Lab 10,979 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 Maybe your next wan will be funny? LOL, atleast I'm trying. Ok lets go then............ Did you hear about the gay wizard? Disappeared wi a poof! .........................tumbleweed....... funnier than the joke Touch a nerve with the gay jokes did i? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
steveS.Yorks 161 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 Gay fella goes to the doctors "hi doc,i think ive got aids" doc,"drop y trousers and bend over" doc looks at his arse and concludes "oh dear,its aids allright" gay "is there anything i can do doc" doc,"yes,i want you to go out tonight and drink 10 pints of guiness,then have a hot curry,do the same every night for a week" gay "will that cure me doc" doc "no son it wont,but it will show you what your arse is for" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Malt 379 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 (edited) Some crackers there lads, fair play! The wife told me to use my imagination and go out and buy something that made her look sexy . . . . . . so I came back with a case of Stella and two bottles of Vodka ... I nearly shit myself the other day, I was in this bar when a man in arab clothes ran in shouting "Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Alava bag of crisps please" the stuttering b*****d.... Gatwick airport has been closed after a massive cloud of dust drifted in 2 uk airspace! The cleaner of the Arsenal trophy cabinet has now been arrested Felt sorry for the hypnotist I saw last night.He hypnotised 7 men then dropped the mic on his foot & yelled "f**k Me"... What happened next will haunt me forever.... A sexy young woman was caught trying to smuggle nearly £200,000 of pure cocaine in her lace bra and knickers. It looks like that plan went tit's-up. Beastiality is wrong, people who do that are f*****g animals... I went round my mates house the other day, he showed me a VHS of him and his mates beating up a defenceless old guy. I couldn't believe it, I was shocked! I mean, who the f**k uses video recorders these days....? when I was a child, I used to love watching Blue Peter. Not the TV programme, the kid from school, I used to steal the asswipe's inhalers... Edited May 16, 2010 by maltenby Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mackay 3,400 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 Went round to my mother in laws last week and there were four big bruisers kicking the shit out of her, are you not going to help I screamed at her husband, they're managing fine without me he said. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gaz 284 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 Husband comes home from work with a cock-sucking frog under his arm,turns to his wife and hands it to her.Wife says "what the hell have i to do with this"Husband without even so much as a glance in her direction says...."Teach it to cook and f**k off!" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gav22 24 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 .........................6 REASONS WHY MEN PREFER GUNS TO WOMEN................................. 1 you can trade an old 45 for a 22 2 you can admire a friends gun and he will let you try it out 3 your gun stays with you even if you run out of ammo 4 guns function normal every day 5 a gun dosnt mind if you go to sleep after you use it 6 you can buy A FU*KING SILENCER FOR A GUN Quote Link to post Share on other sites
craigyboy 1,274 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 a woman was sat on the bed looking at her fanny when she shouts her husband "here love do you think ive got a big fanny" husband says "no love its beautiful" still worried about it the woman decides to put the mirror on the floor and stand over it so she can have a better look,at which point her husband runs into the bedroom and pushes his wife flying across the bedroom "what the feck did you do that for"she says he replies "what,if i hadnt of pushed you,you would of fallen down that fecker" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
scothunter 12,609 Posted May 16, 2010 Report Share Posted May 16, 2010 The last entry in anne franks diary read. "today is my birthday,father bought me a drum kit" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lee81 190 Posted May 17, 2010 Report Share Posted May 17, 2010 whats the diffrence between michael jackson and a carrier bag ? ones white plastic and dangeress for kids to play with the other you put you shoping in Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SHOTGUNSNIPER 47 Posted May 17, 2010 Report Share Posted May 17, 2010 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
christian71 3,187 Posted May 17, 2010 Report Share Posted May 17, 2010 WHAT IS THE HEIGHT OF SUSPICION?????? SEEING THE COALMAN LEAVE YOUR HOUSE WITH ONE CLEAN FINGER !! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
christian71 3,187 Posted May 17, 2010 Report Share Posted May 17, 2010 WHAT DOES A WANK HAVE IN COMMON WITH A PAKI???? ITS NICE TO KNOCK ONE OUT EVERY NOW AND THEN!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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