Wardrobe malfunction

[Yokel Matt 918]

I had another reminder text about the number of deer on one of time farms I manage... apparently they were everywhere but even one would have been too many for this chap! I’d been trying to delay going over as my game larder is temporarily out of action and doubling up as a kitchen while we have an extension done and I’d been told by the wife in no uncertain terms was I not to bring anything back. Anyway, the farmer also casually mentioned that someone had knocked on his door asking about the shooting so I had to put a show in.

It was pretty bloody chilly at 06:15 this morning in Somerset but I thought I had a good omen when 15 yards from the car I found a shed antler that was pretty much frozen into the frosty ground.

 

What breeze there was was bitter and a look around the exposed lower reaches of the ground unsurprisingly yielded nothing. By the time I made it back to the truck the sun was up and would be hitting a bank of brush nearby so before heading home I went to pay it a visit as deer would be no doubt have holed up in it during the bitter night. 

I got there just as 4 were emerging from the brush onto a sun drenched bank. A nice plump doe follower looked just right so I made towards her. Reckoning on a nice looking tump of earth to take a prone shot.. I was only feet from it and they were oblivious to me. One last lunge and I’d be at the spot..... Rrrrrrriipp! The seat of my moleskin trousers parted spectacularly, the deer heads went up, clocked me, and buggered off! Standing up the breeze howled through the gap which was so big my moleskins looked more like a riding chaps?. 

 

Sod that so I packed off home, stopping in at a place a few more minutes from my house to just glass a hedgerow as an afterthought. A doe and a follower were 200+ m away against a bank of earth and the follower was making very heavy weather of it with what looked like a foreleg injury. Groaning and putting the Full English I’d been thinking about to the back of my mind I kitted up again and hopped out the truck. I got to within 160m and the adult doe clocked me and raised the alarm. The shot of sticks was a bit hasty out of necessity and took the follower in the brisket but, fortunately, both forelegs as well and she rolled down the bank. I thought I’d have to dispatch her but the 6.5 TTSX head had done it’s job so ‘all’ I had to do was scramble over brambles and stinging nettle stalks to retrieve her... getting poked and scratched on the ass both ways.

I was in no mood to have a earfull about bringing a deer home so I hung her up in a barn at the farm to do something with later.  The cold I was moaning about earlier will buy me some time but not some new trousers!

 

[Tyla 3,179]

Good to hear its not just me these things happen to ....

[leegreen 2,206]

1 hour ago, Tyla said:

Good to hear its not just me these things happen to ....

It's an age thing, or a pie and beer thing.

[Rabid 1,936]

Glad you had a spine and didn't let a wee draught from stopping you doing what was needed, good write up, cheers for sharing, makes me sound a bit more normal as that's my sort of luck.

[Ted Newgent 4,896]

atleast you werent launching yourself over a barbed wire fence and left your tackle hanging there

 

nice deer btw

[sussex 5,777]

Mine do that , I put it down to cheap cotton as opposed to a fat arse  ...and to many full English ..nice write up Matt ..

[walshie 2,804]

Made me laugh. What is the tonnage breaking strain for moleskin trousers? 

Riding chaps. lol. 

[Wullz 408]

Yep, glad to hear misfortunes happening to other people too. 

I went to jump a ditch in a hardwood plantation 3 weeks ago, on the trail of a destructive roe, didnt see the loop of wire that the fencer had left in the long grass......managed to snare myself round the ankle and my fairly considerable bulk came down, full weight on my hamstring, rrrrrip....fekkin sore....still limping.

We go the beast though, I shot it and my mate had to carry it!! Benefit of the injury....

 

[Yokel Matt 918]

Glad I’m not alone! It would definitely have been the long way round if any barbed wire fences were involved.. the brambles were bad enough! 

Just glad I wasn’t going commando!

[The one 8,507]

That's why when the sportsman gun centre have a sale i buy 2 or 3 pairs of trousers 

[Squirrel_Basher 17,100]

Why am I not surprised lol..Decent write up mate as usual .Roll on buck season 

[leslie harold gedge 1,390]

On ‎2‎/‎25‎/‎2018 at 20:41, Yokel Matt said:

I had another reminder text about the number of deer on one of time farms I manage... apparently they were everywhere but even one would have been too many for this chap! I’d been trying to delay going over as my game larder is temporarily out of action and doubling up as a kitchen while we have an extension done and I’d been told by the wife in no uncertain terms was I not to bring anything back. Anyway, the farmer also casually mentioned that someone had knocked on his door asking about the shooting so I had to put a show in.

It was pretty bloody chilly at 06:15 this morning in Somerset but I thought I had a good omen when 15 yards from the car I found a shed antler that was pretty much frozen into the frosty ground.

 

What breeze there was was bitter and a look around the exposed lower reaches of the ground unsurprisingly yielded nothing. By the time I made it back to the truck the sun was up and would be hitting a bank of brush nearby so before heading home I went to pay it a visit as deer would be no doubt have holed up in it during the bitter night. 

I got there just as 4 were emerging from the brush onto a sun drenched bank. A nice plump doe follower looked just right so I made towards her. Reckoning on a nice looking tump of earth to take a prone shot.. I was only feet from it and they were oblivious to me. One last lunge and I’d be at the spot..... Rrrrrrriipp! The seat of my moleskin trousers parted spectacularly, the deer heads went up, clocked me, and buggered off! Standing up the breeze howled through the gap which was so big my moleskins looked more like a riding chaps?. 

 

Sod that so I packed off home, stopping in at a place a few more minutes from my house to just glass a hedgerow as an afterthought. A doe and a follower were 200+ m away against a bank of earth and the follower was making very heavy weather of it with what looked like a foreleg injury. Groaning and putting the Full English I’d been thinking about to the back of my mind I kitted up again and hopped out the truck. I got to within 160m and the adult doe clocked me and raised the alarm. The shot of sticks was a bit hasty out of necessity and took the follower in the brisket but, fortunately, both forelegs as well and she rolled down the bank. I thought I’d have to dispatch her but the 6.5 TTSX head had done it’s job so ‘all’ I had to do was scramble over brambles and stinging nettle stalks to retrieve her... getting poked and scratched on the ass both ways.

I was in no mood to have a earfull about bringing a deer home so I hung her up in a barn at the farm to do something with later.  The cold I was moaning about earlier will buy me some time but not some new trousers!

 

great write up buddy has for the trousers I have 3 pair of them saving for the summer lol

 

[leslie harold gedge 1,390]

On ‎2‎/‎26‎/‎2018 at 03:05, sussex said:

Mine do that , I put it down to cheap cotton as opposed to a fat arse  ...and to many full English ..nice write up Matt ..

I have stopped trying to jump dykes at 62 now I look for some where to cross

 

[bird 9,977]

good  write up  , and nice lump of venison  to sell or eat, the trousers   haha   like it, i am for ever ripping my trousers  getting over fences,  your not as agile  at 65  to what i was 30 years ago, time catches up with everybody even old poachers like me lol .