mel b
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Everything posted by mel b
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You'll be making me blush like a virgin after her first kiss .
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We're you getting a card for a special friend mack .
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Where do you live king ?. We've got enough turkey to feed another 6 or 8 people if you're stuck mate.
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Reminder for ditchman.
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I can tell by your grinch like demeanour, that you didn't clip the hamsters nails this morning .ho ho feckin ho santa claus .
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Happy Christmas to all .
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You're just jealous of the attention I get when I undress in a gay bar .
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That's me in full on party mode
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That food looks delicious, yet sounds homosexual
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That looks suspiciously close to diced hamster to me .
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News doesn't come much better than that .
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In fairness , the donkey said that you were pretty good at hand jobs .
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Same here . Not being fully with it , really wears you out.
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Dude the rejection hurt more than the broken leg
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I've just remembered the time that I was in hospital with a broken neck( it was only a cracked vertebrae). I'd been given morphine and something else , and was taken for a scan in a wheelchair. I was sitting in the chair minding my own business , when someone walking past asked me if I was OK. It turned out to be a stunning blonde nurse . She lifted my head up , and said is it just the medication love? , all I could do was sort of grunt , but as this stunning nurse looked at me , I could feel the dribble running over my bottom lip , and down my chin .
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It took me by surprise when I had the scan . I forgot to add broken neck to the list as well .
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The last time that I had a really bad episode with my back , I was given gabapentin and Co codamol . I lost about 6 weeks . I'm not one for getting stoned and I really didn't enjoy the experience. Several things that I do remember, are the amazingly beautiful colours of the goldfish , that were living in my toilet bowl , and being able to understand what the birds were saying , as I sat outside the caravan in my woodland. My Mrs reckons that I was listening to them for 4 hours before I snapped back to reality. My back was still agony , I just didn't care .
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I should have added . I wouldn't swim in the sea if I lived in Blackpool. I'd rather keep the bad back .
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My mate had a huge terrapin in his koi pond for years . If he ever needed to do anything that involved putting his hands in the water , he'd have to drain it until he could find the terrapin , then remove it while he did the work , because it used to try to bite him . He was scared to death of the thing .
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I only tried the swimming baths. To be honest , if I lived by the sea , I'd swim every day . I love swimming in , the sea , rivers , lakes , but I really can't get excited about swimming pools.
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Fair play to him , we all need to make a living .
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I tried swimming, but it didn't work for me. I'd guess that everyone is slightly different, and the pressure is in a slightly different place. I didn't honestly think that walking would help much , but it's turned out to be a life saver.
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Is that how he's earning the money for his new coat .
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My back is agony no matter if I'm in a thin phase or a fat phase. The full list is. Arthritis Osteoarthritis 5 bulging discs 1 collapsed disc Major sciatica on the left Minor sciatica on the right It's fecked for plenty of reason Too fat sometimes , lifting weights that are stupidly heavy ( I used to be able to lift the back of most cars to get axle stands underneath) , working as a mechanic for years( and lifting engines in and out on my own) , working as a lorry driver for years , and a knife straight through my leg. Whenever I walk , I ha
