elisderyn 496 Posted October 16, 2007 Report Share Posted October 16, 2007 Dave the hen... Dave came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep. He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white Robe. "Who the hell are you?" demanded Dave, "and what are you doing in my bedroom?" The mysterious man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter." Dave was stunned "You mean I'm dead!?!! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family. . . you've got to send me back straight away." Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen." Dave was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground. This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, how are you enjoying your first day here?" It's not so bad" replies Dave, "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode." You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid an egg before?" > > > > > >"Never!" replies Dave. > > > "Well just relax and let it happen" > > > > > > So he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops > >out > > >from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and > >his > > >emotions got the better of him as he experienced > > >motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling > >of > > >happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a > >hen > > >was the best thing that ever happened to him . . . Ever!!! > > > > > >The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he > >felt > > >an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife > >shouting... > > > > > > > > > > > >"Dave, wake up you drunken b@stard, you've sh*t the bed." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mad al 146 Posted October 16, 2007 Report Share Posted October 16, 2007 :clapper: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
flyer 0 Posted October 16, 2007 Report Share Posted October 16, 2007 good one mate very funny Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ferretman22 1 Posted October 16, 2007 Report Share Posted October 16, 2007 that sick, but very funny Quote Link to post Share on other sites
greatwhitehunter 47 Posted October 16, 2007 Report Share Posted October 16, 2007 haha! bloody brilliant the lads in school will love that one! :notworthy:The Hunting Life - Worldwide Fieldsports GuidelinesHelp Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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