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Mister Gain

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Everything posted by Mister Gain

  1. Mister Gain
    Excellent stuff Matt, can't beat a bit of homemade charcuterie. Can be a bit hit and miss at times though, but when it comes right it's all worth it. When I used to make the biltong and salami's I used to let them age in a box I knocked up out of offcuts of wood and MDF, with a lightbulb at the bottom and airflow holes top and bottom and it worked a treat. I'll have a look and see if I can find a picture of it and post on this thread if you don't mind.
  2. Mister Gain
    I woke to go to the toilet in the middle of the night and noticed a burglar sneaking through next door's garden. Suddenly my neighbour came from nowhere and smacked him over the head with a shovel killing him instantly. He then began to dig a grave with the shovel. Astonished, I got back into bed. My wife said, "Darling, you're shaking, what is it?" "You'll never believe what I've just seen!" I said, "That tosser next door has still got my bloody shovel."
  3. Mister Gain
    My new business is doing really well, I buy ex-military land mines and turn them into prayer mats, prophets just keep going through the roof.
  4. Mister Gain
    Have made a few venison pastrami a few years back out of muntjac haunches, and made bacon out of the loins. Both very nice although the pastrami was a bit of pissing about with cure #1, but the bacon is easy using a commercial dry cure. All the rest of the carcasses went to sausage with the addition of a bit of pork belly/fat otherwise on cooking the texture can become grainy.
  5. Mister Gain
    I've had octopus a few different ways over the years, cooked in red wine, grilled on a BBQ in Cyprus, bought a jar of pickled baby octopus in the chinese cash and carry, but by far the best was the Greek pickled octopus salad I had last August in Nikos Tavern, Ringwood East, Melbourne. It was a starter but was a meal in its own right. The grub there was outstanding so if anyone's out there I would recommend this place. I would eat it raw, but not alive, really don't see the point. RSPCA would have a field day out there I would draw the line at the rat and chicks, and WTF are those fe
  6. Mister Gain
    Nectar of the gods Lamb, beef, chicken, turkey etc. doesn't matter which, particularly look forward to the turkey and duck stew on boxing day. Used to be partial to oxtail stew but the price of it nowadays is robbery. My old nan used to have a lamb stew going for about 4-5 days and just topped it up with a bit more meat and veg and couple more dumplings.
  7. Mister Gain
    "What do we want?" "A cure for tourettes" "When do we want it?" "CNUT"
  8. Mister Gain
    Thanks mate, made the table and 6 chairs from iroko, heavy as fook, should see me out.
  9. Mister Gain
    This is the eating outside setup in my garden, being covered with twin wall poly we don't worry when it rains. We even BBQ stuff in the winter and fetch it in to eat. You can see the smoker alongside the BBQ.
  10. Mister Gain
    Devon flighter, yes, they stay alight well... BUT... only use their dust. A sausagemaking forum I used to use, lots of guys had trouble when they sourced their dust from other/cheaper places to try to save a few bob, but as I sourced mine from macsbbq I have never had a problem. I see they produce a larger version of the original smoker now, but not heard any feedback on that. It seems expensive for what it is, as does the dust, but I don't mind paying an extra couple of bob for a quality end product. I have tried hickory smoke powder and liquid smoke to acquire the smoke taste on bacon but i
  11. Mister Gain
    I made a smoker from a 2 drawer filing cabinet. It has a hole in the bottom where a burner ring sits, which is used for hot smoking. If I need to cold smoke, there is a metal flap which folds down covering the hole, and I use a ProQ cold smoke generator from macsbbq.com, which smokes for up to 10 hours. I tested cheese on it using a rubbery old piece of edam (is that really cheese?) and oak dust and it actually made it edible. For hot smoking I have a metal container which I fill with white oak shavings. I tried to attach a picture but this site is really playing me up for posting and uplo
  12. Mister Gain
    You can get it from vet-medic.com, £15.60 for 250ml but... you need a prescription from your vet.
  13. Mister Gain
    Caul fat is hard to come by nowadays, don't know why as all pigs have it. Used to try the butchers but they never had it and half of them didn't even know what it was. Only place I found that did it was one of those turkish food centres, and the price of it was astronomical for what it is. Must admit that it does add a nice skin to the faggots, but only bought it the once.
  14. Mister Gain
    I have seen a fox stalking a pair of canada geese on an island in the Silt Pond at Horton Kirby. It managed to grab one but didn't keep hold. Thing is that the closest part of the island to the main bank is 40ft and average depths are 6ft to 8ft, there are no bridges nor a ferry service so I can only assume it swam across.
  15. Mister Gain
    Looks like you need a good quality digital zoom like I have got.
  16. Mister Gain
    Do it properly through the council mate, using their guidelines. https://www2.barnsley.gov.uk/services/environment-and-planning/pollution/noise/make-a-noise-complaint My mate down the road has a very vocal doberman and he had the council on to him.
  17. Mister Gain
    Only got a rather crappy nokia X3 with an equally crappy camera, but here's a couple from last year on a misty summer dawn at the local park. ...and one indoors of toilet training your dog. First, teach him how to rag the piss mats. Charlie keeping an eye on us.
  18. Mister Gain
  19. Mister Gain
    Apologies for dragging this thread up, but Ted of Ted's Holdover has put up a video on youtube trying to establish a scientific explanation to the post headshot twitching. As it is something all of us will witness I thought you might be interested in the video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1INVWP-HnI
  20. Mister Gain
    Last cider I drank was Double Vision Cider (7.4%). Bought it from Marlpit Farm, Wierton Road, Boughton-Monchelsea, Maidstone. Transferred straight from the cask into a half gallon polythene container. Went down very well once I got home from lamping, but would have liked it a little drier.though, that said I would have it again.
  21. Mister Gain
    It was only a few months ago when there were 6 or 7 sexual assaults in the Lambeth/Clapham/Brixton areas of London, he even sexually assaulted one woman outside her front door and a good image was caught on the cctv. It was reported as a man of Asian appearance. Then, last week in Carshalton there were 3 sexual assaults, again a man of Asian appearance. Asian?? So you mean they could of been Chinese? I heard those Japanese are flooding in in the backs of lorries and gang raping women. ....on second thoughts...perhaps 'an appearance normally associated with muslims' would be more
  22. Mister Gain
    It was only a few months ago when there were 6 or 7 sexual assaults in the Lambeth/Clapham/Brixton areas of London, he even sexually assaulted one woman outside her front door and a good image was caught on the cctv. It was reported as a man of Asian appearance. Then, last week in Carshalton there were 3 sexual assaults, again a man of Asian appearance.
  23. Mister Gain
    Good to see some quality in this flat-pack world.
  24. Mister Gain
    Rabid, making good dry cured bacon is nowhere near as labour intensive as making sausages, and you need no special equipment other than large griplock plastic bags. Dry cures are easily available from butcher suppliers such as scobiesdirect where it is currently £2.45 for a kg of cure, and at about 40 grams of cure per kilo of meat/fat represents good value IMO when you compare it to that pumped shite that shrinks by half when you cook it as it oozes the white froth. If you use a 2" thick piece of belly you could be tucking in to it in about 5 days.
  25. Mister Gain
    In all my years of fishing I had never seen one, but last year at the ripe old age of 61 I saw one in the local park about a quarter of a mile away, in fact I disturbed it as it saw me before I saw it. 2 days later I saw another, possibly the same one as it was near where I saw the first. Not seen one since.
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