Just thought I would lighten the mood a little

[Caprelous 217]

An Arab had spent many days crossing the desert without finding a source of water. It got so bad that his camel died of thirst.

 

 

He crawled through the sands, certain that he was breathing his last breath, when suddenly, he saw a shiny object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him.

 

He crawled to the object, pulled it out of the sand, and discovered that he had a Manischewitz wine bottle.

 

It appeared that there may be a drop or two left in the bottle, so he unscrewed the top, and out popped a genie. BUT this was no ordinary Genie. This genie appeared to be a Chasidic [ultra religious] Rabbi, complete with black alpaca coat, black hat, side curls, and tzitzis.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

'Vell kid,' said the genie, 'you know how it voiks. You got tree vishes.'

 

'I'm not going to trust you,' says the Arab. 'I'm not going to trust a Jewish genie!'

 

'Vott you got to lose? Looks at me - you're a goner anyvay!'

 

The Arab thought about this for a minute, and decided that the genie was right. 'Okay, I wish I were in a lush oasis, with plentiful food and drink.'

 

* * * * * * * P O O F * * * * * * * * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Arab found himself in the most beautiful oasis he had ever seen and he was surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

 

'Okee-dokee kiddo, vat's your second vish?'

 

'My second wish is that I were rich beyond my wildest dreams.'

 

* * * * * * * P O O F * * * * * * * * *

 

The Arab found himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare old coins and precious gems.

 

'Okay kid, you got just vone more vish. Best you should make it a good vone!'

 

After thinking for a few minutes, the Arab says, 'I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will always need and want me!'

 

* * * * * * * P O O F * * * * * * * * *

 

He was turned into a tampon.

 

 

THE MORAL OF THE STORY:

 

If you're an Arab doing business with a Jewish genie, there's going to be a string attached.

[/indent]

Edited November 21, 2011 by Caprelous

[jetro 5,349]

:laugh: great.

[gerfalcon 13]

Groan....................

[Caprelous 217]

H. It beats learning how to get a camel to drink by leading it to the waters edge cracking its nutts with two accrington bricks so when it goes oooooooooosh it fills its sack.

I tried it once and this old lady said surely that hurts dosent it, I replied only if you get your thumbs inbetween

 

 

 

There was a knock at my door the other day and when I opened it my neighbour Abdul was lying face down in the snow with a kitchen knife stuck firmly in his back dead.

I ran back in the house and shouted to my wife.

 

"Quick come and see whats happened"

What is it she asked?

 

I replied "you.ll not believe this

Its been bleeding snowing"

Edited November 22, 2011 by Caprelous

[gerfalcon 13]

Stu

 

Keep digging out those Boys Own Book of Wizard Japes you've had stored in the attic since 1955.

[Caprelous 217]

Stu

 

Keep digging out those Boys Own Book of Wizard Japes you've had stored in the attic since 1955.

 

I apologise for not returning the book sooner I really should not have held onto it for all these years I know but if you send me your current address I will stick it in the post for you H , i am sure it will go with your other annuals you have like Dan Dare and The Beano I know your favourite used to be The Hotspur

[gerfalcon 13]

Stu

 

Its been so long I had forgotten I had lent it to you. Besides..................

 

.

Oor Wullie and The Broons is more my cup of tea.

Edited November 22, 2011 by gerfalcon

[Caprelous 217]

Which one do you fancy out of these

http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=broons+and+oor+willie&tag=googhydr-21&index=stripbooks&hvadid=15524893910&ref=pd_sl_16v380gwte_b

 

I am sure the lads on here will have a whip round and get you it for Christmas

[gerfalcon 13]

That's very kind. But I rarely get the time these days to flick through a comic book.

 

Perhaps they would be better served by buying more of these.

 

www.psclothing.co.uk/Felix_The_Fox.

Edited November 22, 2011 by gerfalcon