camies 1 Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Time & time again you read about experts being sieved for information by novices and that their livelihold is being pinched by chancers. i can understand their frustration but read on and have a laugh. This actually happened and believe me not even a comedy writer could have thought of this one! I'm what could be called a keen amateur. I'll never be a professional moler, never wanted to be, but enjoy trapping moles for fun. Behind us is a farmers field that seems to grow nothing but moles so I get loads of practice keeping my garden nice. Imagine my surprise then when a 'professional expert moleman' laid into me as I was setting a trap IN MY OWN FRONT GARDEN. First I was asked what i thought I was doing (I'm placing a half barrel trap at the time and just in case the experts lay into me, it was an English made trap not some Chinese or foreign rubbish) and that I was breaking the law. Really says I and asks why . With every second word fu----g this and that he told me that plebs like me were stealing business from professional molemen and that if he caught me again at this house (he didn't know I lived there) he would 'do me'. His van had his name, phone number and trade (mole catcher) on the back but that is not important. I (having decided that he was a prat) asked him what law i was breaking. Trapping moles without a licence was the reply. Just gets funnier and funnier doesn't it. Then the wife comes out with a cuppa for me and he starts demanding to know why she is employing a 'pleb' like me when she should be using a professional. Luckily my wife has a wicked sense of humour and she said that i was cheap only charging her a cup of tea and a roll in bed! The guy turned a funny colour something between red wine and green, stormed back to his van and returned with a camera and took my picture. Again, the wife was really quick and gave me a cuddle , asked of he would take one of the two of us and he stormed off. we fell about laughing, it was just so funny! The end of the story is that today we were shopping at our local country store getting food for the dog etc. and in walks the idiot. He comes over to the lad helping me and relates the story to him. He nearly wets himself (he's a close friend) and lets the truth out that we're married, live at the address he is on about, and basically what a prat he is. Everyone is laughing now and he storms out telling the world that he has photographs and is going to report me to the police for setting a mole trap. I ask you, was he just having a bad couple of days or did a rabid mole gnaw on his thumb? Quote Link to post
aaronpigeonplucker 32 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 :clapper: :rofl: Quote Link to post
ferret15 0 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 there are some Muppet's about thats for shore i was reported to the RSPCA for blindfolding my horses what they were actually wearing was this http://www.saddler.co.uk/shop.html?cr=171&pr=223 to stop the flies causing infection in there eyes Quote Link to post
Guest Countryboyo Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 Brilliant. your wife is a legend for playing along. He must have felt like some tosser alltogether. Quote Link to post
arnieboy 93 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 Time & time again you read about experts being sieved for information by novices and that their livelihold is being pinched by chancers. i can understand their frustration but read on and have a laugh. This actually happened and believe me not even a comedy writer could have thought of this one! I'm what could be called a keen amateur. I'll never be a professional moler, never wanted to be, but enjoy trapping moles for fun. Behind us is a farmers field that seems to grow nothing but moles so I get loads of practice keeping my garden nice. Imagine my surprise then when a 'professional expert moleman' laid into me as I was setting a trap IN MY OWN FRONT GARDEN. First I was asked what i thought I was doing (I'm placing a half barrel trap at the time and just in case the experts lay into me, it was an English made trap not some Chinese or foreign rubbish) and that I was breaking the law. Really says I and asks why . With every second word fu----g this and that he told me that plebs like me were stealing business from professional molemen and that if he caught me again at this house (he didn't know I lived there) he would 'do me'. His van had his name, phone number and trade (mole catcher) on the back but that is not important. I (having decided that he was a prat) asked him what law i was breaking. Trapping moles without a licence was the reply. Just gets funnier and funnier doesn't it. Then the wife comes out with a cuppa for me and he starts demanding to know why she is employing a 'pleb' like me when she should be using a professional. Luckily my wife has a wicked sense of humour and she said that i was cheap only charging her a cup of tea and a roll in bed! The guy turned a funny colour something between red wine and green, stormed back to his van and returned with a camera and took my picture. Again, the wife was really quick and gave me a cuddle , asked of he would take one of the two of us and he stormed off. we fell about laughing, it was just so funny! The end of the story is that today we were shopping at our local country store getting food for the dog etc. and in walks the idiot. He comes over to the lad helping me and relates the story to him. He nearly wets himself (he's a close friend) and lets the truth out that we're married, live at the address he is on about, and basically what a prat he is. Everyone is laughing now and he storms out telling the world that he has photographs and is going to report me to the police for setting a mole trap. I ask you, was he just having a bad couple of days or did a rabid mole gnaw on his thumb? how you didnt name this bloke is a miracle id have told everyone his name Quote Link to post
ellir0305 9 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 wow that guys sounds like a top class twat, but good on you and your wife for making him look even worse lol. i think a little 'alteration' to the sign on his van might be in order Quote Link to post
Squirrel_Basher 17,100 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 Better still ,is the prick on here .Name him ,you know you want to . Quote Link to post
othickman 6 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 :clapper: :clapper: Anyway...>>CLICKY<< ... which one was it? Go on...y'know you want to! Quote Link to post
ellir0305 9 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 :clapper: :clapper: Anyway...>>CLICKY<< ... which one was it? Go on...y'know you want to! Quote Link to post
Matt 160 Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 Twats like that give us all a bad name. Name and shame so that we can make sure this doesn't happen again please. BTW - did ye catch yer mole? Quote Link to post
Tis TM 8 Posted July 22, 2009 Report Share Posted July 22, 2009 :clapper: :clapper: Anyway...>>CLICKY<< ... which one was it? Go on...y'know you want to! love your style!! Brilliant tale, that'll be told for years to come Quote Link to post
andybrock 2 Posted July 22, 2009 Report Share Posted July 22, 2009 Go on make our day........name the nit-wit Quote Link to post
camies 1 Posted July 22, 2009 Author Report Share Posted July 22, 2009 Sorry but the boss (wife) won't let me name him! She feels that he won't be troubling us again, EVER AGAIN, and will most likely change where he buys his supplies from as well! and yes, I got the mole (little sod!) Quote Link to post
bullx 12 Posted July 22, 2009 Report Share Posted July 22, 2009 Great story Camies,i say you had a great laugh at his expence,you must have great patience,if it was me ,his arse and my foot would have something in common. Quote Link to post
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