for all those serving and ex forces

[festa 206]

You know you're a squaddie/ex squaddie when:

 

You lie when people ask you what you do for a living.

You use target indication to point out essence girls.

Eyebrows becomes a question.

You moan about everything.

You hate the word Fella.

You have the darkest sense of humor ever

 

You insist on dancing like a twat

Your civvie mates don't understand any of the terminology you use such as 'no dramas', 'essence' and “rats”

You can't help saying "Roger", "Say again" and other snappy bits of VP.

You walk at a ridiculous pace and are physically incapable of walking at the shopping pace of your girlfriend. (If your a bloke)

You refer to personal organization as "admin."

 

You have a slight mistrust of people who don’t drink brews

You use patrol hand signals in a nightclub if people can't hear you.

Nothing soldiers do shocks you any more

You can't watch war movies without giving a running commentary. Most of the time it being “well that was Shit”

People in prison have more luxuries and human rights than you do.

 

Whenever you spell something out you use the phonetic alphabet.

You don't trust your mum/wife/girlfriend/any woman (If you're a bloke) to iron your kit because deep down you think that your ironing is better.

You point using your whole hand in a karate chop motion

You find that the conversation somehow always comes back round to you, because you're more interesting than most topics of conversation.

As soon as you don’t have to you don’t shave

 

You spend hours wondering where in civvie street you can get an equal disposable income and at least 6 weeks holiday a year, by completing an inversely proportionally tiny amount of tangible work.

Your blood boils when you see civvies wearing DPM. (apart from us hunting types)

 

Going out on Thursday "international army night out" wherever it may be, or whichever course one is on, involves forming the ring-of-steel, talking about ourselves and the army and staring at girls; who if they don't immediately come over are obviously lesbians.

You come out in a cold sweat if you find yourself still working after lunch on a Friday

You have to stop work at 10am for NAAFI break or else you might not make it to lunch.

Even though your disposable income is twice that of a civvie you still manage to spend it all, every month, with nothing to show for it.

 

You think that eating every meal for a week with the same spoon that you licked clean and kept in the pocket of the same shirt you've worn all week is absolutely fine

 

its all true lads lol

 

atb gary

[stealthy1 3,964]

I know a lot of folk that live like that, and never been in the forces

[pianoman 3,587]

Actually...

I was at Duxford airshow a couple of weeks ago. And I did see a long haired twat wearing an RAF No 1 Best Blue jacket with jeans and a T-shirt...

 

And I gave him a look of death!

[festa 206]

lol like i say its all true lol

 

atb gary

[Daz 7 563]

So True Gary Mate ,

Most of us still think like Squaddies even though most of us left the Forces decades ago, Second nature now as it's been drummed into you !!!!!!!

Can't remember phone numbers but can remember my Army 8 digit number forward and back wards and can say it at speed .

[festa 206]

So True Gary Mate ,

Most of us still think like Squaddies even though most of us left the Forces decades ago, Second nature now as it's been drummed into you !!!!!!!

Can't remember phone numbers but can remember my Army 8 digit number forward and back wards and can say it at speed .

you and me both [bANNED TEXT]

 

atb gary

[Marksman 934]

love it!!!

[dtw 42]

Very good, so true. Even after 28 years as a civvy.

[andy s410c 59]

Sums it up perfectly Festa :laugh: I'm a ex matelot(sailor),best time of my life when i look back....would have been in 21 yrs last saturday...wonder if i would have risen above Able Seaman after all that time :D

[Guzzik 1]

I couldn't get in the regulars due to being deaf in one ear. Always wanted to be in The RAF as part of the RAF regiment or dare I say it, a snowdrop. Still, I did a stint in the T.A. Then went in to the ATC as an adult W.O teaching cadets field craft and shooting, drill, and was one of the DoE officers for our Squadron. One of our cadets came back from the first gulf war on leave and was visiting the squadron. He was standing in the drill hall and was staring at the female cadets with a pursed mouth type look. One of our other Warrents asked him why he was eyeballing the females cadets and asked whether he had seen woman in the gulf to which the lad looks at him and says in a really strong put on Texas accent, "Thar ain't no females in this here mans army boy, only grunts with *****!" I needed oxygene!! I had water pouring out of my eyes from laughing. The WO who spoke to him didn't get it which made it even funnier!! BUT yes, as the OP has typed, this lad said that as well and that he had a dislike of civvy street coz it was full of "maybe I wannabees"

Edited October 29, 2011 by Guzzik

[davyt63 1,845]

hi Gary

too bloody true,i remember my days in the army cadets :laugh:

 

 

PS. BANTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

regards

 

Davy

[fry 209]

why do you hate the word fella though? is there a reason?

[pianoman 3,587]

Sums it up perfectly Festa :laugh: I'm a ex matelot(sailor),best time of my life when i look back....would have been in 21 yrs last saturday...wonder if i would have risen above Able Seaman after all that time :D

:laugh: From your avatar for a moment, I thought you were ex SS! :laugh:

[pianoman 3,587]

Even now, I won't go out anywhere without a shine on my shoes. I hate laziness and sloth. I walk like a fecking racehorse and I f*****g detest young guys who play war simulated games, when they could be joined up and out in Afghanistan shooting ragheads.

 

f**k IEDs I would absolute love a tour of Helmand with my old SLR and L115. I would f*****g just break every friggin long distance kill record standing.

 

If I was an unemployed young fella now, I know what I'd be doing!

[secretagentmole 1,701]

Even now, I won't go out anywhere without a shine on my shoes. I hate laziness and sloth. I walk like a fecking racehorse and I f*****g detest young guys who play war simulated games, when they could be joined up and out in Afghanistan shooting ragheads.

 

f**k IEDs I would absolute love a tour of Helmand with my old SLR and L115. I would f*****g just break every friggin long distance kill record standing.

 

If I was an unemployed young fella now, I know what I'd be doing!

 

Rag Heads? Simon! You are now being politically incorrect.

Rag is a demeaning term, how about Table Cloth Topper wearer? Linen Spread Head? Towel Topper?