WILF 48,259 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 I used to work in a restaurant in the town and one saturday night the assistant manager was drunk out his mind and tried it on with my ex and then tried to start a fight with me when i told him to f**k off!! so next day he is all sorry but im still pissed off as i can tell he never meant it. he rings up the kitchen asking me to send him down a roast dinner with extra yorkshire puddings on. they were decent sized yorkshire puddings infact just the perfect size to cup my balls in best bit was he brought me a drink that night to say thanks for putting them on his plate Bollocks !! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bosun11 537 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 This, when I think of it always makes me smile... When I was younger and working as a Lifeguard, I used to have a boss that was as camp as fecking Christmas, looked like an effeminate John Pertwee. Thing was, it was all front, he'd have women as fast as you could shove 'em under him..! The best bit about him was that he was a complete feind..! He always made sure we took on young hot female lifeguards for the summer, which made us well happy BUT from the moment they started he'd have 'em under his wing, propper little bosses pet and they'd do feck all work and you'd end up doing their share... Now they fecking loved him, such a nice man, asking all about their familys and such idle chit chat as they spent their days glued to his side. After a few weeks of such treatment the boss would play a little trick, he would bring in a pair of his wifes (yep he did have a Mrs but wouldn't tell many!) knickers and get himself a Mars bar from the vending, chew it all up and spit and smear it all over the crotch, making it look 'real good'..! So you'd be standing on the pool with 'little Miss do feck all' and she's telling you how lovely the boss is, just 'the' best boss anyone could have... Suddenly, he'd appear from the changing rooms, face like thunder and holding said 'draws' at arms length in front of him... "Filthy bitches.."!! He'd exclaime, "Filthy fecking bitches in this building..!!!" Now little Miss had never heard him swear, let alone raise his voice enraged, she was well shocked and he'd march right up to her, draws held out, cursing and swearing... "Just fecking look at that..!! Look what filth we have to put up with in here.." Just as he got right up, he momentarily flash the knickers contents, just to show what he was so mad about. She sees it, just for a split second, just before he pulls 'em to his face and starts devouring the contents, like a fecking nutter, he's licking and moaning and smearing it all over his face, in fecking shit ecstasy...!! Well, I've seen 'em puke, faint, run and a mixture of all three, he really knew how to play a waiting game and how to get 'em every time and the fecker would do it to some poor cow every year... Fecking genious...!! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PlasticJock 539 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 I like carefully placing cadburys chocolate buttons between my wife's arse cheeks while she's asleep, then seeing if she says anything in the morning 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dean Isnt A Tindle 20 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 back in the last yr of comp, we used to house party at this gals house nearly everyweek end, everyone used togo through her, her parents were the 'posh, 'my daughter is great, respectable and wouldnt do anything untoward' kind, we would all bang her in her mam and dads bed and hoy the used johnnys under the bed! i can remember the day she came into school and went wild with everone that used to go to hers, it had only been a a good few months untill her rent has found the stash! haha she never spoke to us lot for the rest of that yr! that makes me laugh, she was a belta lass aswell! might see if shes on facebook hahahaha Quote Link to post Share on other sites
darkie 143 Posted March 13, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 when i was at blacksmith college a young norwegian girl had made a chastity belt.She was very talented and the belt was a work of art ,fire welded and rivveted joints and a hand made padlock ,the inside was lined with red velvet.beutifull .until some kid rubbed a mars bar all over the crotch.she went mad and there was hell to pay Quote Link to post Share on other sites
stewie 3,387 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 This, when I think of it always makes me smile... When I was younger and working as a Lifeguard, I used to have a boss that was as camp as fecking Christmas, looked like an effeminate John Pertwee. Thing was, it was all front, he'd have women as fast as you could shove 'em under him..! The best bit about him was that he was a complete feind..! He always made sure we took on young hot female lifeguards for the summer, which made us well happy BUT from the moment they started he'd have 'em under his wing, propper little bosses pet and they'd do feck all work and you'd end up doing their share... Now they fecking loved him, such a nice man, asking all about their familys and such idle chit chat as they spent their days glued to his side. After a few weeks of such treatment the boss would play a little trick, he would bring in a pair of his wifes (yep he did have a Mrs but wouldn't tell many!) knickers and get himself a Mars bar from the vending, chew it all up and spit and smear it all over the crotch, making it look 'real good'..! So you'd be standing on the pool with 'little Miss do feck all' and she's telling you how lovely the boss is, just 'the' best boss anyone could have... Suddenly, he'd appear from the changing rooms, face like thunder and holding said 'draws' at arms length in front of him... "Filthy bitches.."!! He'd exclaime, "Filthy fecking bitches in this building..!!!" Now little Miss had never heard him swear, let alone raise his voice enraged, she was well shocked and he'd march right up to her, draws held out, cursing and swearing... "Just fecking look at that..!! Look what filth we have to put up with in here.." Just as he got right up, he momentarily flash the knickers contents, just to show what he was so mad about. She sees it, just for a split second, just before he pulls 'em to his face and starts devouring the contents, like a fecking nutter, he's licking and moaning and smearing it all over his face, in fecking shit ecstasy...!! Well, I've seen 'em puke, faint, run and a mixture of all three, he really knew how to play a waiting game and how to get 'em every time and the fecker would do it to some poor cow every year... Fecking genious...!! you never saw "the hoff" do that on baywatch :icon_eek: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Duncan 802 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 I like carefully placing cadburys chocolate buttons between my wife's arse cheeks while she's asleep, then seeing if she says anything in the morning in a similar vein, I cured my 16 year old lad of that detestable fashion of having his boxers on display and jeans hanging low. I used a brown felt tip marker and put a brown stripe on his laundered boxers at about where the top of the ass crack would be. Complete cure! Took him a few days to cotton on though Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Marvin 193 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 f**k its nights like this when a chunky bird would do,,, someone like that claire who used to be in steps, she has blossomed a fair bit, that and thecans ive supped are setting me off lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Marvin 193 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 reading this topic is gunna turn me lesbian..men really are f****d up in the head arent they ... Bet you been giggling reading them though :yes: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Duncan 802 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 from my childhood Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lunita 57 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 reading this topic is gunna turn me lesbian..men really are f****d up in the head arent they ... Bet you been giggling reading them though :yes: yeah some great revenge tips on here ... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
just jack 998 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 reading this topic is gunna turn me lesbian..men really are f****d up in the head arent they ... Bet you been giggling reading them though :yes: yeah some great revenge tips on here ... make sure you put the pics up when you turn the other "cheek" so to speak Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lunita 57 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 reading this topic is gunna turn me lesbian..men really are f****d up in the head arent they ... Bet you been giggling reading them though :yes: yeah some great revenge tips on here ... make sure you put the pics up when you turn the other "cheek" so to speak ok keep your inbox empty.. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
just jack 998 Posted March 13, 2012 Report Share Posted March 13, 2012 reading this topic is gunna turn me lesbian..men really are f****d up in the head arent they ... Bet you been giggling reading them though :yes: yeah some great revenge tips on here ... make sure you put the pics up when you turn the other "cheek" so to speak ok keep your inbox empty.. its not my "inbox" i was thinking about :tongue2: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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