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20 hours ago, jiggy said:

I think you should take a step back on these threads wilf too be fair. This thread is similar to the abortion thread. I'll give you an example why. My first son suffered from fatal foetal abnormality. At the 20 week scan which should of been a detailed scan and because there was 120 women on the public ward things were rushed and things were missed and a quick scan was given with no abnormality and we were sent home. The 24 week scan showed a problem and we were sent to Dublin for a 2nd opinion. The top professor in Ireland Dr Fergus Malone ( google him)was sent down to tell us that our child had no fluid in the womb and his lungs and kidneys had not developed more than a 12 week foetus because of this. Fluid is important to breath in and out for the expansion of lungs and kidneys to promote growth. He had a one in a thousand chance of survival and if he did was a straight away candidate for lung and kidney transplant and a lifetime of struggle which you can't get transplant until 2 years old. We didn't have the option of abortion in Ireland which in his opinion was bullshit in this situation but nurses told us if we wanted to go to Liverpool and then we were entitled to get a fatal injection over there. We would then have to return to an Irish hospital and present ourselves as a child that had no heartbeat and then if the child is deceased then you would be given an abortion here. When the post mortem is done here if there is one , then most medical practitioners turn a blind eye to the needle mark in the child's heart because they think it's a joke that people go through that ordeal. We didn't take that option after ( and I don't begrudge anybody who did) Instead we went full term and the child ,our child was born alive and lived for 20 minutes. The nurse asked me did I want to cut the umbilical cord and I asked her what would happen if I did. She told me the umbilical cord was keeping his blood supply alive and when it was cut he would die. I told her no thanks she could do it.  He died in my arms and I wouldn't wish that on my worse enemy.We had full funeral , grave, headstone the lot.   It wasn't nice  but that was our path but in no way shape or form would I dictate to another couple what their decision with their child would be. Unless you have directly been in this position wilf then I don't think you should have an opinion on what other people do unless you are a professional in this line of work. I'm glad I had that 20 minutes with him but that was our choice. It could be too hard for others.

Heart goes out to you jiggy, it's my boys 5th anniversary on Monday and we went through a similar but world apart thing. 

Jack was alive for 6 hours and passed in my arms, he was going to be flown to Bristol for a heart transplant at 3/4 hours of age but everytime they tried to put him in a travel incubator he crashed. After a few hours of him being resusctated and on more medication then he should have been on we had to make the choice and did. Did we make the right one for us ... no, we lost our son. Did we make the right decision for him? I' like to think so because after 6 hours of suffering he was allowed to make peace.

 

My boy also had a full funeral and headstone and carrying that little white coffin was by far the hardest thing I have ever done

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I can definitely understand the logic in what the doctors are saying....but speaking as a parent I'd be doing exactly what these parents are doing...I just couldn't give up on one of my kids...always

Thank you for your sentiments, Wilf, but I wasn't looking for sympathy mate. Not at all. I looked at this story, but I was also thinking of little Alfie Evans and many the many others like him. I

I'm gonna wade in here.... The waste in the NHS is fuucking disgusting! Paying ridiculous amounts to managers, stupid fees to import Drs to work the weekends from Europe and beyond, not training

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18 hours ago, WILF said:

Says a lot about how people’s mind works when the blokes who don’t approve of dead kids end up seeming to be the villains of the piece.......that’s what’s makes this forum so interesting for me.

Perhaps it' the hypocrisy? The fact your fine for other countries children to be bombed ... yeah sure that' cool

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1 hour ago, South hams hunter said:

Perhaps it' the hypocrisy? The fact your fine for other countries children to be bombed ... yeah sure that' cool

Thrush !

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The kid has been alive for two days, when Drs said he's be dead in 5 minutes..... he could easily have made it to Italy in that time and got the support he needed, until his parents were willing to say "ok that's enough" you of all people should understand this mate. Difficult decisions take a lot out of people, when they still have hope ;)

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5 minutes ago, South hams hunter said:

Whats more cruel, letting him die, which in itself will be cruel, or taking him to doctors that want to try an save him?

If they think the wee lad is gonna die anyway, then how could things get anymore cruel?

I just cant understand the reasoning of not letting them try, the wee mite deserves it, not to be given up on, especially as mush pointed out, the docs are wrong he still fighting he could have been at the brain hospital in italy.

Im really sorry to hear of your loss, i couldnt bare the thought mate, but that doesnt mean everyone has to choose the route you did.

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