Single Men - You'll Be Amazed At This Simple Life Hack!

[shaaark 10,919]

2 minutes ago, Ken's Deputy said:

A lot of people feel that way. I never really took any notice of him. I just got a passing impression that he was yet another celebrity chef whose trade mark was swearing excessively, for effect. I dismissed him like a troll.

Then, about a year or so ago, I somehow found myself watching one of his " Kitchen Nightmare " episodes. Believe it or not, I quickly became hooked! I couldn't get enough of it and binge watched series after series.

What I realised is that yes, he shouts and swears a lot. The whole deal is also terribly formulaic; Dreadful place. Gordon screams at everyone. They clean the kitchen. He gets a team in to revamp the restaurant. He provides a new menu. Everyone turns over a new leaf. Happily ever after.

Yet, I just found it all greatly entertaining. And the funny thing is? He's actually a very compassionate bloke. He shouts and swears to shake people up and get them out of their ruts. A bit like a Drill Instructor. I like him

Yes, I've watched a few of those episodes where he's shouting and swearing in people's faces etc. And yes, some of those places did indeed, need a damned good overhaul, but there's no need to denigrate someone like that just because you're a tv celebrity chef hungry for tv ratings etc. 

I don't like him

[king 11,984]

2 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

Full inventory? 1. Bag of minced meat, for tonights dinner. 2. Dog meat, for their dinners. 3. Tub of margarine. 4. Jar of mint sauce. 5. Carrots. 6. Long since expired bottle of Ivermectin - now binned.

Oh, yeah! And a box of meal worms. And it's a full sized fridge too!

Well young Kenneth.

I would say that without a doubt you are definitely living the dream..

 

[Blackmag 6,117]

5 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

Lads, all you need is a microwave that sits below eye level. A dish of plain water. A cloth. And a bucket!

Place the dish of water in the microwave. Set it to High for five minutes. Wait a further minute. Remove the water.

Now, taking the cloth, wipe all round the Bottom and Sides of the microwave. Finally, wipe up inside the top where you can't normally see.

Regard the stuff that comes down, into the clean microwave. Consider what's been dropping into your food. Throw up into that bucket!

Seriously; I'm deep cleaning my place and learned the water trick in another forum. My eye level micro was pretty spotless anyway. But the roof of the one below it, below my eye level? Sweet fukcing jesus! How have I survived?!

It's works better with a bit of washing up liquid added Ken

[low plains drifter 10,736]

5 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

Dunno about that. I still reckon Gordon Ramsay would have punched me in the throat.

After completing an ultra marathon and ironing his mask

[eastcoast 4,199]

8 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

Lads, all you need is a microwave that sits below eye level. A dish of plain water. A cloth. And a bucket!

Place the dish of water in the microwave. Set it to High for five minutes. Wait a further minute. Remove the water.

Now, taking the cloth, wipe all round the Bottom and Sides of the microwave. Finally, wipe up inside the top where you can't normally see.

Regard the stuff that comes down, into the clean microwave. Consider what's been dropping into your food. Throw up into that bucket!

Seriously; I'm deep cleaning my place and learned the water trick in another forum. My eye level micro was pretty spotless anyway. But the roof of the one below it, below my eye level? Sweet fukcing jesus! How have I survived?!

Good advice (?) but, clean as you go. Workplace, kennels or the house that you live in. Good housekeeping keeps a man sane.

Or compromise some of your freedom and sanity and allow a woman to move in. l'm not quite there yet but the older that I get the more that  question decisions made in the past.

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

To be honest; I think this has all kicked off with me due, in no small part, to my recently having binge watched " Filth ", on you tube. (Fukcing great series! Some of the shit we see on there must surely make all but a couple of member here look like Howard Hughes level cleanliness freaks)

I've actually worked as part of a deep cleaning unit. So, yes, I've been there. Seen it. Had to scrape it up! Urgh!

That tip about the water in the micro though? I liked that. And it worked amazingly

Only one small nigger in the wood pile: Tonight I made a curry, in my electric pressure cooker. Great. Thought I'd have some rice with it.

