Am after some parenting advice?

[shepp 2,285]

I would insist on the police going to the biological father and letting him know that he is being watched. I would not let the the bloke near the boy again, let the lad know all that is going on.

Canabis is a big ambition killer and a sure fire way to help you end up socially a few runs down on the ladder.

Of course there is also the chance of serious mental illness if you are one of the unlucky minority that reacts badly to it.

[RicW 67]

Kristian -

It might be worth pointing out to the lad that whilst possession of up to an ounce for your own use has been decriminalised, a caution still goes on your record. Try getting a SGC or FAC with that on your dossier. Possession with intent to sell carries a 5year stretch. If he got pulled with a few gramme wraps the fuzz and the court would regard that as prima facie evidence of intent to sell.

 

RicW

[fireman 10,868]

Like's been said mate if he's going to smoke it he'll smoke it be it behind your back or up front,the way i'd suggest is having a good man to man with him and LISTEN to what he says and what ever is said between you two stays between you two.If he says he still wants to have a spliff with his mates then let him but only at weekends and only if he pays for it himself with work earned cash,let him and his mates have a spliff in his room then you can at least keep an eye on them and his mates will think your all not so bad and maybe even open up to you about any wrong doings.I'd have a word with the father but tell your lad what you've said so there's no back fire on you,i myself have been to some very gloomy places through drugs in the past and seen sights i'd never want my own kids to see so i know what i'm on about.i have 3 lads of my own and 2 step kids who i worry so much about but you can't wrap them up in cotton wool but just do your best to stear them in the right direction.Smoking weed can lead to other things due to it being illigal so the only place to get it is from drug dealers and other things become avalable,it doesn't allways happen but it can.All i can say mate is listen and give support as best you can,if you want a chat about things your welcome to pm me and i'll try my best to help.All the very best bud whatever way you choose to go.

[Nik_B 3,790]

smoking weed turns you mind in to jelly especially if your yound imressionable and dont have much else going on in their life. There is a minority of regular smokers that function normally but certainly in my case it didn't do me any favours and destroyed my motivation and self confidence. Also the people I hung around with were total farkin losers tbh.

 

Get him to ditch his loser bio dad and waster mates and get out hunting with you or take up some sport. Get him away from that bad life style mate!

[Tiff 36]

anyone who thinks parenting is remotely easy is a fool ... good luck with your situation, I wish I had some good words of wisdom for you

[Annmarie09 5]

i would say thats the norm for a 15 year old boy in this day an age ,wouldnt worry to much normally keeps them out of trouble if anything . i have 2 boys myself 22 and 18 and both of them smoke it ,its just something lads do at that age he will grow out off it one day ,at least normally they just stay in on the xbox and get stonned and you know were they are most of the time instead of wondering were they are and what they are up to ,as for his dad he,ll crawl back into the wood work when your lad starts hounding him for money all the time,and kay that doe,s surprise me that you got one too (lol)

 

I can't believe that anyone would take this point of view, it's not just that the lad may have been smoking the stuff, it's that his so-called dad was trying to get him to deal for him. He's only just 15 for god's sake, what happens once the police have him on their radar as a dealer? I certainly wouldn't be happy if my son was sitting on his bum all day playing games and smoking!

 

Perhaps a word with the local bobbies might be an idea, just to sound them out as to whether they could send someone round (a community officer or someone) to have a gentle talk with your son about the consequences of being done as a dealer. That's if there are any further problems about it. Hopefully the chat with the lad will have persuaded him that it isn't worth it, I think you have done the right thing.

[Aaron Proffitt 142]

If he wants to experiment and what not ,that's one thing....but the sperm donor pimpin' his own son as a pusher ?

 

Unforgivable...

[fishfish 17]

my forst instinct is to say go round and batter him. but that will just make you guys look bad. go to the police and ask to see a seargent and if he doesnt take you seriously ask to see the inspector.this dealing by your son could lead to a criminal record that will follow him for life. he is too young and impressionable to make that decision on his own.

[dog fox 16]

i would say thats the norm for a 15 year old boy in this day an age ,wouldnt worry to much normally keeps them out of trouble if anything . i have 2 boys myself 22 and 18 and both of them smoke it ,its just something lads do at that age he will grow out off it one day ,at least normally they just stay in on the xbox and get stonned and you know were they are most of the time instead of wondering were they are and what they are up to ,as for his dad he,ll crawl back into the wood work when your lad starts hounding him for money all the time,and kay that doe,s surprise me that you got one too (lol)

 

I can't believe that anyone would take this point of view, it's not just that the lad may have been smoking the stuff, it's that his so-called dad was trying to get him to deal for him. He's only just 15 for god's sake, what happens once the police have him on their radar as a dealer? I certainly wouldn't be happy if my son was sitting on his bum all day playing games and smoking!

 

Perhaps a word with the local bobbies might be an idea, just to sound them out as to whether they could send someone round (a community officer or someone) to have a gentle talk with your son about the consequences of being done as a dealer. That's if there are any further problems about it. Hopefully the chat with the lad will have persuaded him that it isn't worth it, I think you have done the right thing.

