Jonjon79 13,358 Posted April 10, 2021 Report Share Posted April 10, 2021 1 8 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Councilestatekid 1,832 Posted April 10, 2021 Report Share Posted April 10, 2021 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jonjon79 13,358 Posted April 10, 2021 Report Share Posted April 10, 2021 1 1 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smithie 2,443 Posted April 10, 2021 Report Share Posted April 10, 2021 A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. "Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!" He slams the door and returns to bed. "Who was that?" asked his wife. "Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers. "Did you help him?" she asks. "No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is pouring rain out there!" "Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!" The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?" "Yes," comes back the answer. "Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband. "Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark. "Where are you?" asks the husband. "Over here on the swing," replied the drunk 1 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,784 Posted April 11, 2021 Report Share Posted April 11, 2021 Cheers, D. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,784 Posted April 11, 2021 Report Share Posted April 11, 2021 Cheers, D. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,784 Posted April 11, 2021 Report Share Posted April 11, 2021 Cheers, D. R.l.P. Nikki Grahame Quote Link to post Share on other sites
hawki 1,431 Posted April 11, 2021 Report Share Posted April 11, 2021 too popular its going to shite lads Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Councilestatekid 1,832 Posted April 11, 2021 Report Share Posted April 11, 2021 1 7 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,784 Posted April 11, 2021 Report Share Posted April 11, 2021 Cheers, D. 2 1 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,784 Posted April 11, 2021 Report Share Posted April 11, 2021 Cheers, D. 3 1 4 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
pesky1972 5,219 Posted April 12, 2021 Report Share Posted April 12, 2021 They say “a woman’s work is never done”. Maybe that’s why they don’t get paid the same as men? And they reckon there are 3.8 billion women on this planet.., then why the fcuk isn’t it clean yet? 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smithie 2,443 Posted April 12, 2021 Report Share Posted April 12, 2021 Teacher: If I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have? Johnny: Seven Sir Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have? Johnny: Seven Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you 2 apples, and another 2 apples and another 2, how many will you have? Johnny: Six. Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have? Johnny: Seven! Teacher: Where the **** do you get seven from? Johnny: Because I've already got a ******* rabbit at home 1 16 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,784 Posted April 13, 2021 Report Share Posted April 13, 2021 Cheers, D. 1 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,784 Posted April 13, 2021 Report Share Posted April 13, 2021 Cheers, D. 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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