Kids freedom

[Welsh_red 4,860]

Just wanted some thoughts and experiences from people on this.  At what age do you allow your kids freedom to leave the house on their own ? I was brought up in the countryside so I never really had the walking out the door to go play etc. I was dropped off at friend's house to play there. 

Im asking because my boy will be 8 in a few months and 1 of his friends gets let out of his estate house to go play down the park on his own with his little brother and another is allowed to walk home on his own after school.  For me and my Mrs we both know my boys not ready for that . He's far to laughy/bouncy/scatty to be trusted on his own . We live in a town of say 2k people and although horrible things happen anywhere it's quite quiet place 

Im just wondering what people have done in the past with their kids

[just-A-snap 1,269]

It depends on ones circumstances within the home.  One or both parents of the child working.  Trust, fear factor and so on, one can find a million and one more reasons to put back the first time ones child is out and about by themself.   Only you will ever know when to take the back seat. Nothing has change as to the amount of bad people out there, it is reported far more and more now days.

Good luck with taking your own first steps Welsh_red

All the very best

[forest of dean redneck 11,885]

It's a hard call nowadays there's kids on our estate/close been out playing out since they were 6-8 .

mine when they go up to secondary school

my 9 year old boy he's too immature to be let out on his own. 

One things for sure it's not same as when

i was a kid in late 70-80s

[The one 8,552]

Boy i work with took the next bus and sat at the back of the pictures to watch there son and hes 18 

[Welsh_red 4,860]

14 minutes ago, just-A-snap said:

It depends on ones circumstances within the home.  One or both parents of the child working.  Trust, fear factor and so on, one can find a million and one more reasons to put back the first time ones child is out and about by themself.   Only you will ever know when to take the back seat. Nothing has change as to the amount of bad people out there, it is reported far more and more now days.

Good luck with taking your own first steps Welsh_red

All the very best

Yeah I know my boys not ready . To childlike (which is a good thing in my eyes)

[Welsh_red 4,860]

6 minutes ago, forest of dean redneck said:

It's a hard call nowadays there's kids on our estate/close been out playing out since they were 6-8 .

mine when they go up to secondary school

my 9 year old boy he's too immature to be let out on his own. 

One things for sure it's not same as when

i was a kid in late 70-80s

I know my boy and even tho we've drilled in to him about strangers etc if he was down the park with his pals playing football and someone Joined in older than them he'd love it.  Then the guy could mention pokemon cards and my son would absolutely love it. And without thinking about it and with promises of seing the rarest pokemon card my boy would wander off. He gets to "into things"

[forest of dean redneck 11,885]

1 minute ago, Welsh_red said:

I know my boy and even tho we've drilled in to him about strangers etc if he was down the park with his pals playing football and someone Joined in older than them he'd love it.  Then the guy could mention pokemon cards and my son would absolutely love it. And without thinking about it and with promises of seing the rarest pokemon card my boy would wander off. He gets to "into things"

Yeah my older 2 boys are pretty smart , this lad my wife wants to get him checked out for autism,me I think I dropped him to much when he was a baby ? But mentally he's about 6 ,my daughter is 7 next month I may let her out in 10 year time ?

[dave88 1,565]

With my 2 boys being autistic I don't think theyll ever be out on their own....and with the girls it can wait till their wedding day

[DIDO.1 22,855]

I think the answer is to trust your instinct. You also have to be aware of what his friends are doing so he doesn't feel left behind and rebel. 

[THE STIFFMEISTER 16,554]

I feel for you David I really do. 

My 5 year old girl is diagnosed in the spectrum, were in the process of a re diagnosis really and I know she’s not as bad as some kids are. I feel for you mate , a lad in her class is hugely autistic , it’s heartbreaking at times when you see him. 

My little girl is allowed out to the park, she can only go if there are older kids there or a grown up. 

She flies out on her scooter with me and heads off to her mates. We live in an isolated estate in the countryside, so we all now each other. 

The park is forty yards from our front door and the skate park another forty from that. 

Last summer she went missing , her and her little pal , I was in the back garden and I saw them go into our cul de sac, then the sound of their scooters , I went out with the dog and a brew 5 mins later to check them and found the scooters in the road. 

Walked round for five mins, no sign , so me and her mates dad, straight into my car and we went down the one way road , we are fenced in and only have one access point so worked our way back from the main toad, 

we found them both , 10 mins later in an empty house on our street , three doors down, they’d broke in the patio door and had been setting themselves up a play house making ghost noises at each other, they’d tied the recycling bags around their necks as capes as well . 

Little b*****ds! 

