Children's Awkward Questions.

[marshman 7,758]

My daughter asked me, dad , what does coming out mean ? I said ..." Well it's when a gay person decides they've had enough of pretending their not gay. They come out , which symbolises ones self and freedom from society's guidelines . It's a sign of how far humans are becoming more and more open minded of others views and differences .... Unless your black when it usually means parole ?.

[The one 8,511]

[RossM 8,149]

:laugh:

 

There was a thing on the radio this morning of what kids say to embarrass you, someone phoned in saying their daughter answered the door and said "mummy can't come to the door, she's in the toilet doing a jobby" wee b*****d!

[ZacB 114]

Brings back memories........

On a journey home from school I had "what's a dildo dad?"

 

As a responsible father type I answered "ask your mother when we get I home son"......

[the_stig 6,614]

remember one of mine asking a paki why she stuck a dot on her head ... took my mates grandson out with the lurcher when we got back his grandma said did you enjoy it yeah he said we saw loads of c**ts (missed rabbits)

[RossM 8,149]

My old boy years ago was in the bath and one of my wee sisters was banging the door saying she needed a poo, (at that age when they say anything) he asked if it could wait but she said no, so he let her in saying if she doesn't do the toilet he'd smack her arse. After about 5 minutes he asked "have you done your poo?" To which my wee sister looked down the pan and replied "no I've just done a fag instead" he'd been smoking when running the bath and flicked the butt down the pan

[mushroom 13,261]

Got on a bus once in Blackpool when my eldest was 3. There was a bloody tranny driving the bus, made up to the nines with long blonde hair, Adam's apple and hands like shit shovels

 

The daughter turns round and says "dad why is that man dressed like a woman" :laugh:

[gnasher16 30,471]

" Dad why has Mum chucked you out again ".........................is never an easy one

[Themoocher 231]

Dad was does Homosexual mean,

 

Remba my wee cousin was bout 8 or 9 and use watch that Family guy.

f**k me the things he use to ask my auld gran lol

[Outlaw Pete 2,224]

I think I probably got this off of here anyway. But .....

 

 

Still cracks me up!

 

[The Seeker 3,048]

I once went into a battery specialist to purchase a car battery, it was only a small shop, Im in there with my then 3 year old son, in walks this bloke with long shoulder length hair and about 25 stone.

 

So my son does what any self respecting child would do in that situation. pointed his finger and said "dad look at that fat lady" of course I pretended not to hear him so he made sure I did by carrying on pointing and going "dad, dad, dad, dad look at that fat lady, shes a fat lady shes a fat lady"

 

I looked at him and rolled my eyes in the best "kids huh" expression I could pull but he wasnt best pleased.

[day worker 296]

I was stood in a queue in the local shop when in walks a hells angel type! He must have been 7ft tall and about 30 stone and was probably able to snap me like a twig! Anyway my daughter pipes up and loudly says "wow daddy isn't that man fat"! I couldn't get out of there fast enough!

[Lab 10,979]

Remember my Dad telling me when I was young we were out at a restaurant and a dwarf walked in and I got all excited, pointing and shouting "Look at the wee man, look at the wee man!!"

 

If that happens to me I will f***ing die.....?

[the_stig 6,614]

" Dad why has Mum chucked you out again ".........................is never an easy one

i`ve had why did you sleep in the shed -----------------------again

[RubyTex 1,957]

I've been told that after my first ever rail journey, well, that I could talk and walk on! I was asked by my grandma how my day out went. Apparently my answer finished with "and those trains go f***ing fast!" lol lol

 

Must have only been about 3 or 4.