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ok ok i now my jokes pretty shit well vert shit but i put this up to see what every ones elses jokes are and some one told me it so didnt now it was in a film

Edited by hugo1
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I'd hate to read your worst joke!!

Paddy goes for a job interview at a chemical factory the manager asks "Have u worked with chemicals before?" "Yes!" Paddy replies.   The manager asks "Can you tell me what nitrate is?"   Paddy

Heres one   A family go into visit their Granda in hospital and the doctor tells them ,there is nothing more we can do for him so we are stopping all medicine .   and while they are there a nurse

ok ok i now my jokes pretty shit well vert shit but i put this up to see what every ones elses jokes are and some one told me it saw didnt now it was in a film

Edited by tb25
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Heres one

 

A family go into visit their Granda in hospital and the doctor tells them ,there is nothing more we can do for him so we are stopping all medicine .

 

and while they are there a nurse comes and starts giving him a couple of tablets,and the family say we thought he is not get anymore medicine?

 

the nurse yeah thats right ,this is viagra.

 

the family say ,well why is he getting that?

 

and the nurse say's

 

to stop him falling out of the bed :laugh:

Edited by lurcher330
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Guest thebigdog

Now why did you not say Dara O'briain cause he's a fat useless Irish c**t as well............... :laugh:

 

go f**k your sel ya ginger, irn bru drinking, skirt wearing fairy.......... :laugh:

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Heres one

 

A family go into visit their Granda in hospital and the doctor tells them ,there is nothing more we can do for him so we are stopping all medicine .

 

and while they are a nurse comes and starts giving him a couple of tablets,and the family say we thought he is not get anymore medicine?

 

the nurse yeah thats right ,this is viagra.

 

the family say ,well why is he getting that?

 

and the nurse say's

 

to stop him falling out of the bed :laugh:

:huh:

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Be on your guard just had a warning from the police about keys. We are being warned about 4 keys that can open 87% of cars and 99% of houses. This is not a joke, the keys you need to be aware of are Dar-keys, Pak-keys, Pie-keys and Jun-keys

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I was at a strip club last night and I walked past this fat bird dancing on a table..I said to her f*****g amazing legs!..she turned and said thanks! Do you really think so? I said definitely most tables would have collapsed by now...

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Paddy goes for a job interview at a chemical factory the manager asks "Have u worked with chemicals before?"

"Yes!" Paddy replies.

 

The manager asks "Can you tell me what nitrate is?"

 

Paddy replies "I'm hoping it's Double Time!''

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Mum cleanin her 12yr old sons bedroom finds a load of serious bondage gear and fetish mags.

She asks her husband

"What do I do?"

Hubby "I'm not sure, but I wouldn't spank him"! X

this thread is making me depressed! :cray::laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

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Paddy goes for a job interview at a chemical factory the manager asks "Have u worked with chemicals before?"

"Yes!" Paddy replies.

 

The manager asks "Can you tell me what nitrate is?"

 

Paddy replies "I'm hoping it's Double Time!''

brilliant!!!! :laugh: :laugh:

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