a mail back: " Leave my sister out of this. Don't be disrespectful. "

He's off fukking planet. And there's nothing I can say or do. Now, I guess, I'm sort of dreading a mail calling me all sorts of kunts, or something. Just the thought of his last scrambled, delusional thoughts of me being bad ones.

It's grim.

 

[Jonjon79 13,358]

That could be anything mate - it could have spread to his head (worse case scenario) making him go a bit funny or, he could be on new meds or self medicating.

 

Try sending him something really simple that he can't misconstrue.

 ................... 'How are you doing?' for example. 

[Astanley 11,580]

Guessing that it's the result of his meds or his condition ,then it doesn't matter ,if his last lucid memories of you were good ones ,then cling to that ..good luck to the man .

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

Yeah. Thanks, lads.

That's a particularly comforting thought, Stan; If he's lost the plot now? At least he won't even be aware of what he thinks he's thinking. His last lucid thoughts of me would have been of his old mate in UK.

Now the poor fukkers mind's unravelling, he won't even remember who the fukk he's having a go at. Very sad

He lives alone too. But, at least he has neighbours he knows well and will, no doubt, be dropping by to keep an eye on him.

Funny, Jonjon; In all the time I've knew him, I don't recall he's ever mentioned drink or drugs Ironically, cooking was his big side pleasure. How I'd love to have talked to him about my up and coming curry adventures.

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

This is the thing, Sid; I've been dropping him lines, since he told me he was fukked and refusing treatment. And he's just responding more and more garbled.

Balaur; Tried that, mate. It's now clear that his mind's just completely scrambled, sadly.

Obviously, I have the inside track on this. I know what I've said, and how he's responded. Not like I'm going to post our exchanges on here.

Just sad to see a good mate going down the pan.

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

No 'pity' or 'empathy' involved, mate. He's always been matter of fact about his cancer. I've always responded in kind.

Last couple or weeks or so though? It's been like; " What day is it, Don? " And he's answering, " Tanzanika dustbin lid. "

 

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

9 minutes ago, Balaur said:

Shouldn't laugh but if it is mental illness it's terrible and the person you knew has already left.....

Yeppers. I don't know if it would be properly defined as " Mental Illness "? Though, he's clearly lost his mental faculties, poor fukker. Maybe it Has gone to his brain? (My own worst nightmare!)

It's just fukking horrible, having what amounts to about my last mate in the world 'arguing with me' over things I haven't even said.

I know it's nobodies fault. Nothing anyone can do about it. He's not even aware.

It's just a fukking sad end to a relatively long term, great relationship. I just wish I could tell him; " Hey, Don, it's Me, man. All's good. I love you, man. I'm gonna miss you. You take it easy. Perhaps your sister can drop me the note? "

But, he'll just as likely come back, a few days later, with, " Wednesday?! Elephant soup trousers!!! "

It's fukking brutal.

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

1 minute ago, sid g said:

shame

Fukking Word!

[Daniel cain 46,087]

1 hour ago, Balaur said:

I don't know how the emoji got there ....

When you type  eighty in numbers

[dytkos 17,819]

Mrs got a phone call from an old friend from the Scilly's, another close friend at the time was in a Hospice, she got the number and rang her.

My Mrs"hi babe, how you doing?"

Won't say the lady name but her response was "I'm f***ing dieing"

Heartbreaking and I never knew the lass, before me and her got together 

Cheers, zD.

 

[greg64 2,850]

4 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

Yeah. Thanks, lads.

That's a particularly comforting thought, Stan; If he's lost the plot now? At least he won't even be aware of what he thinks he's thinking. His last lucid thoughts of me would have been of his old mate in UK.

Now the poor fukkers mind's unravelling, he won't even remember who the fukk he's having a go at. Very sad

He lives alone too. But, at least he has neighbours he knows well and will, no doubt, be dropping by to keep an eye on him.

Funny, Jonjon; In all the time I've knew him, I don't recall he's ever mentioned drink or drugs Ironically, cooking was his big side pleasure. How I'd love to have talked to him about my up and coming curry adventures.

could be morphined off his tits 

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

Could well be, Greg.

Hopefully, who ever's taking care of that will finally step in and provide some closure.

[terryd 8,599]

I have noticed folks in that situation just want to be treated as normal and give an ear if they need it or any thing else they may need 

[kanny 20,703]

Just crossed wires init.

Text can often be taken in the wrong context especially if your nut aint in a good place.