Guest bezza Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 Easy. Charge members of the public a tenner to punch, headbut or kick Osborne, Gove, Clegg Cameron etc. I would start off with Osborne:a Glasgow kiss delivered with speed power and accuracy. An uppercut starting from somewhere around my knees for Gove. A full bodied kick in the bollocks administered at running pace wearing steel toe caps for Cameron. A loud BOO! for Clegg to reduce him to tears. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
masmiffy 82 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 Be sure to read all the way to the end! Tax his land, Tax his bed, Tax the table At which he's fed. Tax his work, Tax his pay, He works for peanuts Anyway! Tax his cow, Tax his goat, Tax his pants, Tax his coat. Tax his tobacco, Tax his drink, Tax him if he Tries to think. Tax his car, Tax his gas, Find other ways To tax his ass. Tax all he has Then let him know That you won't be done Till he has no dough. When he screams and hollers; Then tax him some more, Tax him till He's good and sore. Then tax his coffin, Tax his grave, Tax the sod in Which he's laid. When he's gone, Do not relax, It's time to apply The inheritance tax. Accounts Receivable Tax Airline surcharge tax Airline Fuel Tax Airport Maintenance Tax Building Permit Tax Cigarette Tax Corporate Income Tax Goods and Services Tax (VAT) Death Tax Driving licence Tax Environmental Taxes Excise Taxes Income Tax Fishing License Tax Food License Tax Petrol Tax (too much per litre) Profit Tax Health Tax Inheritance Tax Interest Tax Heating Tax Lighting Tax Cooking Tax Alcohol Tax Luxury Taxes Marriage License Tax Private Medical Insurance Tax Mortgage Tax and his pension Personal Income Tax Property/Council Tax Prescription Tax Land Stamp Duty Tax Road Vehicle Tax Retail Sales Tax (VAT) Service Charge Tax What he buys and what he sells Telephone Tax Vehicle License Registration Tax Vehicle Sales Tax Water Tax Workers Compensation Tax Tax (VAT) on Tax. And Now they want a blooming Carbon Tax! STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY? Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago... & our nation was one of the most prosperous in the world. We had absolutely no national debt, had a large middle class, a huge Manufacturing base, and Mum stayed home to raise the kids. What in the Hell happened? Could it be the lying parasitic politicians wasting our money? Oh, and don't forget the relatively new bank charges. And we all know what we think of Bankers. I hope this goes around the UK at least 1000 times!!! YOU can help it get there! Politicians ingenuity in finding new taxable areas is in equal Proportion to their inability to use/waste/spend our "stolen" money Wisely and sensibly. 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
masmiffy 82 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 And another Subject: Letter to Mr Cameron - Brilliant a must read Dear Mr Cameron, Please find below our suggestion for fixing the UK's economy. Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan. You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan: There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1 million each severance for early retirement with the following stipulations: 1) They MUST retire - Ten million job openings - unemployment fixed 2) They MUST buy a new British car - Ten million cars ordered - Car Industry fixed 3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed 4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university - Crime rate fixed 5) They MUST buy £100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week ..... And there's your money back in duty/tax etc It can't get any easier than that! P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you know. Also..... Let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home. This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks. They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of paying it out. They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance. Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them. A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and snacks to their cell. They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose. They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counselling, pool and education. Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be free, on request. Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard, with gardens. Each senior could have a PC a TV radio and daily phone calls. There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to. The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised. Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week. Live in a tiny room and pay £600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out. Think about this (more points of contention): COWS Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Appleby almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the county of Cumbria? And, they even tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 125,000 illegal immigrants wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow. Also; Think about this ... If you don't want to forward this for fear of offending someone -- YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM! It is time for us grumpy old folk of Britain to speak up! 9 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
trappa 518 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 Everything is delivered by diesel, absolutely everything - even petrol. Labour put fuel in with the sin taxes alongside cigarettes and alcohol. Price of everything goes up. Its Blair and Brown who want a feckin good kicking not cameron. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nik_B 3,790 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 I don't get it. It wasn't osbourne or any of them lot that got us in this shitty mess it was Labour. You should be charging to punch Brown, Blair and Darling in the head. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 Everything is delivered by diesel, absolutely everything - even petrol. Labour put fuel in with the sin taxes alongside cigarettes and alcohol. Price of everything goes up. Its Blair and Brown who want a feckin good kicking not cameron. Cameron and the shower we have in now ain't doing any better.. Our deficit is widening and government borrowing is still increasing. Cuts and austerity aren't making any difference apart from making certain sections even more well off... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nik_B 3,790 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 We're still a lot better off than nearly every other country in Europe and there are signs our economy is starting to grow a little Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ribb 15 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 simple it cant be done and will never be done Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted September 17, 2012 Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 We're still a lot better off than nearly every other country in Europe and there are signs our economy is starting to grow a little That's only because we're not in the euro... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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