hawki 1,431 Posted January 29, 2017 Report Share Posted January 29, 2017 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
cragman 2,770 Posted January 29, 2017 Report Share Posted January 29, 2017 Now, that was funny. Can't wait to tell those when we run one in? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Blackbriar 8,569 Posted January 31, 2017 Report Share Posted January 31, 2017 I worry about Alzheimer's a lot ! But I've decided to forget about it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
neil cooney 10,416 Posted January 31, 2017 Report Share Posted January 31, 2017 Yesterday a lady asked me did I know any double entendre's ? So I gave her one ! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bob.243 8,755 Posted January 31, 2017 Report Share Posted January 31, 2017 . 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ronny Posted January 31, 2017 Report Share Posted January 31, 2017 A marriage counsellor asked a couple, what they had in common. The husband says, " Well, for starters, neither of us suck dick." 8 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mister Gain 1,764 Posted February 1, 2017 Report Share Posted February 1, 2017 Fell asleep at a party last night and some b*stard put a teabag in my mouth. I went fcuking mental... nobody treats me like a mug! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Blackbriar 8,569 Posted February 1, 2017 Report Share Posted February 1, 2017 My wife said she was leaving me, because of my obsession with The Monkees. At first, I thought she was joking - then I saw her face..... 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mister Gain 1,764 Posted February 1, 2017 Report Share Posted February 1, 2017 The Mrs said to me "Get your stuff packed, I want you gone, I'm absolutely sick of your obsession with Only Fools And Horses" I said "OK, I'll fetch the suitcase from the van." 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
walshie 2,804 Posted February 1, 2017 Report Share Posted February 1, 2017 My doctor said to me, "I'm sorry to say, but you have a terminal illness." I said, "How long do I have?" "10." he replied. "Oh god no. 10 what? Months, weeks, days?" "9...8..." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dinosaurs 2,044 Posted February 1, 2017 Report Share Posted February 1, 2017 Ronny. Bloody hell bud i spat my tea out laughing ??????? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dmitry Ivanov 98 Posted February 1, 2017 Report Share Posted February 1, 2017 No luck ))) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dinosaurs 2,044 Posted February 1, 2017 Report Share Posted February 1, 2017 Is that your version of Park & Ride?? Atb 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mister Gain 1,764 Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 Paddy shouts frantically into the phone " My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only 2 minutes apart!" " Is this her first child?" asks the doctor. " No", shouts Paddy, " This is her husband!" 8 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ronny Posted February 2, 2017 Report Share Posted February 2, 2017 My wife accused me of being a transvestite. So I packed her things and left! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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