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Chat Up Lines Through The Ages


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f**k me there are some smooth b*****ds on here :icon_eek::whistling:

are you taking notes Tarkers, might go some way to helping you out of your current predicament? :laugh:

 

 

Virginity is only temporary. It just seems to have gone on a long time in Tarker's case. :laugh: More to come too.

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True story this. i was working on a building site doing council refurbishments, and there was a gorgeous 18 year old with long dark hair and cracking figure. One day i walked up to her and said i have

I prefer to use a picture of someone else's cock to keep them interested.

Or a pump come to think of it lol

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Take an ice-cube from the young lady's drink and throw it on the floor...... "Well, that's the ice broken - any chance of a f**k?" :D

 

Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight !! :D

Touch my drink and id fooking kill you :D i know where they keep the baseball bats in my local :D

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Been a VERY long time since my dating days but a firm favourite used to be "Look, lets stop f***ing about, get out of here and get amongst it"...........it seemed to work very well indeed in them days

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Been a VERY long time since my dating days but a firm favourite used to be "Look, lets stop f*****g about, get out of here and get amongst it"...........it seemed to work very well indeed in them days

 

Ahhh. Those were the days. "Do you come here often?" :laugh::laugh:

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Was in an Idian years back with a couple of sorts who me and a mate had pulled in some shitty nightclub, anyway we sat there and talked shit for a while as you do and the waiter rocked up with big steaming bowls of curry

 

These birds were rattling on about some shit as birds do and I started to get the f*****g ache listening to their bollocks (this was in my drinking days)........so anyway, I get fed up and say "Look, are we gonna be doing some f*****g tonight or what?".............they look all shocked and offended and start to mouth off so I said "well in that case, shut the f**k up for fucks sake" and without really thinking I pick up all the currys on the table and pour them over these two tarts heads!! :icon_eek:

 

They were covered and I mean covered........the pakis all rush over so I start turning tables over and generally telling everyone to f**k off :blink:

 

Needless to say, that was the end of the evening and one of the reasons I have not drunk for nearly 20 years!! lol

 

Dont try this at home lads! :laugh:

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