Ye *know* You're F**ked When .....

[Outlaw Pete 2,224]

I had an appointment for an eye test, yesterday. That mean't I had to go to the Big Town.

 

(With that, I took a deep breath. Tucked my dickla in. Sipped my drink. Scratched my head. All diversionary tactics. Taking my mind off even just the Thought of such a thing)

 

Now, when I say " Big Town ", I mean big, as compared to my local, two hundred yard 'High Street'. Big town has several streets. (This is proving f**king hard for me, actually)

 

Steve, my taxi driver, pulled up dead opposite the opticians. And I stepped out of the motor. Into a nightmare!

 

It was too bright. There were way to many people, moving too fast. Traffic was seemingly screaming past me in a torrent. The big buildings were crowding in on me.

 

My mouth was arid. My heart pounding. My breath ragged. I So wanted to dive back into the familiar comfort of that motor.

 

As it was, I managed to dash across the road and through the door. Shaking and trying damn hard not to start screaming.

 

Happily, they sent me to sit on a sofa in a confined little waiting area. There I was feet from a plain wall in front of me and shielded by a wall to the street side. Comforted. Back in a little, quiet space.

 

Rest was fine. Nice young lady tested my sorrowful level of vision and la di da di dah. Steve was waiting. Head down. Deep breath. Dash. We were heading home.

 

What the F**k has all that got to do with bird keeping ....?

 

I'll tell ye; On the purely bird fora, I tend to get a fair bit of thinly disguised static, when I simply state the fact that I can't nip up or down to the nearest capital cities, to get birds or attend shows.

 

" Surely there must be trains where you live, Pete? " They sneer.

 

Yeah. Sure. There's a train stop about fifteen miles away. But, Pete doesn't want to be on that train. You wouldn't want me on it.

 

No one wants to be on the train when the guy suddenly slides off his seat onto the floor. And there curls up into a mewling, crying, shaking ball, until they come for him, in their white coats, and drag him away.

 

I have a Very well recorded disability. It's in my head, so I don't use a wheel chair. Body's fine. I'm f**ked from the neck up.

 

I know enough of the canary guys follow me here too. This just seemed the better place to get this off my chest. And I'm still suffering from yesterdays little outing, twenty four hours later, look.

 

Please, guys; Cut a man some f**king slack, eh?

 

Thankyou.

 

[socks 32,253]

Pete I know where your coming from I am still traumatised from last weeks journey from hell to the big smoke ......

[the_stig 6,614]

did ye need new specs pete ?...

[Outlaw Pete 2,224]

Last eye test was five years ago, mate. Completely f**ked since then. I was looking at this screen from arms length, back then. Now, it's elbow length, with the glasses I got then!

 

Must say, the girl was excellent. I openly explained to her that I read the net or else read birds rings. I'd took a ring with me. I said reading rings was the most important thing of all.

 

I can always blow the page size up. Or just put my nose to the screen. But, every year, when we put in for our new license, we have to sign a declaration that we reckon we're physically up to the job. Can't go on ringing if ye simply can't be sure what the f**k that number is.

 

So, bugger me if she didn't put me down for Two pairs! One for " Reading " (Rings) and the other for the computer.

 

Of course, being as I'm on the Medical Card, I'm 'eligible' for free lenses. But, I still have to go cap in hand to the govt. and ask for them. Then They decide if I can see or not.

 

And, of course, since our beloved leader said 'We're all in this together' and 'Tough decisions would have to be made'. Then promptly set about arse raping the sick and the poor left, right and centre ....? I'm far from out of the woods yet.

 

In fact, I may have just f**ked my head up and spent sixty quid in the process, all just to be told to f**k off by our beloved leaders agencies.

 

Nice.

 

[the_stig 6,614]

sounds like another trip into town to pick em up...

[Outlaw Pete 2,224]

Bollocks to That! Aside from the fact that that's a thirty quid trip into hell ....? No. I'll stick Steve a tenner and ask him to just snatch them for me, next times he's down there. (Taxi's are always going there, of course)

 

Sick thing is; I was told I'd get a call to say they were ready and I could pick them up. But, that I should ignore that and wait till I got a letter from our beloved leaders people, saying they'd cover them.

 

So; They could give me a knock back. Presumably meaning my glasses would get binned, just to f**king spite me?!

[the_stig 6,614]

Bollocks to That! Aside from the fact that that's a thirty quid trip into hell ....? No. I'll stick Steve a tenner and ask him to just snatch them for me, next times he's down there. (Taxi's are always going there, of course)

 

Sick thing is; I was told I'd get a call to say they were ready and I could pick them up. But, that I should ignore that and wait till I got a letter from our beloved leaders people, saying they'd cover them.

