Funny Joke Thread

[Ken's Deputy 4,460]

This made me laugh, anyway :

 

[DIDO.1 22,844]

[DIDO.1 22,844]

[DIDO.1 22,844]

[South hams hunter 8,924]

[dytkos 17,803]

85% of homeless are men

 76% of suicides are men

70% of murder victims are men

 92% of deaths in the workplace are men

7% of men get custody after a divorce

 97% of war deaths are men

The joke is feminism; the idea that society oppresses women is laughable. Feminism is weak women using their gender as a reason for being weak and need to go to seminars and listen to some sour-cunted hag talk about female empowerment to feel f***ing validated when in reality you're just a vagina with legs that makes sandwiches and pushes the hoover around a bit.

 

Cheers, D.

[dytkos 17,803]

A brand new car is being launched in Portugal, which includes space in the boot for a child. It's called the Renault McCann.

 

 

I had five hundred Kit Kats in my fridge and my mate had one in his. I pressured him into giving his to a homeless person. That's basically how celebrity charity appeals work. 

Cheers, D.

 

[dytkos 17,803]

I need to re-home a dog. It's a small terrier, and tends to bark a lot. If you're interested, let me know and I'll jump over next doors fence and get it for you.

 

My doctor told me to take up an activity that gets me out of the pub.

So I've started smoking.

 

I was worried that the mechanic would rip me off because I was a blonde woman. Imagine my relief when I found out that I only needed indicator fluid.

 

Cheers, D.

[keepdiggin 9,561]

[DIDO.1 22,844]

[Mickey Finn 3,014]

[trigger2 3,145]

My boss has just asked me why I come out in a rash every time he gives me my wages,

To which I replied its because I am allergic to f***ing peanuts 

[South hams hunter 8,924]

[DIDO.1 22,844]

[kanny 20,639]