Later that night as she slept I felt sick at the thought of them being locked in there accidentally. 

That was the end of her summer of freedom and gave me a shot across the bows for taking our secure space for granted 

[Kay 3,709]

16 minutes ago, THE STIFFMEISTER said:

I feel for you David I really do. 

My 5 year old girl is diagnosed in the spectrum, were in the process of a re diagnosis really and I know she’s not as bad as some kids are. I feel for you mate , a lad in her class is hugely autistic , it’s heartbreaking at times when you see him. 

My little girl is allowed out to the park, she can only go if there are older kids there or a grown up. 

She flies out on her scooter with me and heads off to her mates. We live in an isolated estate in the countryside, so we all now each other. 

The park is forty yards from our front door and the skate park another forty from that. 

Last summer she went missing , her and her little pal , I was in the back garden and I saw them go into our cul de sac, then the sound of their scooters , I went out with the dog and a brew 5 mins later to check them and found the scooters in the road. 

Walked round for five mins, no sign , so me and her mates dad, straight into my car and we went down the one way road , we are fenced in and only have one access point so worked our way back from the main toad, 

we found them both , 10 mins later in an empty house on our street , three doors down, they’d broke in the patio door and had been setting themselves up a play house making ghost noises at each other, they’d tied the recycling bags around their necks as capes as well . 

Little b*****ds! 

Later that night as she slept I felt sick at the thought of them being locked in there accidentally. 

That was the end of her summer of freedom and gave me a shot across the bows for taking our secure space for granted 

I had a scare with my youngest on the day of the golden jubilee, both mine  had played out , eldest was back for his tea  about 6pm & no sign of the younger lad  , so i went a walk round & asked if anyone had seen him, my older lad went to look on his bike  & after about an hour we still hadn't found him I was in a real panic by now so i told my lad to wait at home & i went another walk round 

I could hear music on the estate & low & behold there he was sat at a tresall table eating trifle at a street party having a fantastic time the little shit

[dave88 1,565]

9 hours ago, THE STIFFMEISTER said:

I feel for you David I really do. 

My 5 year old girl is diagnosed in the spectrum, were in the process of a re diagnosis really and I know she’s not as bad as some kids are. I feel for you mate , a lad in her class is hugely autistic , it’s heartbreaking at times when you see him. 

My little girl is allowed out to the park, she can only go if there are older kids there or a grown up. 

She flies out on her scooter with me and heads off to her mates. We live in an isolated estate in the countryside, so we all now each other. 

The park is forty yards from our front door and the skate park another forty from that. 

Last summer she went missing , her and her little pal , I was in the back garden and I saw them go into our cul de sac, then the sound of their scooters , I went out with the dog and a brew 5 mins later to check them and found the scooters in the road. 

Walked round for five mins, no sign , so me and her mates dad, straight into my car and we went down the one way road , we are fenced in and only have one access point so worked our way back from the main toad, 

we found them both , 10 mins later in an empty house on our street , three doors down, they’d broke in the patio door and had been setting themselves up a play house making ghost noises at each other, they’d tied the recycling bags around their necks as capes as well . 

Little b*****ds! 

Later that night as she slept I felt sick at the thought of them being locked in there accidentally. 

That was the end of her summer of freedom and gave me a shot across the bows for taking our secure space for granted 

Cheers mate,  they're only 3 and 5 so they might suprise me yet but as it stands I don't see it happening...my 5 year old is getting better and his speech is coming on great but my 3 year old lad is worse...no social skills what so ever,  very little eye contact and can only say 2-3 words. You say you're going through a re diagnosis?  Can I ask why mate? 

[slip lead 862]

Just too let you know, the worries never stop, just get worse as they get older.

Then the grandchildren come along and it seems even more worrying than before.

[forest of dean redneck 11,885]

4 hours ago, slip lead said:

Just too let you know, the worries never stop, just get worse as they get older.

Then the grandchildren come along and it seems even more worrying than before.

Your can hand grandkids back ? 

[KES2 171]

My parents let me know they would love to see my children but they were not going to be substitute parents.

So the worry was confined to parents only.

My daughter was and still is, the joy of my life and I had to work hard to let her out of my sight . We had a pact that she could call me anytime anywhere and I would go  and collect her and because I could.

She had her freedom to be with friends and go out at 14. Train journeys to local towns to shop - I would drop her off and collect her - always early, always worried.

Come 17 she was more wordly wise than I would have hoped but when the time came to let her go to uni, we had some understanding.

Dont let them go out alone - just slowly let go of the strings would be my best advice - it worked for me.