 

didnt mean the selling of it and i think you new that

[Annmarie09 5]

i would say thats the norm for a 15 year old boy in this day an age ,wouldnt worry to much normally keeps them out of trouble if anything . i have 2 boys myself 22 and 18 and both of them smoke it ,its just something lads do at that age he will grow out off it one day ,at least normally they just stay in on the xbox and get stonned and you know were they are most of the time instead of wondering were they are and what they are up to ,as for his dad he,ll crawl back into the wood work when your lad starts hounding him for money all the time,and kay that doe,s surprise me that you got one too (lol)

 

I can't believe that anyone would take this point of view, it's not just that the lad may have been smoking the stuff, it's that his so-called dad was trying to get him to deal for him. He's only just 15 for god's sake, what happens once the police have him on their radar as a dealer? I certainly wouldn't be happy if my son was sitting on his bum all day playing games and smoking!

 

Perhaps a word with the local bobbies might be an idea, just to sound them out as to whether they could send someone round (a community officer or someone) to have a gentle talk with your son about the consequences of being done as a dealer. That's if there are any further problems about it. Hopefully the chat with the lad will have persuaded him that it isn't worth it, I think you have done the right thing.

 

didnt mean the selling of it and i think you new that

 

Well no, because you didn't say, but fair enough. Not criticising here because it's nothing to do with me but I'm curious, if your son is 22 when do you think he'll "grow out of it"? Someone close to me was smoking a lot of weed as a teenager and it lost him a couple of good jobs, as well as nearly burning my parents house down. The odd joint here and there is one thing, but regularly getting stoned is not something I consider healthy. And yes, I have tried it (I also tried it as a painkiller but without too much success), but never, ever since my child was born.

[craigyboy 1,274]

smoking weed turns you mind in to jelly especially if your yound imressionable and dont have much else going on in their life. There is a minority of regular smokers that function normally but certainly in my case it didn't do me any favours and destroyed my motivation and self confidence. Also the people I hung around with were total farkin losers tbh.

 

Get him to ditch his loser bio dad and waster mates and get out hunting with you or take up some sport. Get him away from that bad life style mate!

quality,some of the replys regarding weed are typical of the uneducated how many of you drink? the cost and damage that alcohol does to our society is unbelievable but its legal so that makes it ok not a clue some people

 

id go and see his dad and knock that dealing lark on the head as for him smoking it you read up about it dont listen to the bullshit propaganda from organisations and people who no nothing and then have a chat with him about it and ffs dont talk to frank

Edited January 14, 2010 by craigyboy

[mossyh07 64]

Just think of the town you live in.. Think of the people over 25 that you know are stoners.. You'll find very few of them ever amount to anything, its always there own families that end up with drugs problems, and the ones that get into selling it are never any better off because they havn't a fu*cking clue.. Waste of money and time (the gargle is too mind) Just my opinion

[Nik_B 3,790]

smoking weed turns you mind in to jelly especially if your yound imressionable and dont have much else going on in their life. There is a minority of regular smokers that function normally but certainly in my case it didn't do me any favours and destroyed my motivation and self confidence. Also the people I hung around with were total farkin losers tbh.

 

Get him to ditch his loser bio dad and waster mates and get out hunting with you or take up some sport. Get him away from that bad life style mate!

quality,some of the replys regarding weed are typical of the uneducated how many of you drink? the cost and damage that alcohol does to our society is unbelievable but its legal so that makes it ok not a clue some people

 

id go and see his dad and knock that dealing lark on the head as for him smoking it you read up about it dont listen to the bullshit propaganda from organisations and people who no nothing and then have a chat with him about it and ffs dont talk to frank

 

I am very well educated on drugs mate. I've taken enough to sink a ship and I can tell you for a fact that I would have been better off if I hadn't taken them. There are thousands of parents who've had to watch their kids turn in to an unmotivated waste of oxygen because of weed.

 

Maybe you are lucky, maybe you only smoke a bit here and there but most of the hundred of people I knew growing up who smoked did it as a way of life and f*&ked themselves up because of it. They/we also ended up getting involved with some nasty characters, violence, police and without telling you my lfe story it ended in tears for most of us. I was lucky I got a second chance and went to Uni and then got a job but ALL of that possitive stuff happened after I stopped with the drugs.

 

You are doing what you claim the alcohol industry is doing which is denying any bad effect just because you enjoy taking it.

 

Kids should take drugs and yes they deffinately shouldn't drink either. As parents we have to guide them best we can not make crap excuses and say it's normal!

[Strong Stuff 2,171]

 

Set the pothead hippy on fire.

 

Tell the lad not to do anything that's not worth getting caught for!

 

Have him selling rocks outside schools and you can both retire .............

[tango 221]

Good to see people giving me good advice. I don't want him throwing his life away so young, he has the whole world infront of him and i know he can become someone instead of a noone like his so called dad.

you are his dad fella ,that prick was just a sperm donor