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mel b

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Everything posted by mel b

  1. mel b
    He'll be here in a minute , as soon as his nail varnish is dry
  2. mel b
    You know when you walked into that eeerrr biker bar ?. Did that fella in the leather hat and arseless riding chaps , have a Norfolk accent ???.
  3. mel b
    We posted at the same time , everyone here must be thinking the same thing I reckon .
  4. mel b
    Yep , I always knew he was a bummer on the quiet
  5. mel b
    Vegetarian???? . No good will come of it I tells ya !!! .
  6. mel b
    Very macabre, but very interesting mack .
  7. mel b
    Absolutely top marks for that one mack
  8. mel b
  9. mel b
    Yes , just as long as they stay under 12ft/lb .
  10. mel b
    Sorry mate, I've only just seen your pm. Your Christmas delivery of five shaven hamsters with wet noses will be on the way ASAP. Can you please try to be a bit more careful with this batch , and only shove them up one at a time.
  11. mel b
    Where about are you flacko ?. I'm in tipton.
  12. mel b
    I've got birds coming out of my ears , but you're welcome to a few sausage rolls when she makes them .
  13. mel b
    f**k me , I've got to go and shoot more pheasants now . I'd never thought of black pudding, and I reckon they'll taste fantastic
  14. mel b
  15. mel b
  16. mel b
    That's not burn , that's flavour . It's taken me feckin years to train her to cook things how I like them . Ditchie would use his little todger to bodge the holes in the pastry , then I'd have mini sausage rolls That's how he lost his doughnut making job at Co op yknow .
  17. mel b
    Pheasant , chorizo , and cheese, sausage rolls. Breast meat from half a dozen pheasants, two horseshoes of spicy chorizo , a big onion , salt and pepper. Chop them up, and mince them all together. Wrap a piece of mature cheddar with the mince , then wrap it in flakey pastry, and chuck them in the oven. I must say , they taste great , and theirs enough mince left over , to make burgers rolled in kibbled onion. They're proper blokes sausage rolls , as thick as your wrist , stuffed with meat and cheese , and cooked until you can taste the pastry.
  18. mel b
    No , but you've just ruined my hamster story .
  19. mel b
    I was going to tell a dwarf story , but I'm too polite .
  20. mel b
    He so wants to be a bad boy . I cringe at some of the shite he does.
  21. mel b
    You're so f***ing jealous of my orangery and fine art collection
  22. mel b
    Yes , that's what they all say
  23. mel b
    I know who he is now mack . I actually watched that film a few weeks ago . It's odd because I can't usually stand anything with Danny dyer , because he's a complete knob.
  24. mel b
    It'll be that well known 1950s gay icon , that macks been stalking for weeks .
  25. mel b
    I see you're roughing it as usual mack . Who's Geoff bell ?.
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