Funny Ryms

[joe54 83]

as above lets here some ......................there once was a women from eliy who had a terrible feeling she layed on here back opened her crack and pissed all over the ceiling

[paulus 26]

little druggy sat in her buggy smoking a joint of weed along came a spider who sat down beside her and sold her a kilo of speed

[Hot Meat 3,109]

Once was a guy called joe

most folk would have deemed him slow

Joe was always on the go

trying to make some dough

but when poor joe felt low

he took to the drinking of bo

everybody laughed hey ho

when poor old joe let go

did poor joe make the toilet?????

 

Hell no.....

[squab 2,875]

arron coursing man was his name he went a bit insane,

at the lurcher show one day he decided to put them both away,

he hit socks with a left and hot meat with a right.

dusted off his hands and kissed them both goodnight.

[socks 32,253]

There was a young man named Arron who's ball bag was empty and barren

He picked a fight with spandex clad hot meat and then with good looking socks

They couldn't be arsed to slap him so beat fukc out of him using only their cocks ..........

[mushroom 13,174]

Lol feel the love :laugh:

 

Jingle Bells,

Batman smells,

Robin flew away,

Uncle Jimmy pulled my willy,

When the nurse was away,

Hey.

[paulus 26]

There once was a man named McSweeny
Who spilled some gin on his weenie
Just to be Couth
He added some Vermouth
And slipped his chick a Martini!

 

Old mother Hubbard,

Went to the cupboard,
To get her old dog a bone.
When she bent over,
Rover took over,
And gave her a bone of his own

 

Jack and Jill went up the hill

And planned to do some kissing
Jack made a pass,
and grabbed her ass
And now two of his teeth are missing.

 

There once was a fellow named Perkin

Who always was jerkin' his gherkin
His mother said, "Perkin,
Stop jerkin' your gherkin
Your gherkin's for ferkin' not jerkin'."

 

There once was a plumber from Leigh,

Who was plumbing his maid by the sea,
Said she, "Please stop plumbing,
I think someone's coming!"
Said he, "Yes I know love, it's me."

[joe54 83]

there once was a women who swallowed a explosive pill she found her c**t in north karliner and her tits in a tree in brazil

[Brewman 1,192]

There was a man from Kildare

Who was fcuking a girl on the stair

The banister broke

So he doubled his stroke

And finished here off in the air

 

So there

[paulf 820]

I went for a walk with my uncle jim

somebody threw a tomato at him

tomatos don't hurt when they come in there skin

but this f****r did it came in a tin ...

[Tiercel 6,986]

The cuckoo sits in the tall green grass,

It's wings folded tightly,

It's beak up it's ass.

 

Now in this position,

it can only say twit,

for it's hard to say cuckoo,

with a beak full of shit.

 

TC

[lanesra 3,994]

The Hunting-Life Is A Strange Place To View

On Dogs & Ferrets The Fat We Do Chew

Some are Real Stupid & Some Are So Vain

And Some Like Christain Keep Changing There Name

Delete Me Some Say When There Dummy Slips Out

Poor Hot Meat & Socks Are Getting A Clout

The Cockneys Are Here And We All Love There Twang

Poor Hot Meat & Socks Are Getting A Bang

Now I'll Put The Jokes All Too 1 Side

Get On The Hunting-Life And Just Enjoy The Ride !!

Edited December 10, 2013 by lanesra

[foxshooter69 6]

Little miss muffett sat on a tuffet,

Knickers all tattered and torn,

It wasn't a spider who sat down beside her,

But little boy blue with the horn.

[Blackbriar 8,569]

On the chest of a barmaid in Sale,

Were tattooed the prices of ale.

And on her behind,

For the sake of the blind,

Was the same information in Braille !

 

 

 

There once was a man from Nantucket,

Whose wife had a .......................maybe not !

[Taggy123 59]

Up above the streets and houses, bungles flying high, opens up his hairy arse and shits in jeffries eye.