longdog runner 5 Posted September 20, 2011 Report Share Posted September 20, 2011 prob showing my age with this one "I`ll have your guts for garters " Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gonetoearth 5,144 Posted September 20, 2011 Report Share Posted September 20, 2011 me gran had a market stall one of her pals walked up and told her while i was stood there " hear about doreen she won the pools " me gran says dead pan faced , " AH SHE'LL HAVE NO LUCK Quote Link to post Share on other sites
the_stig 6,614 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey .... its brass monkey weather ... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lab 10,979 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 "Its raining cats and dugs"............. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 My granddad used to say when you'd finally got the hang of a difficult task he was trying to teach you, or if a rugby team started to get their game together after a period of crap play: "That's the hammer!" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lab 10,979 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 My granddad used to say when you'd finally got the hang of a difficult task he was trying to teach you, or if a rugby team started to get their game together after a period of crap play: "That's the hammer!" ......the lads say that when were out on the mountain bikes too mate......Can be cycling along and when they want to put the foot down they say "Right get the hammer down"... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
danw 1,748 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 my grandad always used to say" that lads got eyes like a shithouse rat" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
FightTheBan 1,147 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 Away and boil yer heid! Can't expect anything from a sow but a grunt FTB Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bosun11 537 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 As a kid,used to have a Great Aunt that would come out with some wierd ones... For anything sticking out, like bed head hair, ' (It's) sticking out like kittys leg'.. Couldn't work this one out for years, thought kitty was one of her friends who i'd never met..! If you or anyone else were hanging round with mates, ' (He's) stuck to him/them like shit sticks to a blanket'...! And fav for strange, if she was surprised by anything, ' GOD BLESS..! Said the woman as she peed in the river'...?? She had loads, i'll keep thinking..! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
j1985 1,983 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 If I got up earlier than normal my old man would say "you shit your bed?" One my grandad said which cracked me up was whenever he heard a woman be it family or strangers talking about a newborn baby he'd say how much ? They reply 7lbs 6 and he'd say "oh that's cheap must be hideous" lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 first up best dressed was another one Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 My dad asking whether a pregnant woman has given birth yet: "Has she f*****g calved yet or what?" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mooch. 177 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 On one of the golf courses I used to work on if someone had mowed a wiggly stripe the call used to come over the radio "Someone bring the mongoose to the 7th fairway, P_____ has been chasing snakes again. " 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lurcher330 2,297 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 one i heard today (beat it like a red headed step child) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted September 21, 2011 Report Share Posted September 21, 2011 one i heard today (beat it like a red headed step child) lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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