Caprelous 217 Posted January 19, 2012 Report Share Posted January 19, 2012 (edited) Paddy and Mick had a spade each Paddy was digging the hole and his mate Mick imediately filled it back in This old woman was watching them doing this and after the 9th hole her curiosity got the better of her so she walked across the field and said to Paddy Tell me why does it take two men to dig a hole and fill it back in? Paddy replied well it normally takes three of us but the other lad who plants the trees phoned in sick this morning. Edited January 19, 2012 by Caprelous 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
the fezz 44 Posted January 19, 2012 Report Share Posted January 19, 2012 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted January 19, 2012 Report Share Posted January 19, 2012 Reminds me of the one where paddy and mick get a job,putting in telegraph poles. Gaffer comes to see them at lunch time."many have you lads put in this morning"? Two says mick. "two the gaffer says,that other team have put in 8this morning". Aye says mick,but look how far they have left them sticking out the ground. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
craigyboy 1,274 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Reminds me of the one where paddy and mick get a job,putting in telegraph poles. Gaffer comes to see them at lunch time."many have you lads put in this morning"? Two says mick. "two the gaffer says,that other team have put in 8this morning". Aye says mick,but look how far they have left them sticking out the ground. is that the same paddy that worked on a building site and a loose roof tile sliced his ear off, he ran to the bosses office screaming "mi feckin ears bin cut off" the boss gets paddy inside and sends some lads out to look for his severed ear, next minute a lad comes running in, holding an ear in his hand, shouting "paddy, ive found it" paddy looks at him an says "thats not mine son, mine had a pencil behind it" 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
just jack 998 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Reminds me of the one where paddy and mick get a job,putting in telegraph poles. Gaffer comes to see them at lunch time."many have you lads put in this morning"? Two says mick. "two the gaffer says,that other team have put in 8this morning". Aye says mick,but look how far they have left them sticking out the ground. is that the same paddy that worked on a building site and a loose roof tile sliced his ear off, he ran to the bosses office screaming "mi feckin ears bin cut off" the boss gets paddy inside and sends some lads out to look for his severed ear, next minute a lad comes running in, holding an ear in his hand, shouting "paddy, ive found it" paddy looks at him an says "thats not mine son, mine had a pencil behind it" heritage Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lurcher330 2,301 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Paddy and Mick must be from Kerry Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest thebigdog Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 f*****g racism is what this is 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 f*****g racism is what this is lol suppose it is a form of that mate. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
James Doyle 59 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 paddy and mick are council men... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest thebigdog Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were sitting in a bar, drinking and discussing how stupid their wives were. The Englishman says, "I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to the supermarket and bought $300 worth of meat because it was on sale, and we don't even have a freezer to keep it in." The Scotsman agrees that she sounds pretty thick, but says his wife is thicker. "Just last week, she went out and spent $17,000 on a new car," he laments, "and she doesn't even know how to drive!" The Irishman nods sagely, and agrees that these two woman sound like they both fell out of the stupid tree and got hit by every branch. However, he still thinks his wife is dumber. "Ah, it kills me every time i think of it," he chuckles. "My wife just left to go on a holiday in Greece. i watched her packing her bag, and she must have put about 100 condoms in there. And she doesn't even have a penis!" 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
THLpatrick 555 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Leave paddy alone. Paddy comes home one night to find his wife cheating, he grabs his wife and takes her into a room & locks the door, He puts the gun to his head and says ''dont know why your smiling, your next'' Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Somewhere in rural Ireland, a woman catches her husband at it with the babysitter. The husband is stood outside their cottage bare from the waist down, and the woman takes a swing at his privates with a carving knife. His severed balls drop to the floor, and the wife picks them up and throws them over the hedge... Paddy and Murphy are out for a quiet drive, and drive past the cottage just as the severed bollocks are flung over the hedge - SPLAT!! go the bollocks on the windscreen, and Murphy who was in the passenger seat let out a huge yelp, "Jesus Christ Patrick, did ye see that? That was some pair of bollocks on that last fly ye hit there!!" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
volunteer 32 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Somewhere in rural Ireland, a woman catches her husband at it with the babysitter. The husband is stood outside their cottage bare from the waist down, and the woman takes a swing at his privates with a carving knife. His severed balls drop to the floor, and the wife picks them up and throws them over the hedge... Paddy and Murphy are out for a quiet drive, and drive past the cottage just as the severed bollocks are flung over the hedge - SPLAT!! go the bollocks on the windscreen, and Murphy who was in the passenger seat let out a huge yelp, "Jesus Christ Patrick, did ye see that? That was some pair of bollocks on that last fly ye hit there!!" nowt like a racist MOD Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted January 20, 2012 Report Share Posted January 20, 2012 Somewhere in rural Ireland, a woman catches her husband at it with the babysitter. The husband is stood outside their cottage bare from the waist down, and the woman takes a swing at his privates with a carving knife. His severed balls drop to the floor, and the wife picks them up and throws them over the hedge... Paddy and Murphy are out for a quiet drive, and drive past the cottage just as the severed bollocks are flung over the hedge - SPLAT!! go the bollocks on the windscreen, and Murphy who was in the passenger seat let out a huge yelp, "Jesus Christ Patrick, did ye see that? That was some pair of bollocks on that last fly ye hit there!!" nowt like a racist MOD Ah get over yourself and call me a sheep shagger like everyone else does... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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