Jump to content

Recommended Posts


  • Replies 11.3k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

A MONTANA COWBOY, A NATIVE AMERICAN AND A MUSLIM ARE WAITING FOR THEIR PLANE IN A SMALL MONTANA AIRPORT. THE MONTANA COWBOY LEANS BACK IN HIS CHAIR, CROSSES HIS BOOTS ON A MAGAZINE TABLE AND TIPS

Posted Images

 

 

A duck walks into a bar and asks: "Got any Bread?"

 

Barman says: "No."

 

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

 

Barman says: "No."

 

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

 

Barman says: "No, we have no bread."

 

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

 

Barman says: "No, we haven't got any bread!"

 

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

 

Barman says: "No, are you deaf?! We haven't got any bread, and if you ask me again and I'll nail your cuntin beak to the bar you irritating cuntin duck!"

 

Duck says: "Got any nails?"

 

Barman says: "No"

 

Duck says: "Got any bread?

  • Like 6
Link to post
Share on other sites

 

 

 

A panda walks into a bar. He asks the bartender how he can get a little action for the night. The bartender motions to a young woman. She talks to the panda, and they go back to her place. After having sex, the panda abruptly leaves. The next night, the woman goes to the panda's house. "You owe me money," she says. "For what?" The woman rolls her eyes and explains, "I'm a prostitute." The panda pulls out a dictionary and looks it up: "Prostitute: Has sex for money." The panda says, "I don't have to pay you. I'm a panda. Look it up." She is about to protest when the panda hands her the dictionary. The woman looks up "panda" in the dictionary, and it reads, "Panda: Eats bush and leaves.

Should be eats shoots and leaves Smithy ffs

 

Cheers, D.

No it should be "eats, roots, shoots and leaves." LOL.

cmon its the oldest joke in the book, its eats shoots and leaves , ie bamboo shoots :)

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

IN RESPONSE TO ALL RECENT E-MAILS ABOUT OUR DOG: PLEASE BE ADVISED, WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF ANSWERING QUESTIONS ABOUT HIM.




YES, HE BIT TWO PEOPLE WEARING BURKAS:



and TEN PEOPLE WEARING TURBANS,



and TWENTY PEOPLE WEARING JEREMY CORBYN T-SHIRTS,



and TWO CAR DRIVERS WITH RAP MUSIC BLARING FROM THEIR VEHICLES



and FOUR JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES,



and NINE TEENAGERS WITH PANTS HANGING PAST THEIR ARSE CRACKS,



and THREE MUSLIMS AND A PAKISTANI TAXI DRIVER.



FOR THE LAST TIME. . .THE DOG IS NOT FOR SALE!

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   1 member


×
×
  • Create New...