bullshitters

[rascal_2005 79]

Once had a mate told he he brought these real good trainers in the usa but couldn bring them back with him as a racoon stole the pair!?!?!?!? Bizzare!!!

[Ratreeper 441]

i had a mate who said he got mugged at gun point in spain, but managed to grab the gun out of his hand and pistol whipped the mugger to death with it. If it was true he wouldn't be bloody telling everyone for a start...he also reckoned he used to smuggle kilos of coke across the border down his trousers with his dad. He was a bit of a story topper, anything anyone said they did he always had done it twice, or better.

[Millet 4,497]

I once new a lad who was full of it..he had a fight with his brother one day and he stuck a knitting needle in his ear and it come out the other side..another time they where fighting and ended up in a park pond..he had a wooly hat on with a ciggarrete in his mouth..he pulled the hat over his head and ducked him under the water..when he came back up and pulled the hat of ...the ciggarrete was still alight.. ..he found a tarantula one day while out ferreting so he phoned the fire brigade to come and remove it..he also chased a deer one day on foot with a knife in his mouth and caught and stabbed it like tarzen..

 

I believe that people who talk utter shit like that must think you are daft to believe them..

[scothunter 12,609]

I once new a lad who was full of it..he had a fight with his brother one day and he stuck a knitting needle in his ear and it come out the other side..another time they where fighting and ended up in a park pond..he had a wooly hat on with a ciggarrete in his mouth..he pulled the hat over his head and ducked him under the water..when he came back up and pulled the hat of ...the ciggarrete was still alight.. ..he found a tarantula one day while out ferreting so he phoned the fire brigade to come and remove it..he also chased a deer one day on foot with a knife in his mouth and caught and stabbed it like tarzen..

 

I believe that people who talk utter shit like that must think you are daft to believe them..

 

lol i know mate.we are expected to believe this.i used to be polite and just nod.now i just tell them straight.stop lying!its like that charachter in phoneix nights.lol

[Lab 10,979]

Was a story going around my village when I was young that this guy punched a cow..... And he dropped it..... Pmsl!!!

[Millet 4,497]

Ive heard of someone doing that to a horse... ..i also used to know a lad who had a old .22 air rifle that could put hole's through a chimney pot at over 100yrd's..

[poacher3161 1,766]

An old goerdie miner called Ken suiter [rip] who used to live in a caravan on the allotments used to have us in stitches with some of his tall tales the best one being how they used to send crabs with a candel on their backs down rabbit warrens to flush rabbits i pointed out i bet it was a feker on a windy day needing a game bag full of matches.

[moggy rock 22]

Ive heard of someone doing that to a horse... ..i also used to know a lad who had a old .22 air rifle that could put hole's through a chimney pot at over 100yrd's..

i did it to a race horse,,it was in its stable were we was lodging in swindon and i turned to walk away and it latched onto my shoulder drawing blood,,i lost it and wacked it breaking 3 knuckles..the house just shook it of :icon_redface: :icon_redface: the story line is the horse won its first ever race 2 days later at 16 to 1 :laugh: its name was calder bridge..25 years ago this was lol...no bull...

[mackem 26,329]

the best one being how they used to send crabs with a candel on their backs down rabbit warrens to flush rabbits

That might be a north-east thing because I used to hear it often as a kid....from the rabbit sniffing pepper thread.

 

Posted Today, 10:36 AM

 

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that does work mate. but you have to melt a small candle on its shell so it can see.And if your near the sea ferreting warrens forsake the tortoise('Cos they are expensive as f*ck nowadays,not just 50p like when I was a kid,and the local pet-shop had a cage crammed with them,oh,AND it had a monkey that smoked )just rake around in rockpools and get yourself a decent sized crab,dry the back of its shell(because wax wont "hold" on a wet carapace)stick the candle on and let the crab scuttle off into the warren,its not called ferreting,its called crabbing,but your wife mightnt be overly impressed if you tell her you were out all day catching crabs Its true.........Honest

[poacher3161 1,766]

the best one being how they used to send crabs with a candel on their backs down rabbit warrens to flush rabbits

That might be a north-east thing because I used to hear it often as a kid....from the rabbit sniffing pepper thread.

 

Posted Today, 10:36 AM

 

Quote

 

that does work mate. but you have to melt a small candle on its shell so it can see.And if your near the sea ferreting warrens forsake the tortoise('Cos they are expensive as f*ck nowadays,not just 50p like when I was a kid,and the local pet-shop had a cage crammed with them,oh,AND it had a monkey that smoked )just rake around in rockpools and get yourself a decent sized crab,dry the back of its shell(because wax wont "hold" on a wet carapace)stick the candle on and let the crab scuttle off into the warren,its not called ferreting,its called crabbing,but your wife mightnt be overly impressed if you tell her you were out all day catching crabs Its true.........Honest

His best one was [bANNED TEXT] he told us about [bANNED TEXT] he was on the sumberines in the navy he would put a cigg and a couple of matches in a durex tighe a knot in it put it down his trunks then swim to shore then strike the two matches light the cigg and people on the beach used to say look at him comeing out of the sea smokeing lol

[Work them hard 339]

An old fella from round my way called us up to go sort a problem fox, we got there and he never stopped bragging about this border he had with him saying it would do anything and was game as fook we offered to put the collar on his dog and let it have a look to which he totally changed his tune. The same guy was also showing us runs under the fences that deer had been crawling through! these runs were more rabbit than anything i thought he was just having a laugh but it turned out he was being serious ( in his mind ) he told us of all the deer he had snared under fences in his time.

 

[Lab 10,979]

Spoke to an old guy in a pub one night at the bar. Think it was my 21st and he realised it was my Birthday and said it was his birthday too and blethered away while we were getting served. He asked me what i done for a living and once he realised i was into the whole hunting scene he told me about the deer he shot............at 8 miles away!!!.. Needless to say we call him "8 mile" if he is in the pub now. How i got back to the table without dropping the pints i'll never know..... :laugh:

[asanley 1,009]

A fella I knew told me he worked on the rigs with John Wayne ! , one day at work someone fell from high up , hit some metal grating and came through the other side like chips , he casually took off his helmet and scooped up the mess but the DUKE fainted because apparently he was a bit of a wimp .

[torchey 1,327]

The latest one i,ve heard is someone i know was behind a sandbag with 6 taliban firing at him and he jumped up and wiped them all out the poacher who got caught and had a hosepipe put up his arse and they then threaded barbed wire up it and then removed the hosepipe,yep that was a goodun,old boy down the road swears blind he had a [frat] as a kid ferret x rat and when i was a kid there was a compulsive lier who swears he caught a shark off southend pier with a leg of lamb,quality...