Hunting Life Member Attacked.

[Qbgrey 4,089]

They must be some powerful binoculars to see rabbits underground . Who the f**k takes Binos  ferreting??

[low plains drifter 10,394]

20 minutes ago, Qbgrey said:

They must be some powerful binoculars to see rabbits underground . Who the f**k takes Binos  ferreting??

We couldn't even dream about binoculars

[lurcherman 887 13,094]

25 minutes ago, Qbgrey said:

They must be some powerful binoculars to see rabbits underground . Who the f**k takes Binos  ferreting??

there to see highwaymen out on the fleece 

[EDDIE B 3,162]

Heard after the theft, he became none binary 

[lurcherman 887 13,094]

Can we have guesses of what really happened then? 
 

“Look this way Andy going to take a pic for the thl massive look sad and distraught”

[EDDIE B 3,162]

1 hour ago, lurcherman 887 said:

Can we have guesses of what really happened then? 
 

“Look this way Andy going to take a pic for the thl massive look sad and distraught”

Didn't he simply just fall over and damaged the shoulder. He was too up his own arse and embarrassed to tell the trurh, so made up a wild story.

[kanny 20,504]

I had to write a Ballad so the story becomes folklore lol

 

Andy Kelly's Cunning Ballad

 

 

 

(Verse 1) In a small town, lived a man named Andy Kelly, A silver tongue, a master of deception, they'd tell me. With charm and wit, he spun his web so sly, He wove a tale of woe that made you sigh.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Verse 2) He'd roam the streets, with his faithful hound in tow, A sorry sight, a mutt that seemed to have lost its glow. With tearful eyes, he'd tell passersby his plight, "How can I live without my dog's bark so bright?"

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Verse 3) The townsfolk fell for his sob story each day, Believed his lies, their sympathy led them to pay. He'd collect their coins, saying it's for a cure, While all along, his deception would endure.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Bridge) But the truth has a way of coming to light, And Andy's deceit would soon take flight. A local detective, wise and keen, Uncovered the ruse, the deceptive scene.

(Verse 4) The townsfolk learned of Andy's cunning game, Their generosity taken, their hearts inflamed. In anger and sorrow, they rallied as one, To bring justice to this crafty, cunning con.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Verse 5) Before the judge, Andy stood to defend, His web of lies starting to rapidly descend. No longer would he weave his tales of woe, For justice had caught up, it was time to go.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Outro) And so, the tale of Andy Kelly's deceit, A lesson learned, a cautionary beat. Beware the words of those who play pretend, For truth and honesty, in the end, transcend.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[chartpolski 23,322]

15 minutes ago, EDDIE B said:

Didn't he simply just fall over and damaged the shoulder. He was too up his own arse and embarrassed to tell the trurh, so made up a wild story.

That’s basically the story I heard ; he fell and hurt himself but told his wife the tale about being beaten up and robbed and it was her that started the pay pal collection and when it got out of hand he was just to embarrassed to tell her, and everyone else the truth !

Thats just what I heard, what the truth is , is anyones guess !

Cheers.

[mackay 3,330]

A few of us fell for it, me included. When I read he had difficulty eating and was basically eating through a straw I sent him a party sized bag of coloured straws to cheer him up.

[steve66 3,402]

12 hours ago, low plains drifter said:

We couldn't even dream about binoculars

2 toilet roll tubes glued together when i was a kid 

[mackem 26,264]

2 hours ago, kanny said:

 

Andy Kelly's Cunning Ballad

 

 

 

(Verse 1) In a small town, lived a man named Andy Kelly, A silver tongue, a master of deception, they'd tell me. With charm and wit, he spun his web so sly, He wove a tale of woe that made you sigh.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Verse 2) He'd roam the streets, with his faithful hound in tow, A sorry sight, a mutt that seemed to have lost its glow. With tearful eyes, he'd tell passersby his plight, "How can I live without my dog's bark so bright?"

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Verse 3) The townsfolk fell for his sob story each day, Believed his lies, their sympathy led them to pay. He'd collect their coins, saying it's for a cure, While all along, his deception would endure.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Bridge) But the truth has a way of coming to light, And Andy's deceit would soon take flight. A local detective, wise and keen, Uncovered the ruse, the deceptive scene.

(Verse 4) The townsfolk learned of Andy's cunning game, Their generosity taken, their hearts inflamed. In anger and sorrow, they rallied as one, To bring justice to this crafty, cunning con.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Verse 5) Before the judge, Andy stood to defend, His web of lies starting to rapidly descend. No longer would he weave his tales of woe, For justice had caught up, it was time to go.

(Chorus) Oh, Andy Kelly, the cunning conman, they say, With his dog that lost its bark, he led the way. He played with hearts, emotions he'd provoke, Taking money and binoculars, a crafty bloke.

(Outro) And so, the tale of Andy Kelly's deceit, A lesson learned, a cautionary beat. Beware the words of those who play pretend, For truth and honesty, in the end, transcend.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I imagine that sung vibrato in a medieval court while playing a lute.

[kanny 20,504]

7 minutes ago, mackem said:

I imagine that sung vibrato in a medieval court while playing a lute.

Excellent! ...that was the vibe I was going for  

[mackem 26,264]

3 minutes ago, kanny said:

Excellent! ...that was the vibe I was going for  

I actually sang it in my head in vibrato (sans lute of course) I imagined the lyrics echoing around the great hall in Hampton Court and Henry 8’th clapping but wondering who Andy Kelly was and what were binoculars?

[forest of dean redneck 11,559]

Wonder if he’s related to Ned Kelly ??

[mackem 26,264]

3 minutes ago, forest of dean redneck said:

Wonder if he’s related to Ned Kelly ??

At least Ned Kelly had the grace to wear a mask (tin helmet) when relieving folks of their cash.