RaiderBoy 19 Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 On the border of England and Wales there's this small forest that's managed by a couple of wardens, one from England and one from Wales. Whilst patrolling the forest one day, the Welsh warden comes across a fox caught in a trap. Immediately he returns to his office and phones the english warden and tells him that one of his foxes is caught in a trap. "How do you know it's one of our foxes?" asks the english warden. "Well," replies the welsh warden, "He's already chewed off three of his legs, and he's still trapped Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RaiderBoy 19 Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 A english old timer is in a bar, chating to a young man. "Lad, look out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I built that fence stone by stone with me own two hands. I piled it for months. But do they call me charles-the-Fence-Builder? Nooo..." Then, the old man gestures at the bar, "Look here at the bar. Do ya see how smooth and just it is? I planed that surface down by me own achin' back. I carved that wood with me own hard labour, for eight days. But do they call me charles-the-Bar-builder? Nooo..." Then, the old man points out the window, "Eh, Laddy, look out to sea... Do ya see that pier that stretches out as far as the eye can see? I built that pier with the sweat off me back. I nailed it board by board. But do they call me charles-the-Pier-Builder? Nooo..." Then the old man looks around nervously, making certain that no one is paying attention., "But ya f**k one goat..." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
greatwhitehunter 47 Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 Well I live in the fine county of Swansea, does that count as Welsh? I think you'll find that Harrycatcat's first joke is incorrect, its "What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Cardiff?" :D You can tell I'm a Jack i can tell your a twat Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RaiderBoy 19 Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 One of the english national daily newspapers is asking readers "what it means to be english?". Some of the emails are hilarious but this is one from a chap in Switzerland... "Being english is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then traveling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV. And the most english thing of all? Suspicion of anything foreign". Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SportingShooter 0 Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 Well I live in the fine county of Swansea, does that count as Welsh? I think you'll find that Harrycatcat's first joke is incorrect, its "What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Cardiff?" :D You can tell I'm a Jack i can tell your a twat Bloody Bluebirds! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest fence_hopper Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 the only reason why the english beat urs in football is they have more poofs, real men play rugby Quote Link to post Share on other sites
greatwhitehunter 47 Posted May 15, 2009 Report Share Posted May 15, 2009 the only reason why the english beat urs in football is they have more poofs, real men play rugby real men go hunting , shooting or fishing Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TIMMAY 6 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 I'm in carmarthenshire. got a couple of jokes to throw in' a man in an english rugby top bought a donkey and proudly rode it round the pub carpark....... 'Nice donkey mate', shouted one of the drinkers, 'what sex is it?' 'female!'said the man..... 'How can you tell?' asked the drinker..... 'well' said the man 'on the way here tonight at least 20 people have shouted look at the smelly c*nt on that donkey!' GOVERNMENT INITIATIVE LAUNCHED. So women aren't mislead any further, men with a 3" or less cock have to display a white flag with a red cross on their car! When god was making the earth, he was spending a lot of time on one particular small part, which prompted one of the angels to ask what he was doing. God replied ' I am building a beautiful land which will have rolling hills, stunning mountains, fertile land, hundreds of miles of glorious coastline, fantasic rivers, and great people, I will call it Wales!' The angel said 'isn't it unfair to give all these fabulous things to one small country?' 'No' said god 'you haven't seen the b4sterds i'm putting next to them!' An English politician was giving a speech in Aberystwyth. He said, “I was born an Englishman. I have been an Englishman all my life, and I will die an Englishman!†“What’s wrong boyo?†shouted a voice from the crowd.†Got no ambition, have you?†Quote Link to post Share on other sites
aaronpigeonplucker 32 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 ha! pob person arall arno y wefan hyn ddim gallu siarad cymraeg! dwi ar ben fy hyn. translates to ha! every other person on this sight can't speak welsh! i'm all by myself. i speak fluent welsh and live east of cardiff Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dabhand 887 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 1 MORE HAHAH Englishman, Welshman, Fit Blonde and a nun are travelling in the same train carriage. The train goes thorugh a dark tunnel and a SMACK sound. When the train emerges from the tunnel into the light, the Englishman is in agony - rubbing his face. The Nun thinks - ' i bet he tried to touch up the blonde girl and she slapped him.' The Blonde thinks - ' i bet he tried to cop a feel off the Nun and she slapped him' Welshman thinks - 'I can't wait 2 go through another tunnel so i can hit that English c**t again!' :friends: well done whitey Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dabhand 887 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 what do english birds use their underwear for keeping their ankles warm Quote Link to post Share on other sites
desertdog 149 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 thats cracking boys,good banter Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Dabhand 887 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 cat cat some good jokes mate, IL tell you the only good thing about an english man umMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM! give me a few days and IL get back to you when i think of something Quote Link to post Share on other sites
desertdog 149 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 well i was gonna say,how many brocks on here, but england is no longer ours, so im having devolution in cambridgeshire,fek tha rest. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Catcher 1 639 Posted May 16, 2009 Report Share Posted May 16, 2009 1 MORE HAHAH Englishman, Welshman, Fit Blonde and a nun are travelling in the same train carriage. The train goes thorugh a dark tunnel and a SMACK sound. When the train emerges from the tunnel into the light, the Englishman is in agony - rubbing his face. The Nun thinks - ' i bet he tried to touch up the blonde girl and she slapped him.' The Blonde thinks - ' i bet he tried to cop a feel off the Nun and she slapped him' Welshman thinks - 'I can't wait 2 go through another tunnel so i can hit that English c**t again!' :friends: well done whitey Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.