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mel b

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Everything posted by mel b

  1. mel b
    I'm getting hornier by the minute . Ol ditchy is just a bit dirty , because he got caught smuggling olives through Norfolk airport. He'd got 25kg of olives plugged up his ass , and the tiger moth couldn't get off the ground .
  2. mel b
    Envy is such an ugly emotion. Dry your eyes mate , it's understandable that you're upset because I get the olive master , and you get sprouts .
  3. mel b
    I'd bum any bloke that had such fine taste in olives
  4. mel b
    That's a mackem peak , and a ditchman trough.
  5. mel b
    He's watching yknow .
  6. mel b

    Migrants

    mel b replied to Bangersanmash's topic in General Talk

    I love that man , and I'm not ashamed to say it . He's the modern day john Wayne . I just hope he keeps his promises or he'll look like a right bell end .
  7. mel b
    That looks nice . How did it taste ?.
  8. mel b
    You see what happens when you start eating vegetarian food . You just don't have the constitution for it .
  9. mel b
    I'm starting to see a connection with rear admiral ditchman here . His favorite motto , is , never leave your friends behind !. It's all starting to drop into place now .
  10. mel b
    He'll be here in a minute , as soon as his nail varnish is dry
  11. mel b
    You know when you walked into that eeerrr biker bar ?. Did that fella in the leather hat and arseless riding chaps , have a Norfolk accent ???.
  12. mel b
    We posted at the same time , everyone here must be thinking the same thing I reckon .
  13. mel b
    Yep , I always knew he was a bummer on the quiet
  14. mel b
    Vegetarian???? . No good will come of it I tells ya !!! .
  15. mel b
    Very macabre, but very interesting mack .
  16. mel b
    Absolutely top marks for that one mack
  17. mel b
  18. mel b
    Yes , just as long as they stay under 12ft/lb .
  19. mel b
    Sorry mate, I've only just seen your pm. Your Christmas delivery of five shaven hamsters with wet noses will be on the way ASAP. Can you please try to be a bit more careful with this batch , and only shove them up one at a time.
  20. mel b
    Where about are you flacko ?. I'm in tipton.
  21. mel b
    I've got birds coming out of my ears , but you're welcome to a few sausage rolls when she makes them .
  22. mel b
    f**k me , I've got to go and shoot more pheasants now . I'd never thought of black pudding, and I reckon they'll taste fantastic
  23. mel b
  24. mel b
  25. mel b
    That's not burn , that's flavour . It's taken me feckin years to train her to cook things how I like them . Ditchie would use his little todger to bodge the holes in the pastry , then I'd have mini sausage rolls That's how he lost his doughnut making job at Co op yknow .
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