darkie 143 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 because im depressed because no one will sell me a dog ive been thinking of things that will cheer me up.One of them is fat barmaids with elvis tattoos ,whats yours? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
long dogs 580 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 when my 3 year old son wipes bogy on the missus 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PlasticJock 539 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 A good old midget fight Quote Link to post Share on other sites
long dogs 580 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 A good old midget fight Quote Link to post Share on other sites
darkie 143 Posted February 28, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 when my mother in law bends over to pick something up and lets out a big fart Quote Link to post Share on other sites
morton 5,368 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 because im depressed because no one will sell me a dog ive been thinking of things that will cheer me up.One of them is fat barmaids with elvis tattoos ,whats yours? I used to be on friendly terms with a Fat ugly barmaid,a standing cock as no conscience was never a truer word spoken,the lads used to laugh when i waited for closing time,to walk her home,little did they know id been supping at the landlords expense all night,after a few beers it was surprising what an attractive lass she looked. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BOSCO 90 11 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 rangers thread 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Duncan 802 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 when the wife bends over and I get the kids to yell "Cobwebs!" 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Duncan 802 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 Crusty Jugglers Quote Link to post Share on other sites
quickdraw78 0 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 banging a bird from behind Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Marvin 193 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 Once went on holiday with a fat tattooed barmaid, had a blazing row with her, went back to the room and pissed in her suitcase, now I know there will be those who would cringe at going on holiday with a fat bird, but hey she paid and it was all inclusive lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
darkie 143 Posted February 28, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 you can watch a bit of telly then without her knowing Quote Link to post Share on other sites
darkie 143 Posted February 28, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 i shagged a fat bird once ,well more than one and more than once,im not exagarating when i say i had to physicaly lift a roll of flab because it was covering her fanny 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PlasticJock 539 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 Me and my mate pulled 2 fat birds a few years ago , he decided to get up and p*ss in her wardrobe in the middle of the night then go back to bed. She wakes up in the morning and tells him to get out, shouting and allsorts calling him a dirty b@stard etc... He knocks on my (birds) door and says lets go, I said I'll be 2 minutes, then hear him storming down the stairs. By the time I got downstairs he was outside having a fag, and the smell of sh*t was unbelievable - he'd shat in the poor girls kettle and put it on boil on the way out I nearly spewed everywhere but anytime I feel low that story always springs to mind, I just wish I could have seen the girls reaction when she came down 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
long dogs 580 Posted February 28, 2012 Report Share Posted February 28, 2012 :laugh: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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