LaraCroft 863 Posted March 20, 2013 Report Share Posted March 20, 2013 Happy birthday for friday Mrs Whippet - hope you have a superb day with your family 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Paid 935 Posted March 20, 2013 Report Share Posted March 20, 2013 I live in a tied cottage, so trying to decide what to do for the future, love the job and house, but now with 3 boys, thinking a lot more about the future than i ever have before, and need some bricks, mortar and land of my own. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NEWKID 27,673 Posted March 20, 2013 Report Share Posted March 20, 2013 I'm sorry to make this about you, but my thoughts are with you and yours mate.... The decisions your making now are incomparable to the average "hard" decisions... All your decision are based on your love for your wife and kids in time you'll realise that they were right, for that reason alone..... I sincerely wish you and your lads all the best mate 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
darbo 4,776 Posted March 20, 2013 Report Share Posted March 20, 2013 I wish your wife a happy birthday. i wish you and your family all the good luck for the future. some decisions are very very hard to make in life such as your own. atb Darbo. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tiercel 6,986 Posted March 20, 2013 Report Share Posted March 20, 2013 (edited) It's hard not to be drawn in to your circumstances Whippet. Most of what has been stated is not sympathy, but people trying to empathize with you. The problem with this thread is you have set the bar so high. Every persons little decisions that at the time may seem important to them, seem trivial compared to the decisions you have had to make, I know mine are. There are not many people who have been in the same situation as yourself, yet there are some that have been in worse. (switching off life support etc) For what it's worth I feel whatever the decision you made, was in the best intrests of your wife and your children. I know you said this thread was not about you, But, it cannot be anything but, with the revelations you have disclosed. TC Edited March 21, 2013 by tiercel 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GaZMaN888 68 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 My hardest decision is whether to get out of bed every Monday and drag my ar*e to whatever sh*t hole part of the country I happen to be working in that particular week knowing that I won't see my 6 month old daughter til the Friday. It kills me watching the videos the wife sends me because I just want to be there. GaZ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lanesra 3,994 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 You and Your Family's Struggling To Make Decisions Which You's Think Are The Best Is Normal In These Circumstance's , My Advice Is Speak to The Professionals , Those Who Run Hospice And Go With There Opinion As They Deal With These Situations Everyday . Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rake aboot 4,936 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 No real heartbreaker decisions as of yet. I`ve always been a bit straight about when to put my dogs down etc, No f***ing about. If they need it they get it, kills me when I do it but I feel fine knowing I`m doing the right thing (last dog tormented me for months after, cause he was only 4) I can`t imagine what Whippets going through, and I hope I never find out, but whatever decision you make will be based on YOUR knowledge of your family,,,,which makes whatever YOU decide, the best decision. I don`t believe in God, so I don`t imagine any of us have peace to look forward to, but I truely hope she has a peaceful time for whatever time she has. You say the family situation may stress her, well, fine,, leave her where she is being taken care off, and get her away out into the countryside as much as you can manage. Spend your time wisely mate, make it all count. ATB Rake Quote Link to post Share on other sites
henarchchar 64 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 my hardest decision well 2 where 1 not telling my wife that i had a biopsy done on my knee ( because whenshe did find out was she mad all this sharing and no secrets then tells me i was selfish never did understand how) 2 letting my sisters take over at my dads funeral even though they never spoke to him for 20 year s but it did givethem some peace ( also made me laugh because they thought he was loaded and he had fook all ) i know these are not in the same league but to me they seemed difficult Quote Link to post Share on other sites
whippet 99 2,613 Posted March 21, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 my hardest decision well 2 where 1 not telling my wife that i had a biopsy done on my knee ( because whenshe did find out was she mad all this sharing and no secrets then tells me i was selfish never did understand how) 2 letting my sisters take over at my dads funeral even though they never spoke to him for 20 year s but it did givethem some peace ( also made me laugh because they thought he was loaded and he had fook all ) i know these are not in the same league but to me they seemed difficult isnt it funny how family come out of the wood work at these times ................but they never see them through out there life and then start calling the shots ,..............makes me blood boil......... i mean i know shell me wife would want to be at home ,..................but after a long think it would probably be putting her through unwanted stress..........and make her more agitated............. last night lara croft sent me a pm about a personal decision she had to make in ....an emergency that would effect her for the rest of her life ......... my heart goes out to you and your husband..........some people have to make decisions in diar straights that effect them for the rest of there life..........all the best its a cruel world and you just dont know whats going to be chucked at you ,...............and then more shite gets chucked at you ,......keep going and fight it .... 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
baw 4,360 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 Well said whippet, heart goes out to you mate. My hardest decision was walking away from my daughter, ending the charade called a relationship with the ex. No where near yours but it was hard for me mate, still is. I do my bit financially though and see her as much as I can but its dented our relationship and that hurts. But as you say, you get on with it. 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
paulus 26 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 my hardest decision well 2 where 1 not telling my wife that i had a biopsy done on my knee ( because whenshe did find out was she mad all this sharing and no secrets then tells me i was selfish never did understand how) 2 letting my sisters take over at my dads funeral even though they never spoke to him for 20 year s but it did givethem some peace ( also made me laugh because they thought he was loaded and he had fook all ) i know these are not in the same league but to me they seemed difficult isnt it funny how family come out of the wood work at these times ................but they never see them through out there life and then start calling the shots ,..............makes me blood boil......... i mean i know shell me wife would want to be at home ,..................but after a long think it would probably be putting her through unwanted stress..........and make her more agitated............. last night lara croft sent me a pm about a personal decision she had to make in ....an emergency that would effect her for the rest of her life ......... my heart goes out to you and your husband..........some people have to make decisions in diar straights that effect them for the rest of there life..........all the best its a cruel world and you just dont know whats going to be chucked at you ,...............and then more shite gets chucked at you ,......keep going and fight it .... nothing a queer as family when theres money involved mate, ive done both with terminally ill family members, one we nursed at home untill the end. the other one was in a hospice, both were equally as bad, interfering family who thought they were helping even though they were clueless having been nowhere near when we could have done with the help. there is no clear choice, only the wishes of the person and how it will effect those caring and those left afterwards. For what its worth with youngsters about, i believe that the seperation between home and the hospice makes things easier for them to accept whats happening and home is a place of escape/safety. believe me if you think family interfere now wait untill the dust settles. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
johnny boy68 11,726 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 You have my upmost respect for having the balls to deal with this situation, I couldn't for one minute imagine the mess I'd be in. Good luck with whatever you decide mate. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lab 10,979 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 I know you dont want any sympathy mate so i'll just say chin up. The hardest desicion for me was a few years back when my Mum was seriously in in Hospital. Basically all the docs and surgeons were making it clear that there was a high possibility she wasnt going to pull through and she was only really getting helped along by the Life Support Machine. So i was asked to sign something to say when they thought the time was right or if my Mum was in anyway going to suffer then it was time to stop the machine..... ......Can only thank my lucky stars it never got to that, although closer than i ever wanted it too be........ She's one hardy b*****d!!... 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
haymin 2,465 Posted March 21, 2013 Report Share Posted March 21, 2013 Best wishes to you and your family whippet just be there for your wife and make her smile and spoil her I'm sure she deserves it all the very best to you's group hug ) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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