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Anybody nearly been hit by a motor?


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I was once driving my Bugatti Veyron through Paris when a man jumped onto the Champs Elysees trying to kill himself, being a great driver (and lover) i slammed on the brakes and helped the man, i took him for a beer and a plate of frites and frogs legs and that started my great friendship with the Hollywood actor Tom Hanks :thumbs:

bull shite

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Just on the way back from the chemist and a guy steps in the road. A car coming the opposite was slams on, skids a good 20-30 ft and stops, and I'm not exaggerating, about 5 inches from this stunned b

i fell out the window on a double decker bus pissing about as a kid with my mates...luckily it was a short drop to the roof of the bus shelter but when i jumped down i froze as a tranny van screeched

Ah the old flying meteor... People should dispose of their old BSA air rifles more sensibly instead of randomly chucking them over hedges with no regard to any Irish sheep farmers who might be stood

I was once driving a subaru legacy at 189mph(super charger bulit by me) across a stubble field after disabled squirrel when Christopher Biggin stepped out from behind a bush wearing a safari suit, due to my excellent driving (and lovemaking) skills i could of avoided him.........but i didn't

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i had you down for an aston martin man myself simon

 

 

Now you mention it Scott, when i was modelling swinwear for Matalan Daniel Craig saw my posters outside kwiksave and asked to meet me, i gave him some tips on improving his six pack and has i took him to McColls for a twix and bottle of banana milk he asked me if he could have a spin in my car, i told him to be carefull as i was an excellent driver(and lover) and the car was very quick, two days later Daniel changed the car on the set of Casino Royal from a Fait Multipla to a Aston Martin Vantage, Daniel and i are still friends today and he still reminisses about the day i ran Biggins over, great times............

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yes i got run over by a car,"MY OWN" used to have an old mini van cost me £40 not bad for my first set of wheels but had a dodgy starter motor so would bump start it all the time,this particular day as i went to jump in i hit my knee on the door laid me out flat and then the back wheel rolled over my other foot,lying in the road sqeeling like a pig watching it roll off down the incline :laugh: :laugh:

got run over by a motor bike in town center years but thats another story :D

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didnt that biggins fellow get done for stealing cheese from a shop?pretty sure i remeber something like that.

 

Well im not sure to be honest, i did see him sipping dom pom and watching us yokels at the countryside march back in the day, and after the "incident" when Daniel and i weighed Biggins' body down with the HMS Ark Royal and sunk him off the Beiring straights i did receive a huge cheeseboard from Waitrose so perhaps its true................

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I was almost hit by a meteor once, it was up in the sky I was standing under :blink:

 

True story.

 

Ah the old flying meteor... ;) People should dispose of their old BSA air rifles more sensibly instead of randomly chucking them over hedges with no regard to any Irish sheep farmers who might be stood the other side.. :thumbs::laugh:

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i had you down for an aston martin man myself simon

 

 

Now you mention it Scott, when i was modelling swinwear for Matalan Daniel Craig saw my posters outside kwiksave and asked to meet me, i gave him some tips on improving his six pack and has i took him to McColls for a twix and bottle of banana milk he asked me if he could have a spin in my car, i told him to be carefull as i was an excellent driver(and lover) and the car was very quick, two days later Daniel changed the car on the set of Casino Royal from a Fait Multipla to a Aston Martin Vantage, Daniel and i are still friends today and he still reminisses about the day i ran Biggins over, great times............

Why do i believe all off your stories apart from the 'lover' part................. :laugh: I cant see how that ill shaped freak i saw standing against that field gate can be more than a circus act for the ladies........ :whistling:

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