Why I Dont Fish

[smithie 2,443]

dont like fishing.. i tried it for a summer and its shit, and heres why i thinks so.

i was about 10/11/12 i forget the exact age and it was the big holidays, yep you guessed it, 6 weeks of school and the sun was shinning. i had a cousin who lived on the hill in a little place called sowerby and i had been spending a lot of time there at this point in my life. some c**t had taken him fishing for a day and he decided to share his pearls of wisdom with me. problem was he knew fook all, maybe not even that much.

anyhow his old man had spoken to mi mam and said do you think your lad might want do do a spot of down river ryburn wi my lad. it was the big hols and all of a sudden she did not need to find a baby sitter i could go to mi uncles for 3/4 days at a time. with that it mind im sure she said something along the lines of " oh yes he will love that". she was ohhh so wrong.

uncle worked on the busses so i was told what bus to get and he met me in the bus station when i got off my bus and put me on another telling the driver " this is the sister lad, teo of bus at top of the hill near council estate. my brother will be waiting at the stop for him". i got on the big bus on my own with a big grin on my face like i was king of the bus cos i didn't have to pay, dragging what i was told is a ledger rod and a whicker basket full of bits i had been given and some i stole from the fishing tackle shop in preperation for my summer on the bank.

getting to mi uncles john was straight in to mi wicker basket looking at the float and weights etc as though it was his christmas and then telling me well go as soon as ive had some dinner.

uncle nobhead dropped us off close by the river, leaving a short walk to drag the basket i had already taken a dislike to. john told me were to put mi stuff and set the rod up for me. what a palaver it turned out to be. teaching me how to cast was nightmare and i was struggling. i dont remember getting hooks stuck in me although i expect it will of happenned but what i do remmember is getting the line caught in trees above me and casting too far and clearing the bank and landing the float and hook on the other side of the bank in the kitchen and bathroom company grounds were in years to come i would one day work.

after time i got the hook in the water and sat on my basket waiting and waiting for something to happen with john doingpritty much the same. it went on like this for a week or so and i had to go home but it was not long before uncle nobhead was back on the phone asking if i was for fishing some more wi john.. " oh yes he will love that"

next time we went there was a chap sat on the bank, he just looked at us and give a little nod of his head as we walked by. i went straight to the spot i was in before and carried on putting the line in and out of the water practicing my cast. i dont know what i was expecting but fishing was not what i had thought it might be.... then it happened... i saw john looking at the guy with intrest. he was reeling something in and i remember the man to be happy and i was feeling a bit of excitment for fishing all of a sudden. now im working from memory and i remember the man putting the fish on the bank and hitting it with a kosh. i think it might have been about 9 inch to 12 inch long and john told me it was a trout. he mentioned brown trout and rainbow trout but i honestly think he knew nothing..

with the first bit of fishing action fresh in my mind i was keen to go back and try catch me one of these fine fish. it was not happening although i did get something on my hook i never landed a thing all summer and the holiday were running out. im sure they might of been a week or so left and i had had to stay at john's house again so my uncle could baby sit me. so the inevitable happened again, yep you guessed it i was sat on the wicker basket on that bank yet again..

ONLY THIS TIME I CAUGHT it was huge, mi rod was bent in half and my skinny arms were struggling to bring in the river monster. it felt like an age winding the reel in and john running up and down the f***ing bank like a your pup barking his instruction and grabbing for the never used landing net.. then it happend i began to lift my catch out of the water and i had caught a 1980's burgandy bath tub . the line snapped and the tub went back under and i was gutted. that was my summer done and my fishing. never fished since although have come close to having ago 1 time.

6/8 years later i found myself working at the kitchen/bathroom factory for a while and it was while i worked there i was told that once upon a time bath tubs used to be floated down the river to the weir as a way of getting them out of the factory without getting caught.. then sold on

[moxy 617]

:laugh:

[air gun ant 1,666]

LOL ;)I remember going years without catching f**k all, then all of a sudden it clicked! I Stop listening to dad, coz he knows naff all bout fishing lol but him and my mum sat out in bloody snow storms with me fishing when I was a kid bless em

[Rimfireboy! 1,463]

Best write up I've read for ages, thanks for sharing smithie.

[smithie 2,443]

Best write up I've read for ages, thanks for sharing smithie.

I got 2 more worth a peep at in long net section

[BIGLURKS 874]

Good read that it's a nice change when I find these kinda threads

[bell 3,606]

Uncle nob head lol

 

Bell

[bobcullen79 1,495]

Nice write up Smithie. Its a timeless classic told every summer, with varying endings

I tell the winter version of going up the leeds and liverpool canal on every boxing day with 3 brothers and after smashing a hole in the ice to test out the new kit we got. It always ended in a cold blank, with the two twins threatening to kick shit out of each other and throw each others gear in... Oh the good old days..

[ratbuster 807]

Great story ! thanks for sharing

Edited October 26, 2014 by ratbuster

[walshie 2,804]

Uncle nobhead.

 

If you do decide to go fishing in the future smithie, and need some tips, pm bobcullen79 and i'll pass some onto him.

[smithie 2,443]

good of you to help out walshie.. bob will be happy with the help

 

unfortunatly my fishing days are well behind me now and i like my fish to be in batter

[northern lad 2,292]

Enjoyed that Smithie,brought back some memories that Uncle Nobhead

[NEWKID 27,353]

Nice one Smithie, enjoyed that tale..

[bobcullen79 1,495]

Uncle nobhead.

 

If you do decide to go fishing in the future smithie, and need some tips, pm bobcullen79 and i'll pass some onto him.

I didnt realize you had a direct line to Archie..