Lenmcharristar 9,763 Posted July 26, 2023 Report Share Posted July 26, 2023 1 hour ago, forest of dean redneck said: Wonder if he’s related to Ned Kelly ?? Id say theres a better chance of andy from little britain 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dytkos 17,793 Posted July 26, 2023 Report Share Posted July 26, 2023 6 hours ago, kanny said: I had to write a Ballad so the story becomes folklore lol Andy Kelly's Cunning Ballad (Verse 1) In a small town, lived a man named Andy Kelly, A silver tongue, a master of deception, they'd tell me. With charm and wit, he spun his web so sly, He wove a tale of woe that made you sigh. (Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke. (Verse 2) He'd roam the streets, with his faithful hound in tow, A sorry sight, a mutt that seemed to have lost its glow. With tearful eyes, he'd tell passersby his plight, "How can I live without my dog's bark so bright?" (Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke. (Verse 3) The townsfolk fell for his sob story each day, Believed his lies, their sympathy led them to pay. He'd collect their coins, saying it's for a cure, While all along, his deception would endure. (Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke. (Bridge) But the truth has a way of coming to light, And Andy's deceit would soon take flight. A local detective, wise and keen, Uncovered the ruse, the deceptive scene. (Verse 4) The townsfolk learned of Andy's cunning game, Their generosity taken, their hearts inflamed. In anger and sorrow, they rallied as one, To bring justice to this crafty, cunning con. (Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke. (Verse 5) Before the judge, Andy stood to defend, His web of lies starting to rapidly descend. No longer would he weave his tales of woe, For justice had caught up, it was time to go. (Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke. (Outro) And so, the tale of Andy Kelly's deceit, A lesson learned, a cautionary beat. Beware the words of those who play pretend, For truth and honesty, in the end, transcend. Stick to carpentry and cooking. Cheers, D. 1 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Waz 4,262 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 On 26/07/2023 at 13:24, mackem said: I imagine that sung vibrato in a medieval court while playing a lute. Naked 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 26,439 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 19 minutes ago, Waz said: Naked Like a wandering court stripper-minstrel?I have just seen a fat black lass on the news totally naked (I wish I could unsee that) walking on the freeway in SanFran firing a pistol at passing cars. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mel b 2,398 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 25 minutes ago, mackem said: Like a wandering court stripper-minstrel?I have just seen a fat black lass on the news totally naked (I wish I could unsee that) walking on the freeway in SanFran firing a pistol at passing cars. Oh my god , a , naked , fat , crazy , woman with a gun . I'm in love . 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackem 26,439 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 15 minutes ago, mel b said: Oh my god , a , naked , fat , crazy , woman with a gun . I'm in love . Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mel b 2,398 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 36 minutes ago, mackem said: I'd be on that like a tramp on hot chips . 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BGD 6,436 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 On 25/07/2023 at 20:58, lurcherman 887 said: We must never forget this like the holocaust we must keep this alive This actually happened though 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BGD 6,436 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 Do we know if his dog ever got his bark back?? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DIDO.1 22,811 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 3 minutes ago, BGD said: This actually happened though Alright Corbyn, calm down. You know that stuff lost you an election 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mel b 2,398 Posted July 28, 2023 Report Share Posted July 28, 2023 46 minutes ago, BGD said: Do we know if his dog ever got his bark back?? Yes , but it's still feeling a bit ruff Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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