 

So; They could give me a knock back. Presumably meaning my glasses would get binned, just to f**king spite me?!

they have to fook about making sure they sit right on ye nose n ears ------ back to town ye go

[Outlaw Pete 2,224]

Nooooo!!! This place is Good! They fetched me four pairs of frames and had me try them. No input from themselves what ever. Just me deciding which I'd be happy to wear, in my own, natural position on my head.

 

One pair felt loose. Like they'd end up sliding off. Other pair pinched my skull! We all know the headache That causes! Two pairs felt sublime. They have my name on them.

 

Had to laugh; The girl asked me if I'd like to look at their range of frames. Or ..... (Being on the Medical Card ....?) I just laughed and told her straight:

 

" Look, sweetheart; I live Alone. With a bunch of Dogs. They don't care what my glasses look like. And I'm hardly looking to impress any chicks! The 'Clark Kent' stuff is fine by me! "

[Hot Meat 3,109]

Specs Ffs it's a handful a Valium you need Pete.... Seriously tho if that's genuinely how you feel I you get my respect, must be hard living like that. I hate towns but it's the folk I hate, take them out pic and I'd happily go to towns or city's lol my dislike for most folk is probs the reason I love being out all night rather than all day lol by th way, ye should have gone to spec savers lol

[delswal 3,819]

Nooooo!!! This place is Good! They fetched me four pairs of frames and had me try them. No input from themselves what ever. Just me deciding which I'd be happy to wear, in my own, natural position on my head.

 

One pair felt loose. Like they'd end up sliding off. Other pair pinched my skull! We all know the headache That causes! Two pairs felt sublime. They have my name on them.

 

Had to laugh; The girl asked me if I'd like to look at their range of frames. Or ..... (Being on the Medical Card ....?) I just laughed and told her straight:

 

" Look, sweetheart; I live Alone. With a bunch of Dogs. They don't care what my glasses look like. And I'm hardly looking to impress any chicks! The 'Clark Kent' stuff is fine by me! "

The 'Clark Kent' stuff is fine by me!………..you get the underpants to match pete

[norseman 424]

pete your first post made me think of brooks from shawshank when he got out

I have to read your posts a few times not because I need glasses but because to me you talk like the riddler

 

shows how intellectual I am (had to check the spelling for that)

[perthshire keeper 1,239]

you have my sympathy's pete!!! i cant be on with towns/shops for a whole host of other reasons thou...... the very thought of having to phone a taxie...after phoning a optician....then going to speak to them about some thing i know f**k all about after trying to converse with a cabbie

that makes my fecking palms sweaty and want to go and sit with the dogs or tune some mole traps

 

f**k that for a game of soldiers

[Frann 882]

I can relate too, not as bad as you sound Pete but give it a few years lol Like HM said though, its the crowds I have 'issues' with mostly. I used to have to get pi$$ed just to nip into Swansea (Thankfully im a bit better these days)

[Outlaw Pete 2,224]

Lads; The answer, in my case, is perfectly simple and a matter of medical record: I became 'Damaged Goods' some years ago. No fault of my own. Nothing I can do about it. Nothing a steady procession of Mental Health experts could do for me.

 

Had I lost a leg? Everyone would 'understand'. As it was? I lost part of my mind and it doesn't show, physically. So, everyone just assumes I'm a sad c***.

 

There's guys, on this very site, had known me, face to face, for Years before " The Incident ". I wonder what they'd think if they shared my company again now?

 

My own mother couldn't recognise what I'd become. F**k knows what my old mates would make of me.

 

But, there it is. I suffer a MEDICAL condition. I'm not just some bast@rd with a moody attitude. I'm not bemoaning my condition, or my lot.

 

I Am getting a little bit pissed off with constantly having to f**king explain myself. Or defend myself against people who know shit about me, calling me out as a moaner, or even some sort of f**king liar! As has just happened Again, this very evening, else where. Even since I made this original post!

 

I'm not trying to come across as some sort of self styled 'Mountain Man' type who'll run for the hills at the sight of another human being. I don't fancy myself a " Lone Wolf "

 

However, my psychiatric reports say what they say. Basically, that I'm f**ked. Hey ho. Ever onwards .....

[socks 32,253]

Pete who gives a fukc what other people think ... You have your own place ... You have your dogs ... You have your bird ringing ... You have fresh air to breath ... You have your freedom ... Don't let other people get under your skin mate ..........