Funny Ryms

[Wullz 408]

There was a young man from Dalguises

Who's balls were of different sizes

One was so small, it was no ball at all

And the other won serveral prizes

[baw 4,360]

There was a bloke called tomo

Who turned into a bit of a homo

His wife wanted a girly 3 some

And tomo to join in and see them

But he chose to go drinking on his lonesome

[Caprelous 217]

There was a plumber from Dundee

Plumbing a girl by the sea

The girl cried stop for theres someone a coming

The plumber a plumbing said if anyones coming its me

 

There was a lass from West Houghton

Who could fart like a 500 Norton

To make up for that she had a large twat

and her tits were one long one and short un

 

 

Was a chap from Kent whos knob was all twisted and bent

To save all the trouble be put it in double

and instead of coming he went

[talt 878]

There was a young girl from Peru,

who filled up her fanny with glue,

she said with a grin

they pay to get in

they can pay to get out again too!!

[Astanley 11,568]

The Hunting Life

 

 

 

 

Some members drink far too much beer

some are undoubtedly queer

A lot are incredibly thick

And Baw is a big Scottish prick

 

 

 

Some members don't know when to quit

some talk a great deal of shit

A lot like to think they can hunt

And Baw is a big Scottish Kunt

 

 

 

Some members will argue the toss

some mods like to think theyre the boss

A lot seem to think they can fight

And Baw is a wee Scottish shite

 

 

Some members , they come and they go

Like stewie and brickie and co

A lot ( fuk knows how ) they have lasted

And Baw is a big Scottish Bastid

[baw 4,360]

The Hunting Life

 

 

 

 

Some members drink far too much beer

some are undoubtedly queer

A lot are incredibly thick

And Baw is a big Scottish prick

 

 

 

Some members don't know when to quit

some talk a great deal of shit

A lot like to think they can hunt

And Baw is a big Scottish Kunt

 

 

 

Some members will argue the toss

some mods like to think theyre the boss

A lot seem to think they can fight

And Baw is a wee Scottish shite

 

 

Some members , they come and they go

Like stewie and brickie and co

A lot ( fuk knows how ) they have lasted

And Baw is a big Scottish Bastid

different f***ing class I knew as soon as I seem your name it would be quality :notworthy:

[MoChara 1,632]

here was a young whore from Kilkenny,
Who charged two fucks for a penny,
For half of that sum,
You could bugger her bum,
An economy practised by many

[MoChara 1,632]

Got sent this one cause of where im from -

 

County Down

A young lass from old County Down
Was arrested for painting the town.
“It just got in me head
to go paint the town red.”
Which she did in her night-sleeping gown.

[MoChara 1,632]

Belfast -

 

There was a young fellow from Belfast,

That I wanted so badly to tell fast,

Not to climb up the stair,

As the top step was air.

And that’s why the young fellow fell fast.

 

 

Leeds -

 

There once was a man from Leeds,

who swallowed a packet of seeds,
within half an hour,
his dick was a flower,
and his balls were all covered with weeds.

 

 

There was a young girl named Denise
Who’s pubes hung down to her knees
The crabs got together
To knit her a sweater
So in winter her twat wouldn’t freeze.

[baw 4,360]

Trust you to lower the tone mo

[MoChara 1,632]

[joe54 83]

good uns

[bwfc 164]

little druggy sat in her buggy smoking a joint of weed along came a spider who sat down beside her and sold her a kilo of speed

 

 

jack and Jill went up the hill

To go and get a sorter

Jack came down with half an ounce

and Jill came down with a quarter.

[WILF 46,788]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I'm a dyslexic

 

Ahshdhj dudhhd eudhehsisb !!

[Silversnake 1,099]

Arse%ole, arse%ole, a soldier went to war

To pis#, to pis# two pistols by his side

F$ck you, f$ck you, for curiosity

To fight for the old c&nt, fight for the old c&nt, fight for the old country