Boiled some water. Chucked the rice in a jug. Poured water on. Stuck it in my lower microwave, as I've always done. (Yeah. FUKC!!! Basically 'steam cleaning' it again - Just as I've done countless times before, while prepping my rice in there!)

I don't care if " The microwaves will have killed all the bacteria ". If I drop my guts on someones dinner, and they microwave it; Is That okay? Because " The microwaves will have killed all the bacteria "?!

I've long since been advised to leave the door open, after use. But, hell; Now I'll use a paper towel too. And Look At the roof at least every week.

[stumfelter 3,034]

Two microwaves! Where do you live, Buckingham palace? Posh fcuker....   

[gnipper 6,543]

23 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

Full inventory? 1. Bag of minced meat, for tonights dinner. 2. Dog meat, for their dinners. 3. Tub of margarine. 4. Jar of mint sauce. 5. Carrots. 6. Long since expired bottle of Ivermectin - now binned.

Oh, yeah! And a box of meal worms. And it's a full sized fridge too!

I'd of thought the margarine would be kept on the windowsill 

[Nicepix 5,650]

15 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

To be honest; I think this has all kicked off with me due, in no small part, to my recently having binge watched " Filth ", on you tube. (Fukcing great series! Some of the shit we see on there must surely make all but a couple of member here look like Howard Hughes level cleanliness freaks)

I've actually worked as part of a deep cleaning unit. So, yes, I've been there. Seen it. Had to scrape it up! Urgh!

That tip about the water in the micro though? I liked that. And it worked amazingly

Only one small nigger in the wood pile: Tonight I made a curry, in my electric pressure cooker. Great. Thought I'd have some rice with it.

Boiled some water. Chucked the rice in a jug. Poured water on. Stuck it in my lower microwave, as I've always done. (Yeah. FUKC!!! Basically 'steam cleaning' it again - Just as I've done countless times before, while prepping my rice in there!)

I don't care if " The microwaves will have killed all the bacteria ". If I drop my guts on someones dinner, and they microwave it; Is That okay? Because " The microwaves will have killed all the bacteria "?!

I've long since been advised to leave the door open, after use. But, hell; Now I'll use a paper towel too. And Look At the roof at least every week.

You need a woman in your life.

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

Just got one! Brilliant girl. Found her on you tube and she showed me exactly what I need to get, to tackle some serious lime scale

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

Wait a minute. It's just dawned on me that I must be coming across as some 'Domestic God' here! LMFAO! All I seem to be talking about is deep cleaning my shit.

I'm into more manly shit too. Like doing DIY. I'm heart broken, as of an hour ago though. Because I've just bought a Sander, to do loads of sanding with. Then found the whole world has sold out of the particular wood stain I want!

I can't start stripping till I have something to put on the clean wood.

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

4 minutes ago, Balaur said:

eating out eh they were the days lol....

Believe it or not, I eat pretty damn well ~ considering 90% of it comes out of my microwaves

(Fukc me! Here I go again, sounding like this places answer to the black haired girl with the big tits! LOL!) But, yes, I've worked out that the secret is simply not to blast furnace meat in one. I used to put in a pork chop and bring out a work boot!

Now, I can micro a beef steak to perfection. Lovely, tender, juicy .... A bit like that bird with the black hair!

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

Au contraire mon ami! Kill something and put it in a micro. Just don't blast it while you wander off and do something different.

I put a healthy slab of beef steak in my lower one for two minutes a side. Barely more. And it comes out perfectly. Three or four minutes? I guarantee you, you could strap it to your foot and walk on it.

It took me years - and a lot of chewing dried out shit - to realise how wrong I was doing it.

[Nicepix 5,650]

2 hours ago, Ken's Deputy said:

Wait a minute. It's just dawned on me that I must be coming across as some 'Domestic God' here! LMFAO! All I seem to be talking about is deep cleaning my shit.

I'm into more manly shit too. Like doing DIY. I'm heart broken, as of an hour ago though. Because I've just bought a Sander, to do loads of sanding with. Then found the whole world has sold out of the particular wood stain I want!

I can't start stripping till I have something to put on the clean wood.

Are you John Richardson's script writer?

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

I looked him up. None the wiser!